Outraged at what I've seen! My blood is boiling. Disabled boy mimicked

[coffeeandapastry]

Hi,

So this actually happened yesterday afternoon..

My DD and I went to watch the new Dora film (could have done with a few GnTs to get me through that, but that's another story) and we had allocated seats. I noticed a boy and his mum or sister, sat in one of our seats, but because the cinema was quite quiet, I certainly wasn't going to make an issue out of it, plus I noticed the boy had some form of mental and physical disability.

Anyway, we get to the end of the film (thank goodness!!) and we get up and leave. We are walking behind the boy and his mum/sister and it's clear that he has issues with his mobility. He is walking unaided, but needs quite a bit of guidance. I also notice that he had quite a severe skin condition and he is scratching himself a lot. My heart goes out to him.

As we come out of the cinema, into the carpark, I notice a couple of teenagers- 15 or 16 I'd say and they looked as though they were a couple. The boy and his mum/sister walk past them and my first thought was, 'that's something really good about this generation, kids are generally kinder with this kind of thing', but seconds later, I see the teen boy walk behind the other boy, copying his walk and scratching his arms, also making a sort of zombie noise The girl he is with bursts into fits of laughter and my arms go numb with rage. I stood next to my car and just eyeballed them until the boy got into the car, as I didn't want to draw any attention to what had just happened whilst he or his mum/sister were around. I walk over and asked if I actually just saw what I thought I saw and they both went completely silent and put their heads down. Hopefully that indicates shame as well as embarrassment. I told him that his behaviour was disgusting and he should be ashamed and walked back to my car.

On the drive home, as the anger started to subside, I felt so sad. Sad that kids still do this and they weren't even kids really. How can they not see that this boys life is hard enough without being mimicked and laughed at ffs! I had a few tears when I got back, because I was so incredibly sad and disappointed.

My DD was telling me in the car that someone spat at a boy in her year who has ASD and told me things like that happen all the time. Maybe I was being naive. I know there will always be teasing and bullying and not just with kids, but I really didn't think this sort of behaviour was that common anymore. I honestly thought we'd moved on.

Sorry, not sure why I'm posting. Probably just needed to vent.

I feel as though I need my faith restoring tbh.

But as humans we have evolved purely through survival of the fittest. On some level our brains are genetically wired for those who are stronger to feel more superior and seek to maintain that genetic superiority.

This is not correct. Humans have not purely evolved through survival of the fittest.
You said you read an academic paper on but it might be an idea to read some Spencer and Darwin

My son is severely autistic, vocally extra loud with noises and flapping, however is completely non verbal .he's a beautiful looking child and people don't see his disability until he shows his behaviours which blow up outside. I constantly get judged and looks ,he's 5 and big but travels in a pram as is a runner and has mental age of 8 months .people need to be kinder, this mothers heart breaks with every dirty look.it's a big deal even getting out of our house.

Not only did you stand up to bullies but you showed your dd how to stand up to them. Well done. If we all do this when it's safe to do so our DC will learn from us. I hate bullies. OP never lose your empathy, its refreshing.

Thank you OP. From someone who worries about this sort of thing on a daily basis, thank you. If everyone who saw cruel mockery of disabilities stood up to bullies the world would be a better place.

Still can't believe some of what I'm reading.

I was very proud of my dd actually. She was obviously angry too and said she'd rather lose friends and stick up for people like that, than go along with it and be really popular.

My heart really goes out to all of you who can relate.

@coffeeandapastry

I was very proud of my dd actually. She was obviously angry too and said she'd rather lose friends and stick up for people like that, than go along with it and be really popular.

This is GORGEOUS. You've obviously been a brilliant mum to have instilled this attitude in her.

As someone who gets shitty comments fairly regularly this makes me really emotional - thank you to you and give her a hug from me. And a for yourself if you fancy or if you don't!

Everyone is (rightly) slagging Trump. But the world seem s to have largely forgotten Obama's equally offensive Special Olympics remarks.

My aspie ds used to be told to go kill himself. We had to pull him out of mainstream education. We went out for a walk the other week and an older couple started shouting that he should be in school. I told them they should be in a care home. I just don't care anymore.

@pottedshrimps- this sort of thing does make you grow a much thicker skin, doesn’t it?

Anyone who stares at my DD gets my stare back. She has always attended a special school and doesn’t see disabilities in others at all, just whether they’re kind, funny, struggling etc.

I wish everyone had her eyes.

Obama apologised; something Trump seems to find impossible to do.

Obama apologised

Oh I’m sure he did when it was pointed out to him that his comments were offensive. But what sort of person would think it an acceptable thing to say in the first place?

So many otherwise sound people have a blind spot about disability.

Thanks OP. This is on behalf of myself as I have epilepsy and sometimes have tonic clinic seizures in public so know how embarrassing it is when people yell out ‘freak’ 🤦‍♀️

"that's what I meant when I said the behaviour is a sign of ignorance/lack of education."

I think some people are just unpleasant arseholes. When my son was younger I saw plenty of educated people move their children away from my son because he behaved differently ( just happily in his own world- not trying to hit anyone or looking upset).

• it very much is genetic instinct for survival of the fittest. Go right back to the earliest cave people and the weakest (mentally and physically) died because they didn't have the ability/wherewithal to go out and hunt and gather. Whereas the stronger people survived.

Actually and more accurately - bollocks. The Neolithic site on Orkney have evidence of disabled people (born without eyes or optic nerves) living to adulthood. Living as well as the other adults at the time. Impossible unless they were looked after by the tribe. So let’s not spout bollocks to justify making fun of disabled people.

As another mother of a disabled child op thank you.

Helpful adults suggest ds doesn’t use aids and helps so no one takes the piss. Apparently that’s more sensible than teaching kids not to take the piss.

Generally when people do this I wish ds’s disability on them. Doesn’t get a good reaction and will get me thumped one day but I also burn with a white hot rage about it.

it's fact. I read a very interesting academic paper on this exact topic recently.

Academics talk bollocks very regularly.

To echo what I said earlier, I honestly don't think it matters what potential theories there are about why this sort of thing happens too often. It's part of our current human nature to stamp out such cruel behaviour.