Do you stop at traffic lights?

[Blackredblack]

This morning I was out with dh. We stopped at the traffic lights. The road was pretty dead so one car each either side of the lights. Everybody else crossed the road while lights were still red. I started to feel really, really anxious and just desperately wanted to cross but my dh held me back. He’s reasoning being there were lots of children around and by crossing while lights were red I’d be setting a terrible example.

I do have PTSD and severe anxiety so I can’t go outside alone but even with support I massively struggle with traffic lights. I hate standing there, especially if I can see other people crossing.

Dh thinks my reaction is extreme and ds agrees with him!

Do other people wait for lights to change to green or do you cross if you safely can?

black I’m not sure how you’ve taken my post, the exclamation mark suggests you’ve taken offence, that was not my intention, I was trying to give you a positive reason to focus on when not crossing when children are around, rather than worrying that people think you are an idiot (your words) for not crossing.

And they won’t be thinking that anyway, people are pretty self absorbed and will be more concerned about a problem at work/their kids/what’s for tea, than someone waiting to cross a road. I don’t mean that in a patronising way, it’s something I’ve had to come to terms with myself.

justgivemewine, Gosh absolutely no offence taken! I’m sorry it’s just the way I write. What you said was actually very helpful. I would hate my small child to think it was acceptable to cross the road while the light was red.

I just meant I’m going to try harder to be grown up about it. Sorry again!

Phew, I was worried I’d upset you, I’m not always the best at explaining what I mean.

Glad you found it helpful 🙂

To keep them entertained at crossings, while waiting for the Green Man, I showed my kids the little rotating button thing blind people use when there is no audible signal,

www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-ouch-22706881

They used to love waiting for it to start whirling. Kept them at the side of the road without whining for ages. It was 'A Secret' too (when they were very little) and that helped keep them quite and still as well.

OP, I so agree, Mumsnet can be very scary sometimes. I even look a some threads with my head nearly halfway turned as if it’s a scary scene in a film and there are lots of posts I avoid completely as they make me feel uneasy and I haven’t even got involved.
Even so, the kind of support, encouragement, clear thinking and guidance I see on the vast majority of threads I read, is amazing and very inspiring.
That’s such a huge achievement that you self taught so well. It takes discipline and a good brain so you must be quite special. I hope you will gradually start to feel less self conscious so that you can get out there and share your knowledge with the world.
I’m sure there are some people claiming they are doing a superb and perfect job at everything they touch, but, between you and me, most of the time, most people, coast along, pretend they know more than they do, wonder if anyone else can tell, do things on automatic pilot and give their absolute best 15% of the time, , the rest is trying to find their way. Parenting is a prime example of this. Brain surgery or operating a crane probably not the best examples.

Branster thank you. I wish I had a good brain but unfortunately due to my mental health my memory is shot. Your post made me smile though, which is much needed at the moment, so thank you.