Creepy neighbour

[JackieD0509]

Hi, i’m not sure if i’m posting in the right place but just wanted some advice.

I live on my own with my little dog and the back of my house looks onto the back of another row of houses, i’ve notice something strange the last few weeks from one of the bedroom windows of one of the houses.

During the day the window of this house always has the curtains closed fully however come nighttime the curtains always have a slight gap between them, the tv is usually on in this room and the light on (i can see this from my living room window).

This in itself seems totally innocent however i notice if i go into my kitchen or bedroom and turn the light on this neighbour turns off their lights and TV(i’m assuming they do this so they can lurk at the window in darkness), when i turn the lights back off the neighbour turns back on their TV and lights.

I thought this was strange so just kept mindful of this and kept having the odd glance at their window, on occasion i can see the outline of someone stood watching me. I decided to try and see whether this was just me being paranoid and decided to make it obvious to the person that i could see them, this is when the figure quickly moved away from the window which confirms my suspicions that i’m being watched by him.

Tonight i tried to get a picture of this, i went upstairs and turned the bedroom light on and watched from downstairs and as i thought the lights went out in their window, stupidly i forgot to turn off the flash on my phone and it spooked him and they moved rather quickly from the window which made it alot easier for me to see that someone was there.

My question is should i be worried about this? How likely is it to escalate to full stalking? He could have been watching me for months and it worries me because I regularly leave my backdoor open for the dog and he would obviously know this after watching me for so long.

@PixieDustt
I’m going to the police station tomorrow to see what they say as it’s definitely concerning and i’d be curious to know what they suggest.

As for an alarm it’s highly unlikely that the landlord would do this to be honest.

Thanks for your suggestions. :) the tinted windows sound like a good idea however i just don’t want to push him to do anything more extreme.

@funkylittleboatrace
I think this would make me more likely to be scared off lol

Ah, don’t you miss the good ol’ days of village community life. When you could send the vicar round to his for a quiet (shaming) word, and when that didn’t work you sent around your brother and his mates to have a less quiet word. Just enough to focus this guy’s mind on his future, and dissuade him from his creepy hobby.

Frankly, there’s probably still a way to do this in modern life. I’d likely invite my middle-aged mum girlfriends around for a drink, then walk them around to his front door for a chat. Nothing like a chorus of cross tipsy women in full ‘mum voice’ to put the fear of God into a random perve. For extra effect, tell him you know his mum.

Not to make light of a worrying situation, OP. But I really would come out fighting, rather than cower.

@DerbyRacer
Thanks for sharing your experience. This is the kind of thing i’m worried about if i block my windows etc, it may push him to be more extreme. I am going to my local police station tomorrow to discuss this. Thank you :)

@Skittlesandbeer
Yes definitely, i’ve had loads of suggestions and i’m going to go into the police tomorrow and see what they say. If i lived with someone it wouldn’t be too bad and i would fight more but because i’m on my own it’s a bit more concerning and i don’t want to push matters further.
Thank you

I just remembered a colleague told us someone was watching her, she went to local police. It was the opposite neighbour and he seemed to be staring at her during that heatwave...! So she reported and I think they had a word. She's not in my section so I don't see her often.

Thanks everyone for your help! I’ve had loads of suggestions that i wouldn’t have thought of so am looking into the best options. I’m also going to pop into my local police station tomorrow and just see what can be done.

@JackieD0509 what did the police say?

Were they supportive?

Hope you sort out this creep soon. I have something similar. My ‘creepy’ neighbour keeps peeking over my fence, my other neighbors seen him stand on a pair of steps! I’m going to put up a huge sign saying hello creepy neighbour, police have been informed. He apparently drove the previous owner out she had alarms and locks on all windows and doors and chains on all internal doors. Poor woman.

WTF is wrong with people? it like older men's collective sense of entitlement is at a crises point. Just imagine the police coming around becaue youve been staring at somebody?