To eat Christmas dinner while baby naps?

[bubs80]

Baby normally naps 1-3 should we eat downstairs ( leaving baby upstairs in a travel cot and with baby monitor on) or just eat after with everyone ( and maybe baby will sit nicely in high chair and have a snack)

Baby will be10 months old. We are having dinner at in-laws arriving around 11 and baby will eat lunch around 12 before nap.

Baby currently has all naps in bed with me. It's lovely but will I be anti social if I do that Christmas Day lol

We don't yet have a travel cot

What's everyone else done Christmas day in terms of eating lunch around nap times ?

I don't want to spend the last couple months of my maternity sleep training

But you'll happily send him off to childcare without the ability to settle himself for naps. How unfair on your baby.

He’s the centre of your universe, he’s not the centre of anyone else’s.

This in buckets!

@BlueLadybird so if I say do lunch for 3 would I still be rude to go upstairs with him 1-3?

Not as rude as missing Christmas lunch which you got to choose the time off.

You’re putting a lot of obstacles in the way here - baby has to have lunch at 12, has to nap 1-3, you don’t have a travel cot, cot won’t fit upstairs, you have to leave at 5. It sounds like you don’t really want to go in which case having Christmas at home sounds like a better plan for you.

Surely it's the sensible thing to do? You can relax and actually eat in peace 🎄

@Teachermaths the nursery had absolutely no problem with this and will happily rock babies to sleep . I witnessed this on my visit. Also I never said he was the centre of anyone's universe only mine.

@Teachermaths do not shame for me being the parent I want to be

I'm not shaming you. I'm just stating a fact that your child will struggle in nursery with naps if he cannot self settle. Nursery will bounce him etc. They will not lie next to him for 2 hours.

Going to bed for 2 hours on Christmas day with an almost one year old is making him the centre of other people's universe. They will feel guilty eating without you. They will wonder WTF you are doing next to a sleeping baby.

@Teachermaths I don't always sleep next to him. I have said this earlier that for months he has just been rocked in his pram it was just last couple weeks I wasn't well and found it better to just get some rest next to him. I also found he didn't wake up whereas in pram he would sometimes wake up half way and then I couldn't get him back off . So I was going to just keep the nap in bed for a few more weeks as it's been nice . I would prefer him to nap alone Christmas Day and me to chat to relatives but I just worry he will only have 1 hour and be grouchy all afternoon with them. He is very happy baby but I feel it's because he gets his naps.

I would start helping him to self settle as it will be more upsetting for you when you go back or start settling in session to see him upset. It is hard at first but they quickly get the hang of it and it will make your life easier. I assume with the fact you are doing a 14 hour shift you won't be doing the drop offs so will not be there to comfort him

Ok just read it's only been a couple of weeks you lying next to him. Stop it now it won't hurt as much. Carry on for another 6 weeks and he will expect it.

@popcorndiva I will do 2 long shifts per week. Will drop off not collect though. Still exploring other options regarding childcare and my partners work . I know but it is very upsetting to put him in cot and just walk off with him crying have tried a few things like pick you out down , a little bit of control crying which was awful. He goes to sleep really well when I'm there to soothe him. He will off when rocked in pram but he doesnt look the comfiest for 2 hours . I would happily leave him on bed but it's dangerous. Maybe I should start soothing him rocking him on the bed then transferring to cot once asleep

I think this is why I went to other people's for the first year and invited no on the second.
Alternatively serve at 3.Send DH to bed with her at 1-3 and with glass of something nice in hand stay in the kitchen.

I know it hurts ...but if you stick with it then it won't take long. Just to warn you it's common to have sleep regression around 11 -12 months as there development is a lot around then.

Just wanted to say grown adults share beds they are getting comfort at bedtime from another person so why doesn't society see this as ok for our babies . I think it's sad when it's seen that the baby is a good baby because they can self settle and sleep alone .Wanting comfort does not make a baby bad.

No one has said your baby is bad!

Eh ,if baby can get to sleep in a pram why not just bring the pr and put him down in it??

*bring the pram

You are being quite silly about this now. Not one person has said your baby is bad or you should leave them to cry.

I just made an observation that someone who replied commented on what a good baby she had beings they can self soothe.

The thread is boring . What started off as a quick oh can I just ask what do you guys do for main event dinner ? Have with baby or without ?turned into lots of people telling me to crack on with sleep training in time for Xmas and nursery.anyway like I said it's boring so I'm not commenting on here again.

You can get a travel cot for under £30. It's a worthwhile investment for things like this.

In all honesty I would think it's a little rude to disappear off upstairs for 2 hours unless its absolutely necessary (although I understand the appeal of getting some quiet time for yourself )

DD's first Christmas (8 months) she had a small lunch at midday ish then went upstairs for her nap. She woke up just as we were finishing our main course and sat in the high chair and ate a tiny portion of Christmas dinner with us.

DD's second Christmas, we were both getting over the flu. I don't really remember the day at all! I've got my fingers crossed for this coming Christmas being our first where DD gets to fully join in with Christmas dinner.

Do whatever you want. You are the only one who knows whether they will be annoyed if you disappear for 2 hours or not. We don’t know them.

Just wanted to say grown adults share beds they are getting comfort at bedtime from another person

Grown adults in relationships - I don’t still cuddle up with my mum or sister when I visit them. Grown adults also tend to sleep at the same time - I don’t ask my DH to come join me ‘for comfort’ when if I decide to have an afternoon snooze. So I really don’t think it’s comparable. I think co-sleeping is great if that’s what people are happy with - but I think there is a difference between choosing to co-sleep and actually not having much of a choice because DC won’t sleep any other way and then not being able to make plans because of this.

@Pinkblueberry I just don't get the urgency to get babies to self settle. I rock him to sleep then just put him next to me in the bed and I relax then aswell. If I was to come downstairs I'd just be relaxing anyway so what's the difference . Like I say if I'm next to him I can re settle him if he stirs or wants dummy. When my family have looked after baby they just sit quietly next to him too ( when he has been in pram) so they will sit on a chair near by and can just rock the pram half way if he wakes. I don't see the issue

@Pinkblueberry I compare to grown adults as I actually had a conversation with a friend who cannot get to sleep when husband works away . Obviously it's a diff Rene relationship but I never would look down on here and say how dare you not be able to sleep without him in the bed

If you don’t see the issue with sitting next to him while he sleeps on Christmas Day then just do it!