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Original poster

Cleaner doesn’t celebrate Christmas

51 replies

PurpleDaisies · 05/12/2019 16:57

My very lovely cleaner mentioned today that she doesn’t celebrate Christmas. I’d normally give a card and a box of chocs as a small present. Would you do it anyway? Thinking of waiting until new year.

OP posts:
whatnottodo · 05/12/2019 17:54

I wouldn't just incase it offends her, if she's told you she doesn't celebrate Christmas then leave it at that..
Back when I was in college we did secret Santa and one lad who was a JW said he wouldn't participate but the teacher had given everyone a piece of paper with the name of whoever they had to buy for anyway.. When it came to gift swapping he picked up his present still in the wrapping paper and put it in the bin.. Tbf he had already explained that he doesn't celebrate Christmas but it was super awkward..

VenusClapTrap · 05/12/2019 17:54

I’d go for the thank you for your help this year angle.

I used to have a Muslim cleaner who always gave my dc Christmas presents.

WorraLiberty · 05/12/2019 18:13

I wouldn't just incase it offends her, if she's told you she doesn't celebrate Christmas then leave it at that..

You'd have to be a special brand of wanker to be offended by a well meant gift at Christmas in a Christian country though.

Just like the other person you mentioned there, where put it in the bin.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Christmas
WorraLiberty · 05/12/2019 18:14

*who put it in the bin

Dyrne · 05/12/2019 18:15

I think people comparing it to Muslim colleagues are missing the fact that JW’s actively don’t celebrate Christmas etc so giving them a Christmas gift isn’t just a meaningless but nice thing; it’s actively trampling over their wish to actively not celebrate:

I agree that a generic “thank you for your hard work this year” gift might be the safest bet.

WorraLiberty · 05/12/2019 18:16

Accepting a gift is not 'actively celebrating' anything though.

It's accepting a gift from the person who does celebrate.

That's the difference.

Ivalueloyaltyaboveallelse · 05/12/2019 18:18

I would just give her something little as a thank you for your hard work.

littleduckeggblue · 05/12/2019 18:19

Give them with a thank you card

BlaueLagune · 05/12/2019 18:20

I agree with people suggesting a happy new year card and a present to say thank you. It's also the end of the year, not just Christmas, so you can easily say thank you for a good year's work.

andpancakesforbreakfast · 05/12/2019 18:25

Accepting a gift is not 'actively celebrating' anything though.

It's accepting a gift from the person who does celebrate.

perfectly summarised.
A "Happy New Year" will work too.

HerRoyalNotness · 05/12/2019 18:27

They don’t technically celebrate NY either so I wouldn’t get a card that says that. Just a thank-you card will do. It’s very kind of you

WorraLiberty · 05/12/2019 18:29

Actually I've just realised the OP hasn't even said her cleaner is a JW.

Alsohuman · 05/12/2019 18:30

If she’s a JW and has gone out of her way to tell you she doesn’t celebrate Christmas it would be the height of disrespect to give her a present. She’s told you for a reason. Give her a just because gift at another time.

PurpleFrames · 05/12/2019 18:30

Hi another purple!

I don't celebrate Xmas and wouldn't be offended to receive a card as is is your beliefs. Perhaps a new year card would be a compromise if you're not sure? Everyone loves chocs! Just be careful that they're alcohol free if that's a dietary requirement for your employee.

Pipandmum · 05/12/2019 18:41

One of my oldest friends is Jewish. I send her a christmas card every year and just write happy hanukkah in it and a catch up note. It has pix of my kids and I don't think she's offended. She always liked coming over seeing the tree when we were kids (and having a sneaky slice of bacon or three)! Means I'm thinking of her.

WorraLiberty · 05/12/2019 18:42

Alsohuman the cleaner hasn't told the OP anything.

"I think she’s a JW but I was rushing out the door and didn’t ask."

Pipandmum · 05/12/2019 18:42

Point being giver her a greetings of the season card just because you're thinking of her and her family this time of year!

ForalltheSaints · 05/12/2019 18:49

I would respect her wishes and get nothing.

Alsohuman · 05/12/2019 19:57

You missed a very important word - if @WorraLiberty.

CurlsandCurves · 05/12/2019 20:41

I have family members who are JW.

If it were me, I’d give a gift as a way of saying thank you for all their hard work throughout the year.

CurlsandCurves · 05/12/2019 20:43

Sorry, meant to add, then no matter her beliefs you have shown her she is appreciated for the work she does, Christmas or not.

saraclara · 05/12/2019 20:48

If she's JW definitely don't give her anything that could be perceived as a nod to Christmas. JW's actively reject Christmas, which is very different from simply not celebrating it.

My Muslim colleagues and clients on the other hand, sent me Christmas cards and gifts and seem to enjoy the festival, as Jesus is one of their prophets.

babba2014 · 05/12/2019 20:53

If she doesn't celebrate then don't give it. She will feel relieved. Give a gift randomly in the year, she will really value it.

saraclara · 05/12/2019 21:15

Yep. Since she's bothered to tell you she doesn't celebrate, you'd be being disrespectful to give her anything. She'd be wrong-footed at best.

A New Year card with a gift to say thanks for everything she did in 2019 sounds fine.

WingingItSince1973 · 05/12/2019 21:59

I'm a JW and yes although dont actively celebrate Christmas I also do appreciate other peoples point of views so if I was bought a gift at this time of year I would accept gracefully as it's kind to be thought of. Maybe a thank you card instead of christmas one though as it's more likely to be put on display. Xx