Have you ever received a present so shity saying thank you made you cringe?

[BlueMoonAndRedNose]

I turn 50 at the beg of Sept. A friend asked to meet me for coffee yesterday and gave me a gift, she asked me not to open it there and then, but she didn't mean to wait for my birthday either.
This friend of mine turned 50 2 years ago and I gave her a stunning Becksondergaard scarf which she has worn a lot, I see her in photos wearing it all the time.
Got home, opened the present, it is a plain little milk jug. No tag on it, no label, looks unused but old, has a small chip on the handle.
I am not usually materialistic but I think that this is a thoughtless present and nothing, or a £5. bottle of wine would have been more appropriate.

@Haworthia regarding your comment about people getting offended by a lack of milk jug etc.
Some neighbours of mine got very sneery at another neighbours house party because they served olives that were already pitted.

A friend made a huge thing about having sent me a lovely birthday present and to look out for it in the post. I ended up having to go and collect it and she was texting every hour, not exaggerating, until I'd got it, and was very eager for me to tell her what I thought.
It was a plastic miniature of Gordon's gin. I'm teetotal due to having been an alcoholic, which she knows.

A box of chocolates that were SEVEN years out of date! That was a colleague who hated me though..,

Let me tell you the story of the Christmas shuttlecock.

I'm the youngest of my siblings and the only adopted one. We had a relative who disagreed with the adoption from day one and never thought I was a proper member of the family. My parents kept her at arms length because of this but she always came at Christmas with presents.

My siblings would receive decent stuff, records etc and I'd get a packet of smarties or an old comic.

When I was 13 she gave me a shuttlecock.

A shuttlecock. Just the one.
I have never played badminton in my life.

For some reason we found the shuttlecock endlessly amusing and spent the Christmas holidays hiding it in each other's beds and coat pockets - it was the early nineties, we didn't have internet and had to make our own entertainment.

Next Christmas I bought my brother a VHS tape (can't remember the film, probably Bill and Ted) and I took the tape out of the box and replaced it with the shuttlecock.
Much amusement ensued on Christmas morning and a tradition was born.

The shuttlecock (slightly worn now but looking pretty good for nearly thirty years old) is given at Christmas in a variety of disguises. We take it in turns and points are awarded for creativeness.

My particular favourite was the year my sister gave me an ornate wooden jewellery box. She'd attached a spring inside and stuck the shuttlecock on the end so when I opened the box...😂

Anyway, sometimes you've just got to find the fun with crap presents.

That’s fab canoe what a lovely family you landed into. Please this year make the shuttlecock your tree topper

It's my turn to gift it to my brother this year and I'm already thinking of a plan!

Hide it in a box of shuttlecocks !

My FIL gave me a plastic bead necklace for Christmas last year from Claire’s accessories, my SIL (as in married to DH’s brother) was given a cheque for £1,000. I know they aren’t fans of mine but it did make me resent hosting them, running around after them for four days and spending hundreds of pounds on food a teeny, weeny bit. Not happening this year! 😂🤣

I would let her know that it's chipped. Presume she is unaware of that . It isn't a good present. It would have been better to give nothing than a chipped jug, imo.

It's difficult when it's a close friend but maybe you set the expectation too high. Expect nothing and you won't be disappointed.

I expected nothing, genuinely, and yet I ended up disappointed because I feel what I was given was worse than nothing, as it was random,meaningless and damaged. For those who think it's a pretty jug, I think so too, but it's chipped, so it won't go on display anywhere.

@carrotsandchocolate "my love language isn't gifts" ooh I love this! I've never heard that expression but it's so clear and hits the nail right on the head.

Neither is mine.
My ex used to give the most amazing beautiful presents; always a joy to receive. However, in hindsight, he was a total dick.
DH isn't very good at presents (not very imaginative). However, every day he shows me how much he values me by his actions. I know which I prefer!
OP, doesn't your friend demonstrate your value to her in other ways, like being there for you in hard times for instance?

Once at work, one of the very young, very pretty girls (20) got a pair of red sequin nipple tassels in the Secret Santa. She was clearly mortified, but when the rest of us had a chat later, none of us admitted to buying them.
We found out much later that another member of staff had bought them. He was a man in his 50s.....

Bloody hell Canoe your family sound brilliant! I’m stunned at the person who felt their shitty point of view had to be repeatedly broadcast in the form of ‘presents’. They sound miserable.

@willywillywillywilly "my love language isn't gifts" ooh I love this! I've never heard that expression but it's so clear and hits the nail right on the head."

Love languages are a thing.
Try this: www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/

Thanks Buzz

The jug itself is alright, but it being unboxed and chipped would offend me to receive it like that.
For a milestone birthday from a lifetime friend this would confuse me and I'd wonder WHY???
If you don't collect jugs or have any interest in them it's very strange and I'd probably laugh and say that it was very random and was it a joke?

Obviously you know her well and can guess her finances are not in desperate measures.

A nice card would have been enough, the strange gift is more of an insult which is a shame.

My husband once received a late birthday card which had been opened after sealing, from one of his childhood friends- inside was two lottery tickets for the previous weekends draw The giver obviously couldn't bear to hand the card over without checking he had won! Unbelievably bold but funny as it made the gift totally pointless.

At Christmas as a teenager my mother invited a nice but ditsy woman. She gave us all small gifts. Mine was a shaker of scented talc - a perfectly fine gift but right on top in big writing so no way could I pretend I hadn’t seen it was the price. She was mortified.
My husband got given some ‘manly’ soap from a friend. It was odd.
I was given a cute stuffed puppy toy from my aunt. I was 24.

I'm vegan and was reconnecting with my estranged sister after years of no contact.
She got me leather gloves for Christmas as
Be said as she handed them over-not great for a vegan eh!
I got her a beautiful vintage blue glass salt and pepper set she'd been cooing over.

It’s a bit odd, to say the least. Very baffling, but then again I don’t get gift giving, I never have. I’ve even turned up at a couple of events and hadn’t thought it would need a gift so ended up giving late with excuses. DC and DP, that’s fine. But I was finding, like yourself, giving out generously and getting crap back. So have stopped with all but two besties. It’s just an exchange anyway, and usually quite awkward at that. I think that you should draw a line now for gifts between you.

@colourlessgreenidea
Hey, somebody has to ask the important questions that no one else was clever enough to think of! hmm

Pity they couldn't be arsed to read the first few posts beforehand.

Pity they couldn't be arsed to read the first few posts beforehand.

Yes, obviously my sarcasm needed to be signposted more grandly.

Yes, obviously my sarcasm needed to be signposted more grandly.

No clearly mine did, as I was agreeing with you! 😂

A pack of dish cloths from in-laws. My DH got a bottle of his favourite drink. I still had drawer full of all the previous dish cloths they'd given me because I'm clearly not cleaning as often as they expect.

For my 30th birthday, from a friend, a book called "Why You Can't Find Mr Right – And How to Help Him Find You". (The jist: be less picky and lower your standards!) I carried that gift around in my rucksack for two weeks (travelling round Spain) before opening it on my birthday and immediately binning it.

No clearly mine did, as I was agreeing with you!

🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ 😂😂

I once got a box of ancient looking bath cubes from an elderly (but wealthy) Aunt who lived nearby. Upon closer inspection I saw a raffle ticket taped to the bottom of the box. Then, when I opened it up I found a gift card which said 'to Anne, thanks for all your hard work this year, love Barbara'. Anne is my DM's best friend and Barbara is her employer. The bath cubes had evidently been going round our village for a while. I put them straight back in a tombola so they're probably still circulating somewhere.....