Would you sleep with your friend ? ( Not like that )

[VictoriaBun]

My friend and I have booked a coach trip which is a show and an overnighter in a hotel. This was arranged a good few months ago. My friend booked and I paid her.
We are due to go on a few weeks. Chatting about it last night she mentioned we are in a double room. I had assumed we would be in a twin.
I of course am not worrying anything would happen , but am also perhaps a bit about it.
Would you happily share a bed with your friend ? ( I have never shared a bed before, even as a child with a sister , cousin or friend ) only dh or dc.

Yeah I wouldn’t have a problem. I’ve shared with friends and family before.

I would but not out of choice. Have done in the past. But I’m 50 now. I like my own space - apart from with DD who comes in sometimes but then she is only 8. I’m sure she won’t be coming in in a few years time.

No problem at all

Yes of course

I agree it’s not unusual for most people but it would be a issue for me as I don’t like to share a bed with anyone. But easily resolved - my mum had booked a hotel room for a night and it was decided at a later date that I would join her. We just contacted the hotel and asked to switch the booking from double to twin. They couldn’t guarantee but they noted the preference and on the day it was a twin. Why don’t you just do that OP?

HerrenaHarridan don't you have any non sexual friendships with people who don't want to cuddle you in bed? I can't really see what being poly has to do with it unless every single one of your friends is poly too ...

Yes I have several times with a close friend

Nah. Bars not the same at all.

Well no obviously, that's what's great about them - late night conversation in the bar then go and enjoy the luxury of a room and bed to yourself for once in a blue moon, and don't worry about snoring/ talking in your sleep, get up to pee if you need to, get dried in the bedroom rather than steamed up bathroom without trying not to flash, generally be comfortable...

I had to share a single bed with my mate last year! 🤣 we're not exactly small either 🙈

Does she realise that a double room won't have two single beds in it? It's not something you'd know automatically if you've not booked rooms before.

Just explain how dreadful a fidgeter you are and ask her to request whether the room can be changed.

I don't care if my friends snore and fart! We just laugh. Same goes for flashing etc but I'm not overly bothered about things like that or going for a wee etc.

I've shared a bed with most of my female friends and some of my male friends. It's not a big deal.

I would if there was no other option but I wouldn’t be thrilled. I’d rather check if there was a way to swap to a twin or even price up a second room first.

Nope. I'm too old for that, I like my own space. I have done in the past to make cheaper but I'd rather pay the extra now

Nope. I don't do sharing beds or even rooms. Except with DH. I'm old, I need my privacy, I toss & turn at night & I snore.

Depends on the friend. I have a close male friend that I travel with a lot, and we platonically share a double bed a lot of the time. But sharing with someone new would probably make me feel a bit awkward initially.

Haha to the poster that suggested my statement ' sleeping with ' . Would you prefer laying down, closing our eyes and going into a semi conscious state with moments of r.e.m ? 😄😄
Ah well it seems most of you are fine with this, so I guess I'll just get on with it !

No.
Wouldn't share a room either. IBS.

No, really wouldn't work for me, but I know I am weird

@Notnowmaybleater

I do have friends who I bed share with and don’t cuddle with and friends who I don’t bedshare with.

Being poly is relevant because it forces you to actually address relationship boundaries rather than assume them. When deciding who I will share a bed with it becomes important to discuss wether they like to cuddle or not, how their partners would feel about it (I won’t bedshare with friends who wouldn’t be honest about it with their partners for instance)

In this example the i think it’s unreasonable of ops friend to assume bedsharing is ok.
That’s something you needs specific consent for in my opinion even if there is a financial cost being filled by only one party

I've shared a bed with cousins/friends at sleepovers since being young so it's normal to me. On the odd occasion I've topped and tailed in a single bed with a friend and going myself three in a row with friends in a double too

Nope. I wouldn't be able to sleep as I'd feel uncomfortable. The only people I'd ever be comfortable sharing a bed with are my Mum, my Kids when I have them and my Significant Other. Back in the day, when they were alive, I was fine sharing with my grandmothers too as a child and teen.

I can't explain it but I feel a bit ick about sharing with a friend, female or male. Maybe it's because I never shared a bed with siblings?

Oh God and lovers and kids aside, I would freak the hell out if they attempted to cuddle me (nausea not envy). Nope, nope, nope.

You’ve NEVER shared a bed?! How?!

Sorry I totally get that’s possible really, I just find it very surprising.

I’m the eldest of 3 siblings and a stupid no of cousins so I’ve spent most of my bloody life bed sharing whether I wanted to or not! 😂

Worst was when visiting grandparents and us 3 sibs and 2 cousins sharing a bed but one of the cousins was a murderously restless sleeper at the time and we all woke next day bruised!

But mostly it was fun for us, with very little sleep happening. There’s one photo an uncle took of a mash of us cousins asleep the following morning with a then toddler sleeping across the heads of 3 of us older ones, bum firmly in my brothers face! 😂

Then dd co-slept with us/me a good while until about 4 yo most nights then gradually less and less but often in with me at weekends falling asleep watching a movie or Netflix till she was 12/13 but then I had to bump her from doing it cos she’s a bugger for hitting and kicking in her sleep! She had her first serious/regular boyfriend last year and he ended up refusing to stay in same bed for actual sleeping most nights as he was getting bruised to hell! Poor sod!

As an adult I’ve shared with friends on many occasions, men (people I’ve known since we were little kids) and women platonically with no problems unless eg they were a snorer.

One friends hen there were 4 of us in one bed cos due to drunken mucking about earlier the bride and maid of honour had broken brides bed! (Only a couple slats but we weren’t sober enough to fix that night) we just blethered till we all fell asleep it’s actually a really lovely memory.

I wouldn’t have a problem with this at all but I can understand why you’re feeling uncomfortable. But honestly take cosy pjs (in case they’re a duvet hog I hate being cold) and earplugs (in case they snore/talk in sleep) and you’ll be fine.

“We usually just ask for 2 duvets.” Oh good idea!