Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Nanny: advice sought

34 replies

PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 18/10/2019 10:36

Dear MNetters

We are needing to appoint a nanny and where we are the options are v v v thin on the ground.

There’s one agency and they’ve paired us with one girl who seems fine but I don’t know if we’re “settling”.

Those of you who have nannies how did you know she (or he) was the one and what things do I need to ask?

OP posts:
PippaPug · 18/10/2019 10:43

I’m a Nanny, can you give a few examples? Just so people can help better.

It can take 8/12 weeks to settle into a nanny job from experience - not sure how long the family believes it takes the Nanny to settle in however.

Depends on the age of the children - if they are going through separation anxiety it can be harder for Child/Parent/Nanny too

PrimeraVez · 18/10/2019 10:47

I think you just have to give her a go - be clear that there is a trial period (for both parties)

I wasn’t bowled over by our nanny at first (although she had all the right qualifications, experience and came highly recommended) but within a few weeks of her being with us, my youngest was sick and she was absolutely amazing with him.

Now we’re nearly 4 years on, and she is absolutely part of the family.

Original poster
PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 18/10/2019 10:51

Ok so the children are 3, 2 and 6months.

Nanny would be doing three full days.

We have a weird situation where I’m back to work earlier than anticipated meaning we have to make a decision soon.

Nanny we have seen seems to think our plan of going to playgroups in the morning and having low key afternoons at home is good.

But even though she’s got experience of looking after more than two children at one time I’m not sure she’s got the confidence nor obvious enjoyment of working with kids - things you can pick up on from how someone talks about their previous roles.

I dunno, we are not looking for Mary Poppins but you know when your gut is saying “nuh-uh”? That’s kind of where I am.

And it’s not like I’m not used to others looking after them, they’re in nursery two days a week (the older ones).

There’s just something “missing” I can’t work out

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Childcare & nursery Families
PippaPug · 18/10/2019 11:11

Tricky one, do you have a problem with playgroups in the morning and then low key afternoons?

Can you trial it for 6/8 weeks and see how it goes?

mankyfourthtoe · 18/10/2019 11:56

Has she got recommendations.

karmakameleon · 18/10/2019 12:18

I say go with your gut instinct. Nanny agency fees are expensive and you don’t want to pay lots for a nanny that you aren’t happy with.

karmakameleon · 18/10/2019 12:20

Have you tried www.childcare.co.uk? We’ve found some really good nannies on there.

Original poster
PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 18/10/2019 13:00

do you have a problem with playgroups in the morning and then low key afternoons?

No, no not at all, it’s the best way as they get all their super mental fun time between 9 and 11.30 meaning two will nap and the other will just zone out in front of Moana.

@karmakameleon I’ve heard good things about Childcare.co.uk but our local council only recognises the one nanny agency meaning we won’t get any childcare funding. Plus we can’t run the risk of nanny getting pregers as we can’t afford the contingency for mat leave. I would never ever want to be in a position of having to even consider letting someone go for that, it’d be morally and legally wrong. But we’d be fucked.

Hence the agency.

Argh I hate this.

OP posts:
karmakameleon · 18/10/2019 13:12

Then you need to tell the agency to send you other candidates. They must have more than one nanny available.

Original poster
PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 18/10/2019 13:23

Not for a 30 hour contract they don’t

Honestly, getting a nanny up here is as rare as hens teeth, and it’s doing my head in.

OP posts:
clickymad · 18/10/2019 13:27

Plus we can’t run the risk of nanny getting pregers

Wow. Very uncool. I'm an ex nanny and sympathise with how difficult it must be but nannies are just as allowed as other people to get pregnant. Hmm

NannyR · 18/10/2019 13:37

I don't understand what you mean about the pregnancy issue - you are responsible for paying maternity pay regardless of how you get your nanny in the first place, whether you use an agency or advertise independently you are still an employer with employers responsibilities.

CloudPop · 18/10/2019 14:38

Does your council fund your nanny?

similarminimer · 18/10/2019 14:49

I think you may be confused (as well as morally up the spout) about may pay. You have to administer it as the employer but the money is from the government.

mankyfourthtoe · 18/10/2019 15:11

Could you do a childminder instead

stealthbanana · 18/10/2019 15:14

I don’t understand your funding/mat leave points at all.

But to answer your original question - if your gut is saying no you should not hire her. No way.

Original poster
PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 18/10/2019 16:25

If you are the nanny’s direct employer you are responsible for the administration of pay, benefits, etc. That includes mat pay. I’ve known two folk who’ve had nannies who’ve got pregnant and it’s not worked, for a host of reasons.

Hiring via an umbrella agency means they take care of pay, benefits and provide continuity of care if your nanny goes off long term sick or on maternity.

Outside England (or just London?) it is the local authority that is responsible for funding for the childcare of children from 2 or 3+. If you’re not registered with an agency that’s recognised and thus directly employing your nanny independent you don’t quality for funding.

As we aren’t rolling in it and want above anything else continuity for the children that’s why we need to use an umbrella agency. There’s one and virtually nobody available.

And therein lies the rub.

BTW @clickymad if you read what I’ve written you’ll see that’s exactly why I’m using an agency. Perhaps I’ve failed to mention the word “umbrella” but don’t throw stones.

OP posts:
stealthbanana · 18/10/2019 16:28

What does continuity of care mean? They will just find another nanny, no?

I mean, if you need a nanny and you have to use this particular agency and there is only one nanny available then you don’t have a choice. So what’s your question?

Original poster
PaulHollywoodsSexGut · 18/10/2019 16:36

You know what? I don’t know anymore

OP posts:
NannyR · 18/10/2019 16:43

I've worked as a nanny for a long time now and used several agencies to find jobs but they've always just acted as an introduction between nanny and parents, the parents are your employers, not the agency. Is this a new thing, I've never come across umbrella agencies before?

AbbyHammond · 18/10/2019 16:48

Are you sure you've understood correctly that the agency will be the nanny's employer, not you?

MrsL2016 · 18/10/2019 16:57

The government provide the childcare funding and tax free childcare, not the council. As long as your nanny is ofsted registered it shouldn't matter what the council prefer surely? Also as PP said the government pay SMP so you wouldn't paying if your nanny gets pregnant.

clickymad · 18/10/2019 16:59

I've both been a nanny and run a couple of agencies. I've never heard of an agency being the employer. Not one.

AbbyHammond · 18/10/2019 16:59

That's in England @MrsL2016. Op could be in Scotland.

AbbyHammond · 18/10/2019 17:00

And although govt pay smp, the employer has to pay accrued holiday.