What to buy for husband’s ninety year old nan?

[Spinzy]

My husband’s nan will turn ninety this year and we have absolutely no idea what to buy her. Her birthday is only a few weeks before Christmas so we have a double whammy of ‘no idea what to get’.

She doesn’t drink, she doesn’t particularly like chocolate or sweets or anything rich and is generally quite content and set in her ways with things she already owns. We’ve resorted to buying her toiletries in the past but don’t know whether she even used them. We bought a cashmere scarf another year but have never seen her using it. Last year we bought a potted up basket of winter plants for the garden which she seemed to quite like, but she isn’t particularly into gardening. She leads quite a simple life and doesn’t really like a fuss. She would never tell us she doesn’t like the gifts we’ve bought.

Any good ideas? We always think we’d like to buy her a luxurious little treat sort of item but everything we think of is discounted for some reason.

How about a lovely blanket or throw?

Does she like to read? A good book (or two) might be appreciated. With Dh's mum, she reached an age where her eyesight had deteriorated so badly that she couldn't read, so we bought her a CD player and some audio books.

How about some alpaca wool socks? DH bought me some recently and they are The. Best. Thing. Ever.

heated blanket?

Could you take her out for high tea or a pub lunch? I have several elderly relatives and that always goes down well.
Don't do dinner as their digestion often won't handle a big meal late, and in fact don't do a big meal. My nan (99) prefers to order a child's portion so we always pick somewhere to accommodate this.

Does she live independently? I paid for a gardener for my 88 year old nan's birthday present, to come and cut her grass every couple of weeks and do other tidying up in the garden that she was struggling to do herself. If she's not interested in gardening, but has a garden, this may be a good gift?

radox herbal bubble bath

if eyesight going:
magnifying glass
phone with large buttons
clock with large numbers / speaking clock

nice framed photo of your family

a book of old pictures from when she was young (eg villages in the 30s or London in the 30s)

a record / CD / cassette tape of wartime music

One of those little digital photo frames and pre load it with family images.

A nice dressing gown? A houseplant? Reading lamp (Ikea have a good range at good prices)? Framed picture or artwork of something with meaning for her?

I’ve also paid for a gardener and done afternoon tea

Tbh, my elderly relatives seem to much more enjoy spending time with family rather than material gifts so an afternoon out seems to fit the bill well

I was going to say cashmere house / bed socks. (Similar time a PP’s alpaca socks).
So lovely and luxurious.

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At 90 I really doubt she wants things ie toiletries or scarves and probably has a cupboard of blankets by 90.

Wouldn’t an afternoon tea/high tea (Nan could eat as much or as little as she liked) with you and dh or just your DH be a nice idea?

Family photo in a nice silver frame?

How’s her mobility and do you have dc? If mobility is ok what about a trip to the zoo with the dc

What about consumables? A nice tin of biscuits or hamper from a fancy shop like fortnum and mason or a nice teacup and tea set?

We have an 88 yr old. She liked my handmade shopper bag so much I gave it to her (Originally I used it like a stocking for other things but she took a fancy to it) its smaller than usual but long handles but she finds it good as she doesn't need anything too big or too long as she is only about 4 ft 10 these days. If you can find some little ladies hankies, purse, leather or warm gloves, winter scarf, slippers (buy proper shoe like ones with hard soles to prevent falls), nice light cardigan to slip on wither during day or evening when in bed, we often get her kettles (odd but small capacity for her stove top nrather than electric - we are still trying to get it right and we are on kettle no 3 and hopefully the last one!! lol). The other odd request I had from her was wooly knee high socks, came out of a random convo about how her legs get cold but she has to be careful with the electic fire etc (Yes my eye brows went up and I have an eye on replacing that ...) She also likes books and I raid good charity bookshops for as new second hand as well as the book store, have also bought on line too. I have a good quality second hand silver photo frame and it will get a piccie in it. I have also done nice fine bone china tall mugs which she likes, pack of minty sweets, box of shortbread biccies or tea cakes which is one of her favourites

HTH

MIL is also going to be 90 this year (NYE so I feel your pain). We normally get her a bracelet - she loves jewellery, a cuddly toy, a puzzle, a house plant, picture of the kids...

I once gave her a 'Mr T in my Pocket' which she loves pressing when the care staff come around (it says 'don't give me no back talk sucker!' 😂).

MIL in bed in a care home and has aphasia etc due to stroke, otherwise a trip out would be fab.

My gran is 90 next year, we're having a huge party, but I've not thought about gifts yet. She lives reading, but a book for her 90th isn't quite enough iykwim (and cataracts hinder things).

What about an audio book.

I forgot the other great thing my nan loves - a kindle, she can change the size of the type to suit and I download a bunch of books at a time at my house for her from my account because she doesn't have wifi. She found library books were getting hard because the print was too small, even on large print books.

I also bought her a device that attaches to her phone so she can hear it ringing wherever she is in the house, she was struggling to hear the phone before.

What about a nice wrap?

audio books are fab.

I used to always make my nan a winter bedding flower box for outside.
I’d go around, spend the day with her and do it with my kids.
I also did the same on mother’s day with the spring bedding. She had the best outdoor flowers in her road!
Love the idea of the digital frame too.
I miss my nan

My grandmother turned 90 last year. My (v large) family were in the same situation. What to give her is even more difficult when she lives in a care home and has all her needs met!

In the end I made a photo book for her, with photos from all the family over the years. Starting with her as a baby, then moving onto her wedding, the birth of her children, then grandchildren.

In all it ended up being amazing (even if I do say so myself! ) and we all enjoyed reminiscing over it at the party. Apparently grandma showed it to everyone in the care home - multiple times!

Photo album is a great idea, we did it for our gran's 90th. We also put in old photos ( we found online ) of how the high street used to be in 19canteen....loads of memories and stories about things to buy and the woman who ran the wool shop!

@RoxanneMonke was just coming in to say the same! I did that for my grandads 80th and went down really well.