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Original poster

I am playing christmas card chicken with dh

27 replies

Deminism · 13/12/2019 12:11

I told him that I am not writing the cards to his family this year (about five cards in total). I did give him a pack of cards, tell him to let me know if he needs addresses, and tell him the last posting date is Monday. I have reminded him twice.

It does matter to me if they do not get cards. But still I am not doing it. And still I know he has not done it. Sigh

OP posts:
TheReluctantCountess · 13/12/2019 13:26

I put my foot down about this a couple of year ago. I’ve bought the cards, and there are plenty because I only send a handful. Mine got sent over a week ago. His are still not done. Not my problem!

mummmy2017 · 13/12/2019 14:06

Don't weaken.
Do it once and your back to wife work.

Sirzy · 13/12/2019 14:08

Does he want to send cards to them?

If it bothers you but not him then I think you best do them. I stopped doing Christmas cards a few years back so no amount of reminding or pestering would make me want to!

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LasthingIlldo · 13/12/2019 14:13

I stopped doing cards to extended in-laws several years ago. Dh doesn't send any because he simply doesn't care or want to. So in-laws get none.
For me that's case closed I refuse to waste mental energy worrying about something Dh doesn't want to do and isn't bothered by!

happychange · 13/12/2019 14:18

I remind him once and leave him to it
If his nieces don't get a Christmas present it's not my problem!
Similarly I don't expect DH brother to send us a card either (or his wife for that matter!)

HunterAngel · 13/12/2019 14:21

I cut down the number of cards this year. I’ve only sent them to people DH knows that I actually like. Trimmed the list down nicely! Now just work and close family cards to sort out

LeekMunchingSheepShagger · 13/12/2019 14:24

I’m doing the same Xmas Grin

I’ve gone so far as to buy cards and stamps, and have left them on the kitchen side with the address book (where they have now been for a week.) That’s as far as I’m prepared to go.

HalyardHitch · 13/12/2019 14:26

Last posting day is Monday? I've not even thought about cards yet!

Flower777 · 13/12/2019 14:30

Now put it out of your mind!

It’s up to him now.

TerpsichoreanMuse · 13/12/2019 14:32

No, Weds 18th for second class and 20th for first class.

www.royalmail.com/christmas/last-posting-dates

Tableclothing · 13/12/2019 14:34

Don't remind him again, and if he needs addresses for his own flipping family he can text them himself.

mumderland · 13/12/2019 14:37

I stopped this a few years ago, DH is capable of writing and sending cards so he can do his side of the family. Why should it be the woman's job to do it

00100001 · 13/12/2019 14:37

My DH sends zero cards to his family.

Plus he has to buy all presents for his side.

They get vouchers bought on Christmas Eve and emailed to them.

00100001 · 13/12/2019 14:40

He also doesn't buy any of his friends gifts.

Then gets abit miffed if my friends don't get him something. I asked him "what did you buy Rachel?" And he Huff's abit and says "fair enough".

He also stopped complaining when I wrote 'to X from Binary' on gifts when I asked him what the gift was 'he' was giving to X...he had no idea!

NoSquirrels · 13/12/2019 14:44

Can’t be last posting date so soon, surely?

lazylinguist · 13/12/2019 14:49

Why are you reminding him? I do most of the Christmassy stuff here,but dh knows full well he is in charge of presents and cards for his side of the family. If he didn't do them, they wouldn't get done.

AdaFromYorkshire · 13/12/2019 14:56

DH has always sorted out cards for his family, and sorts out presents for his numerous small great nephews and nieces too. I can't even remember all their names, never mind think about what they might like. He's a fully functioning adult though, and it wouldn't cross his mind that I might do it.

sirfredfredgeorge · 13/12/2019 15:12

It does matter to me if they do not get cards. But still I am not doing it. And still I know he has not done it. Sigh

But if it doesn't matter to him, then he's pretty unlikely to do it, especially as he knows his family better and therefore in a better position to judge on their part.

What are you actually trying to achieve? If it's to get out of a job you don't want, then you have to accept it might not get done, no-one is actually hurt if the cards aren't sent.

WilheldivaHater · 13/12/2019 15:26

Can I ask why it matters to you if they get cards?

AutumnRose1 · 13/12/2019 15:29

Don’t say anything more to him about it.

Bluntness100 · 13/12/2019 15:31

Why are you making such a big deal of it? I don't send cards, I don't mention it, if my husband wishes to he can. He sees the cards we get, his call if he wishes to do cards in return. No discussion on it.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 13/12/2019 15:32

Just stop sending cards. I've not sent a Christmas card for about 5 years. It's wasting money and time. It is absoloutley not worth it

Whoops75 · 13/12/2019 15:36

World won’t end if they don’t get Card’s.

I don’t send any either, so much waste and expense.

Selfsettling3 · 13/12/2019 15:43

You have already

  1. Given him a pack of cards
  2. Told him to ask you for addresses
  3. Told him the last posting date
  4. Reminded him
  5. Remind him again

It sounds like you have done way too much already.

Silencedwitness · 13/12/2019 15:50

I don’t do it anymore. Nor do I buy presents for his family because I figure why should I bother when he isn’t it?

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