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Original poster

is she really my best friend or not?

41 replies

corrianderlover · 25/11/2019 17:58

my best friend and me are getting married our weddings are a few months apart, is it wrong of me to get pissed off, that she is not inviting my to be husband? i would never not invite her to be husband as i think he is a part of her and she is my best friend, but she has still decided not to invite mine and even said to me, she only wants to invite people she likes, i don't particularly like her other half but i dont show it and i accept who she chooses,

I even had an argument with my TBH and he accepted even though hes not invited he will let me invite hers, because all he wants is me to be happy.

atm im feeling i value the friendship more than her, what should i do. after this i dont think i can be best friends with her anymore, my feeling have been really hurt, what do you think or am i just being childish?

OP posts:
lolaflores · 25/11/2019 18:04

You r going to have to explain a bit more. Sharing a husband or stand in for husband? I dont...

Itsashame · 25/11/2019 18:19

I think it’s crazy that your best Friend isn’t inviting your fiancé to your wedding. I would be really pissed off unless it’s a tiny tiny wedding

Itsashame · 25/11/2019 18:19

Her wedding obvs, not yours

lolaflores · 25/11/2019 18:25

Sorry! Just realised its husband to be. Yep. He ought to be there. No questions.
Ignore me
Have u asked her why?

icouldcareless · 25/11/2019 18:28

You r going to have to explain a bit more

C'mon - it's not really that difficult. OP has used the phrase 'to be husband/TBH'

Maybe just re-arrange those three words and see if it is any clearer for you.

BeanBag7 · 25/11/2019 18:30

I would definitely be annoyed. Have you already sent the invite out to her? I would be sorely tempted to say "since we are also only inviting people we like, your fiance is not invited" however I wouldnt do that if I wanted to continue to be her friend.

Spied · 25/11/2019 18:30

She's very rude and doesn't care less about your feelings.
If I was her I'd be embarrassed to turn up to your wedding with my oh in tow.
I'd not feel the same about her at all.

misspiggy19 · 25/11/2019 18:36

She isn’t your best friend whatsoever.

Chloemol · 25/11/2019 18:42

She is not your friend, implying she doesn’t like your husband. Time to do the same to her, invite her only

LL83 · 25/11/2019 18:47

I would say to friend "that is your choice, but obviously I cant have your husband at mine either. Hope this doesnt cause a rift between us but I am concerned"

However now she has admitted it is because she doesnt "really like" him i would consider not inviting her either. Does she mean she doesnt know him? Or doesnt like him?

Aquamarine1029 · 25/11/2019 18:54

Why doesn't she like your husband?

Tooner · 25/11/2019 18:57

She's no best friend, what an awful thing to do to you. I wouldn't be inviting her other half to your wedding. What a cow she is.

BrassTactical · 25/11/2019 18:59

But she’s coming to your wedding to the man she doesn’t like??

Unless she has legitimate reasons (is he horrible and absorb?) then she’s a dick and not your best friend sorry. I wouldn’t be having her to your wedding or going to hers.

Gonetoget · 25/11/2019 19:02

Unless you come back with some backstory where he’s done something terrible to her, or you. She is exceptionally rude and not much of a friend.
Has she given an explanation of why she doesn’t like him.

Bluntness100 · 25/11/2019 19:07

Bit odd. Why doesn't she like your partner?

Longfacenow · 25/11/2019 19:10

OP, I think if you have classed her as a best friend you have history together...so if she was on here, what would she tell us about your HTB? She doesn't want you to marry him does she?

Why?

onthecoins · 25/11/2019 19:11

Is there more background? Why doesn't she like your husband? Have they had past issues?

legalseagull · 25/11/2019 20:01

I wouldn't invite someone to my wedding if they didn't like the groom and therefore must disapprove of the marriage

Original poster
corrianderlover · 26/11/2019 00:49

We all work together and we have been out on dates with her other half (OH) all 4 of us together even treated them dinner a few times. It's just that my OH half role is a serious role at work and can't always joke and laugh and she takes it the wrong way. I have explained to her aswell. But she sometimes think he's passive aggressive, but he's just focused when he's at work. And her husband goes out but he's a sit on the fence and doesn't talk or engage in conversation. He's only there to eat. My OH tries to make so much effort to talk to him but its like getting blood out of a stone. The guy is boring. So I can't say I don't like him he's done nothing to me.... literally

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 26/11/2019 06:50

I don't understand op. How is him being serious at work, or focused at work related to how he behaves when socialising and not at work?

Itsashame · 26/11/2019 07:13

They work together bluntness so this is how the friend sees him

GiveHerHellFromUs · 26/11/2019 07:13

@Bluntness100 I think OP means they already made their minds up about her DP based on his work persona, whereas when they go out he tries hard with the other man, who doesn't reciprocate.

OP they're not nice people.
It's one thing not inviting a boyfriend they've never met but to not invite a man they actively socialise with, and just invite his WTB, is out of order, IMO.

Longfacenow · 26/11/2019 07:21

This doesn't make sense. I think your best friend sees something else you don't.

7yo7yo · 26/11/2019 07:22

Say that’s fine. It means I can invite someone I really care about to my wedding instead of having to invite your DH (insert name).

Ohyesiam · 26/11/2019 07:37

They done sounds very likeable.

Presumably her husband would only be at your wedding to eat. Do you really want that?

And no she doesn’t sounds like a friend. What do you get out of the friendship?