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To think my ds is spoiled and not know how to reverse it.

54 replies

miagerbies · 12/10/2019 15:52

My ds is 9. He has no concept of the value of things. I can tell him that a computer game he wants is £45, and that's a lot, but he cannot seem to grasp exactly how much of "a lot" that is to me.

He was desperate for a Nintendo Switch, told me how all the other kids had one. I felt bad, so I worked a load of overtime, and saved for 3 months to buy him one. He was thrilled, at the time, but now it seems that switch games are all he wants. My dmil, his stepgm, bought him a supermario teddy for his birthday, and he was just disappointed that it wasn't a switch game. The other day, he asked if we sold all his other teddies and toys, could we use the money for a game? Like they mean nothing to him now. He used to adore his teddies.

His dad and I are divorced, he was our only child and he is also the only gchild on both sides, so he is basically worshipped by his family. I really worry that he isn't growing up to to be a nice person. He has 2 stepbrothers who are spoilt rotten by their dm and given computer games a few times a month, I know he's jealous and has asked me why can't be richer like his stepbrothers dm.

How can I make him show and feel some appreciation for all the wonderful things he does have? I feel so out of my depth with him sometimes.

OP posts:
pikapikachu · 12/10/2019 17:41

"everybody else has one" is the oldest trick in the book.

Has he tried selling his old games? Selling the teddies is a great idea too. Make sure he does the work (photographing, writing the ad, packing etc)

Zaphodsotherhead · 12/10/2019 17:46

The trouble with saying that you should sell his teddies and soft toys is that I suspect he believes that he will get hundreds of pounds for these and will inevitably be disappointed at the 20p per item you may (or may not) get at a car boot sale.

I think he imagines he can buy loads of games for the cost of selling his toys, when the reality is that he'll be lucky to raise enough to buy a comic. He may be thinking that he'll get 'new' prices for his toys.

BrendasUmbrella · 12/10/2019 18:56

The other day, he asked if we sold all his other teddies and toys, could we use the money for a game? Like they mean nothing to him now. He used to adore his teddies.

That's not spoiled behaviour. It's quite mature actually. A nine year old is a bit old for teddy's, so he's thinking logically, to sell them to get money for something he does want. Adults do it all the time. I understand why you have a sentimental attachment to his toddler toys, but if he's aged out that's not something to be upset about.

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Fizzypoo · 12/10/2019 19:05

I do pocket money tied to chores. They get a fiver a week for washing up and drying up each night and one sorts cleans clothes into piles and one runs the vacuum round once a week.

They can earn extra by doing extra chores too.

There's nothing wrong with a bit of incentive for helping out. Plus look at all the threads around about useless older DC.

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