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Original poster

Feelings for my child's teacher...

40 replies

Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 20:09

OK. So I namechanged. Obviously!!

In September DS got a new teacher. She seemed lovely, young ish, keen, actually could teach. So I was really pleased for DS as he's always found school really hard. I enjoyed talking to her very briefly each day.

Them last week it hit me like a brick in the face that I have feelings for her. She's 28 I'm 35. I have a husband and 3 children. I've never so much as kissed a woman. I don't know what's happened to me. I feel physically sick when I see her from the adrenalin.

Help me. I've decided it's a mid life crisis. Clearly nothing will ever happen. How do I move on from this?

OP posts:
marvellousnightforamooncup · 04/12/2019 20:11

Just a crush, ignore it until it goes away.

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 20:28

It's just so intense. I spend half the day thinking DS will need to move schools and the other half thinking I will have to tell her how I feel.

I honestly did not have feelings this strong for my husband.

OP posts:
Neolara · 04/12/2019 20:30

Don't tell her how you feel! This is very, very unlikely to go down well.

WorraLiberty · 04/12/2019 20:30

I spend half the day thinking DS will need to move schools and the other half thinking I will have to tell her how I feel.

Don't be so ridiculous

It's a crush. It'll pass.

Notsurehowtofixit · 04/12/2019 20:30

Just drop him at the door. You don't need to go in. I speak to my kids teachers like three times a year.

Pinkblueberry · 04/12/2019 20:31

It’s definitely a girl crush. It happens. You’ll get over it...

SocksRock · 04/12/2019 20:31

Just a crush. The last one I had I ended up applying for new jobs to get away from the poor oblivious colleague. Two weeks later I was all WTF was I crazy? Luckily the jobs did not come to anything...

Pinkblueberry · 04/12/2019 20:38

I honestly did not have feelings this strong for my husband.

Well that probably says more about your relationship with him than your feelings for her. Seriously - you barely know this woman. You talk to her briefly about you DS I presume from time to time and otherwise it’s hi and bye. You’re not a teenager. Whatever you do don’t tell her ffs Hmm

AlwaysOnAbloodyDiet · 04/12/2019 20:38

This exact thread appeared on mumsnet before, but it was a mum and female pre-school teacher.

I'd imagine that it's actually quite common. Don't overthink it, it will pass.

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 20:39

I'm not actually going to tell her, I've not quite lost my mind completely Xmas Grin

I'm just completely shocked by the intensity of it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 20:42

Pinkblueberry thanks so much for your help.

Alwsysonadiet I'm going to have to search for that thread!

OP posts:
FestiveFavourites · 04/12/2019 20:42

Don't even think about telling her. She'd be mortified. Is she even gay? Channel your lust into a more acceptable fantasy. Replace the teacher with Gwen Stefani or Anastasia and roll with it.

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 20:49

Jesus. So if the teacher wasn't younger, but older and I had an extra child I could have written it!!

Ok. I feel a bit better. I'm clearly not the only slightly unhinged person out there.

She's definetly not gay. I'm definitely not gay. I've literally never fancied a woman before. It's honestly such a bizarre feeling.

OP posts:
AlwaysOnAbloodyDiet · 04/12/2019 20:52

I only just read that OP's update now, after I had linked it.
Probably not the best thread to direct you to Confused

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 20:57

Yeah I just read it too! Perfect. She is clearly also in love with me.

OP posts:
FestiveFavourites · 04/12/2019 21:01

That linked thread reads like a fantasy to me. Maybe I'm too cynical?

Longfacenow · 04/12/2019 21:04

How relieved I am to see you are not going to humiliate yourself and declare your love for her.

Get a hobby.

Cuddlysnowleopard · 04/12/2019 21:04

It's a crush, and apparently fairly common. The teacher has to bond with her class, that involves you bonding as well to some extent. That gets mixed up with other bonding feelings, and you get a crush.

For goodness sake, don't say anything!

AlwaysOnAbloodyDiet · 04/12/2019 21:08

Of course she is Xmas Grin

Just don't do anything silly!

Corroboree · 04/12/2019 21:25

I have this too atm- completely crushing on my DS' teacher. I think it's because he is nice to DS, it just makes me like him [groan]

merryhouse · 04/12/2019 21:27

I've encountered the theory that these crushes - typically experienced by girls for older girls or women - are a recognition of the type of woman you would like to be.

What are the best things about this woman, in your rational brain? Her effortless ability to remember 30 children's targets and extra needs? Her managerial style? Her way of making the child she's dealing with feel valued? Her dress sense?

Now can you work out how to achieve this yourself?

PeterRouseTheFleshofMankind · 04/12/2019 21:30

Woah, now I'm wondering if any of the mums of kids I have taught have ever had a crush on me 😂

Original poster
Wannakisstheteacher · 04/12/2019 21:36

longface does it make you feel good about yourself yo be so bitchy?

OP posts:
Longfacenow · 04/12/2019 21:43

Oh bloody hell you're being serious? I thought it was a silly joke hence suggesting you need a hobby if you are spending half the day in fantasy. I didn't mean to upset you, but I still think you might need a new 'focus'.

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