On hols and sobbing in car

[thisnamechanger]

Just need a vent really MN pals.

Am on lovely holiday with DP which I've looked forward to for ages. We come to this place because we can both do our hobby (we take it turns while the other sunbathes or just watches).

Sitting in car while DP does his turn sobbing due to anxiety. Not about anything in particular. Just random, topic-hopping anxiety. It. RUINS. Everything.

I literally worry about everything and anything, all the time. If I catch myself not worrying about something, my brain quickly magics something up. Does anyone else get that?? It's so frustrating and tiring. I want to punch myself in the face for being such an ungrateful idiot but sometimes I think anxiety makes life not worth living. I feel like a very tearful and tired coiled spring.

beta propranolol probably saved my life! I have high anxiety, so I take 2 every morning and then more throughout the day as needed. For me they take the physical symptoms of my anxiety away, which helps me concentrate on shutting up what's in my head.

hugs & help - well, in the very very short term.

Be kind to yourself as best you can.
You are not alone.
This is not your fault.
There is help available - I am touched by all the posters above, sensible advice & kindness.

A worrier here, too.

I’ve had it all my life. I remember waking up one night after a talk about landfill sites being filled up, and crying my eyes out because my Dad worked in that field and a throw away comment had been made about the landfill sites being filled up. Of course, the real reason I was crying probably wasn’t that, it was that I wanted comfort from my parents, and I didn’t get it when I needed it. Which is why I am the way I am.

It makes me convince myself I don’t fit in, it makes me convince myself people are going to cheat on me (although they have...self fulfilling prophecy?)...

You’re not alone. And mostly I can smile and pretend, but Christ, sometimes life is hard being like this.

My son has PTSD with depression and anxiety. The combination of an anti-depressive with Rexulti (brexpiprazole) made a HUGE difference to his anxiety and panic attacks.

It's a relatively new med and here in the US you have to jump through a bunch of hoops to get insurance to pay for it as it's VERY expensive.

I don't know if it's available in the UK, but if it is look into it.

I've had anxiety for years, I totally sympathise. It drains me. I wake up anxious. Like, before I've even opened my eyes, I'm anxious. I had my 2nd child 10 weeks ago and now have PND and postnatal anxiety. It's a bitch. People underestimate how it takes over your life. I have no advice, as I am yet to get a proper grip on it, but just wanted to let you know you're not alone x

That sounds awful, anxiety just takes over sometimes.
Just a thought, are you on the pill? My 'mild' anxiety intensified to the extreme when I went on the mini pill, I turned into a paranoid wreck.
If you're suffering alot and on the pill, its worth looking into. There's recently been links between the pill and severe mental health concerns like extreme anxiety.

Wear yourself out physically. I sometimes get a milder form of what you describe and find that apart from alcohol(which isn't a great idea long term) physical exercise,incl orgasms is the only thing that silences my whirring mind.

Another worrier and anxiety sufferer here. Beta blockers were amazing during my last major anxiety episode and I don't recall any side effects.

I find holidays are a trigger for my anxiety and would happily stay home instead, but that wouldn't be fair on DH or DCs. A compromise for us has been buying a caravan. We can go to new places to keep DH &DCs happy, but I have the security of my own space. Going to the same place for two consecutive years, means I only get stressed about the unknown every other year. Also Google earth helps me get to a know a place better before go.

You can do this, go see a GP as soon as possible and work out a plan that's good for you.

Hugs to you op. I just sobbed for. 2 hours in the park with ds for no reason at all. Ridddiculous but how. I felt.

No advice I'm afraid but I feel your pain. I start counselling next week.

Yoga helps me a lot, especially pranayama (breath practice). Focussing in on my breathing helps take my mind off other things.

Two you could try:

Breathe in for a count of three or four, then out for a count of six or eight - or whatever you can get to, the goal is to extend your out breath to longer than your in breath, not to go into oxygen debt. Work on lengthening and focussing on deep, slow breaths.

Alternate nostril breathing - don’t do this if holding your breath makes you feel panicky though. Take the index finger of your dominant hand and use it to gently close one nostril. Breathe in through the open one, then move your hand to the other side and breathe out through the other nostril. Breathe in through that same nostril, then swap sides and breathe out. In through that same one, swap sides and exhale. Keep going like that, again aiming for deep, slow breaths.

Both of these help me as I have to concentrate on them to the exclusion of other things!

I feel for you op, anxiety is a right bitch.

