What is the most awful food you have eaten?

[leaserspottedmummybird]

Just that really.
Dp once made burgers bulked out with weetabix that were vile and ended up in the bin🤮 and also a slow cooker beef and veg stew with water and no stock.
I once made a Chinese tofu vegan dish from an American cookbook that looked like cat 🐈 sick and also went straight into the bin without a taste( brave dp tasted it and said it was ok)

I also made a tuna lasagne from a budget cookbook that was rank.

I once made a lamb stew and had the brilliant idea of adding barley into it. The problem was that I put so much barley in it ended up like a savoury porridge with lamb in it. It was absolutely vile.

I think that sounds quite nice, actually.

I once tried to make pickled onions from a handwritten foreign family recipe which was translated for me.

I suspect the dried mint was a mistranslation. It looked like eyeballs floating in algae and tasted worse (I imagine). The smell was something else too.

High on my list is every piece of goats cheese I’ve ever tried. People are for ever saying “this one isn’t goaty at all, you should try it” and every time it tastes like something scraped off the floor of a goat pen.

Similarly, I hate porridge because of the texture, I love the taste of oats. “Oh, try my porridge, it’s not slimy at all” they say. Every single time it’s a spoon of grey slime; with or without milk, cream, honey, sugar, fruit, made with rolled oats, fine oatmeal, organic hand ground oatmeal, whatever basically porridge is slime.

Yep andouillette, ordered as a crepe filling in Brittany. It was absolutely vile and I made DH swap his with me. DH eats anything but even he struggled.

Durian fruit. Taste like vomit. Repeated on me when I brushed my teeth later. Made me vomit. Never again.

Poutine.
Never again!

Salt cod in Portugal. It was so smelly, I was pregnant and really nauseous. I don't like fish but the only alternatives were meat and I liked meat even less!
The waiter wouldn't leave me alone, circling and asking what was wrong. not envy.

A crab stick.

Boiled potatoes in hospital, they were all different, one was soft, one could have broken a window and one was like a bouncy ball, I devised I’d have the chicken thing that accompanied it, cut it open and some ice slid out...yum

A chicken mayo salad from a local corner shop (bought in by them, not prepared there.)

Was well within the use by date but the mayo looked weird. Convinced myself it was fine because of the date on it. Not even an hour later I was throwing up constantly with the worst stomach cramps ever and ended up ill in bed for days.

I'm really adventurous with food and would try anything so it's typical that it's something boring that did that to me.

Another one for andouilette and tripe (much the same thing). Both smell and taste of shit. I am not fussy and will happily eat foie gras, seafood, rabbit etc.

I was served scaly looking tripe in a vile brown sauce on a French exchange with the whole large family looking on to see how much I would enjoy it . Luckily, it was served with lots of frites, all of which I devoured in order to swallow the mouthful I ate and not bring it up. They were very kind and offered me some ham instead.

Some kind of weird spiky tube shaped green vegetable in Malaysia. The people we were with ordered if especially to see if I'd like it. It was like eating a tub of cocktail sticks and I wish I knew what it was called.

I've never eaten chicken's feet but was a bit disturbed out when I stirred a curry and one floated up to the top. I kept my cool but it did put me off my seconds.

I have a fairly long list of shockers from childhood but the worst was definitely liver.

My mum used to buy cow's liver - big slabs of it, then fry the fuck out of it and it was like trying to chew leather with massive veins in it. Still makes me a gag a bit now just typing this out.

One of the others that still makes me gag now was overcooked marrow. Pale green, fibrous mush - holy moly that was so bad. I did retch once and got a wallop for being so ungrateful when there were starving children in Africa!!!!!

Tripe.... over-cooked, with my grandmother’s lumpy, flavourless “white sauce” (it was really grey) with dried parsley at least a billion years old sprinkled on top for decoration.

A relative once fed me shark as a dc. I was upset.
Can't remember the actual taste but the idea horrified me..

Kidney.
Durian
Lactose free baby milk.

I like andouillettes:)

Tripe, in Italy. Vile.

Tripe - anywhere - vile. I’ve never had it but mum used to cook it for the dogs (and liver) 🤢

It's a toss up between Smalahove (sheer horror on the visuals), lutefisk (horror on the texture), and Surstrømming (horror on EVERYTHING - do not open the can indoors, it'll be the worst mistake you ever make). Scandinavia has some weird ideas.

My grandmother was a wonderful nan, but my god she was a terrible cook.

As a child, I spent more Sundays than I care to remember sneaking to the toilet to spit out mouthfuls of her roast dinners. She would cook a joint of beef until it was so dry you could have re-soled your shoes with it. Potatoes cooked until they were rock hard and so greasy you'd have puddles of grease floating on top of your gravy. Vegetables boiled to mush. Vile.

Kidney casserole, kidneys suspended in warm grey phlegm would be a more accurate description
Not food but drinking coconut water was like drinking someone else's saliva

gag

Another vote for goat. It tastes absolutely disgusting. I was in rural Turkey and I thought the meat was chicken. All the goats prancing around in the fields should have given me a clue. All the goats watched me as I spat out the meat into a tissue- I was probably eating a family member.

I've never eaten durian fruit itself but I have eaten durian flavoured sweets. They tasted like the farts of someone who has overdosed on onions.

The spinach casserole was still worse.

An egg mayonnaise sandwich from a well known high street bakery. It tasted like someone had garnished it with perfume.

They tasted like the farts of someone who has overdosed on onions. Brilliant description!