I have recently been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. It took me a long time to accept that the way I think is bit normal. Things that are helping me so far, cutting all stimulants out of my diet (no coffee or caffeine, very limited alcohol, limiting sugar) and sticking to it, CBT with a therapist (phone and online). Mantras to repeat can also help (I am safe, I am loved) and focusing on relaxing specific muscles to help relax. Good luck.

My GP started me on mirtazapine last year when my anxiety overwhelmed me. I took it for 6 months (and slept like a baby after the first 2 weeks where I just slept!). I came off it due to hunger it was causing and thought I'd have to ask the GP for something different but the breathing exercises and Apps must have stuck with me as I seem to do alright now. As a bonus the phobia I'd had about eating in restaurants since I was about 7 also went. So definitely see your GP and ask about other treatments.

Ah it's a fucker isn't it. Sympathies.
Propanolol landed me in hospital and I haven't dared try it since (blood pressure plummeted) so just be aware it isn't for everyone but it seems to work well for so many others, see what your GP says.

Doesn't anyone else at all do CBT? I'm quite surprised it isn't even mentioned.

Propranolol just seems to take away a lot of the physical symptoms of anxiety for me.

I had CBT a few years ago, but I'm not sure it helped me a lot. I wonder if that was me at the time / counsellor-specific though.

Oh, I'm just reading back a bit - orgasms you say Benjispruce 😄🤔.

My DD takes propranolol, one usually but can take up to 3.
She also uses cbd oil and occasionally Rescue Remedy spray.

OP I suffer from anxiety, but I’m still learning - mine is physical and usually comes about when something is on my mind that I can’t control, but it effects me when I’m not thinking about it if that makes sense. Bit like a subconscious worry.
Meditation works for me and also, training myself to understand that you can’t always control outcomes. So, whether I worry or not, end outcome will be the same, so why bother worrying. Although that only works for me if I’m actively worrying about something. The subconscious thing baffles me.
As I say, breathing techniques, meditating music and clearing thoughts helps.
Good luck, you can win this.

Beta blockers had no huge side effects for me apart from making me feel veeery relaxed (slightly nicely stoned?). Pre beta blockers, I’d worry about something, and normally the adrenaline would kick in and the rush of panic would come, but on these that adrenaline/panic feeling wouldn’t come and I’d stay calm. I got used to them after a couple of weeks, and the mildly stoned feeling wore off, but I still felt super calm. I was on them to reduce my heart rate, so take your gp’s advice there on case it affects your heart rate/blood pressure.

SSRIs again made me feel noticeably calmer after 3/4 weeks, but did affect my vision in the dark. (Saw swirly patterns that were not there in the light, or in reality!) I don’t think that’s a common side effect though.

Have you tried duloxetine? It’s an older antid but it was like switching off the anxiety tap in my head.

Citalopram is working very well for me regarding my anxiety. Proponalol made me put on a stone of weight, I lost it when I stopped taking them.

Propranolol and citalopram changed my life honestly, I was a anxiety mess and no real reason for it but I was constantly thinking the worst for everything and terrible things happening to my daughters but its completely changed me, hopefully you can speak to your doctor and get some help as its crippling sometimes and some people just dont understand

Just to mention that I think some people are talking about propranolol / beta blockers in 2x different ways - either taking them in an ad hoc way, or taking them regularly.

I was prescribed to take them in an ad hoc way (when I was going to be in a situation that induces anxiety in me), and I find them really helpful.

This started during my first pregnancy after baby born full blown panic attacks, agorophobia, my OH had to take me everywhere. Went to GP who said think of your body like a battery everytime you worry you use up seratonin eventually your battery goes flat, the drugs allow you to top up the battery. It was wonderful within three weeks I was getting on buses, heck I could have gone to the moon in a rocket. Fast forward two years it came back, took some anafranil was very sick turned out I was pregnant again which was a surprise to me.

After third child same again so was put on seroxat, which helped so much.

Nowadays I give myself a good talking to when I start to get silly. When I go to bed ear plugs in and listen to netflix which fills my head until I sleep. It never goes away you just learn tricks to cope with it. I did read a book once "Feel the fear and do it anyway" that helped as well. Eating out, well I find a glass of wine helps me to relax.

The bugger that is the menopause gave me hot flashes, palpitations, I thought at first it was back heart consultant put me on a very low dose of beta blocker for that.

In the immediate- try 4, 7, 8 breathing. Breathe in for count of 4. Hold for 7. Breathe out for count of 8. Repeat twice more. Do this as often as you need. Google 4,7, 8 breathing if you want to see a video of it.

In longer term, EMDR is a treatment used for PTSD that I had for anxiety, and it really helped.

Take care.