What has MN taught you?

[Candyfloff]

I've been thinking about this today.

MN has taught me;

• Thinking on a deeper, critical level.
• That some behaviours I previously thought of as annoying and inconsiderate are downright abusive.
• To defend myself.
• That some people on this planet are just nuts.

And of course;

• Sugar is comparable with crack.
• Fabric Conditioner is the devil.
• 'Posh Chocs' exist
• A bath is similar to being a pig wallowing in filth

So what has MN taught you? Any lessons that you'd like to share?

Boundaries
That previous relationships and my childhood were abusive
Feminism
Brexit beyond the headlines
How to keep a store cupboard well stocked for times of hardship brexit thank you @bellinisurge
Male entitlement
Irish history
Peak trans'd

Many more things

It's taught my mum critical thinking due to the things I read and pass in and the discussions we have.

Always amazed at how much shit people take as normal. I don't know anyone in real life that are used by some of the CF's you hear about on here. Are people really that spineless??

Ive learned that MN people don't really understand what rural means! Just get a bus or you can't pay double for a taxi on Sunday!! Seriously, those Londoncentric twats have NO IDEA!

How the Snowflake generation really does exists!! I don't let little Jonny out to play without at least 3 armed guards! Or my little Jonny is 32 and still doesn't pay rent AIBU to ask for £2.50 a year!

God forbid you call anyone fat!!! Or complain about being squashed by a fat selfish passenger. In real life you'd be spitting feathers but on here, the keyboard warriors come out in force to defend the obese.

I have recently learned that I am now really just a grumpy old lady! :)

I learnt some good tips on here about staying warm while camping. One was changing into your PJs and putting clothes on top after dinner, so you don't have to get completely undressed and put on cold PJs for bed. Another was wearing a hat while sleeping, and also a scheme for making sure your airbed isnt a block of cold air by layering it round with blankets.

I was the one who didn't get hypothermia, and so was able to help the others.

How to survive recurrent miscarriages, MN is the only place I’ve had to let it all out and commune with women who really get it.

How to be a good stepmum (sadly in the time I’ve been on here the step parenting board has been mostly taken over by bile spewing nutters but it used to be helpful)

Sensible healthy boundaries in relationships. If I’d had MN before I’d have left my horrible ex long before I eventually did.

That my family is very healthy, happy and functional. I’m lucky in my siblings and appreciate them so much more.

How to prepare myself and my marriage for a baby. A lot of little things I’ve read and ingested that I might not have realised at the time have been valuable in navigating having a family.

How to say no to things. Might have come with getting older and I would never use no as a complete sentence but I have felt okay saying no things don’t work for me/us and not tied myself in knots afterwards about being a horrible person for doing so

The putting bedlinen in a pillow case - game changer.

My favourite daal recipe was from here.

Lots of posters have given me more empathy for the struggles people might be going through. Others have reminded me what arseholes there are in the world. It’s a mixed bag.

I appreciate my husband more. It’s shocking how many women stay with nightmare partners/husbands because their standards are so low. It took me longer than it should have to leave my ex but dear god, the shit some people put up with baffles me.

I’ve also read two books written by mumsnetters. One very good, one atrocious.

NOT to put fabric conditioner in the rug doctor (a lesson taught the hard way...thanks mumsnet). Dont have a problem with it anywhere else though

Stately homes has also been a game changer!

That a lot of people take the seemingly positive value of "putting the kids first" to extreme, illogically excessive levels and it only has a negative effect on the people they are raising.

That many women make things worse with their MIL.
EVERYONE eats posh food and a meal like sausage, mash and beans is incredibly unhealthy.
That it’s quite normal for all 3 year olds to have never tried potty training.

Predominantly I’ve learnt about skincare- ingredients and what works-and feminism.

I’ve had great kindness after a bereavement.

I enjoy reading an AIBU but never participate.

That many other people are also lonely and depressed.

That my salary (which I always thought was ok) is akin to poverty in London.

More about the realities of being a parent...

I'll always be grateful for the Education boards. I came to the UK 17 years ago and MN has been an excellent guide in navigating the education system both in private and state.

Holiday board is also good. I'm glad I found out and Duinrell from there.

Also glad that the conversations re white privilege and racial bias have started.

Not to jump to conclusions and to apply for jobs where I'm not 100% match. I have to say that topic "How people got that jobs" was an eye opener for me. Few weeks after reading it I applied for a job where I was 50% match and I got it!

Not to listen to what strangers on the internet tell you!!

For every piece of sage advice I've ever had on here there's always been at least one batshit comment.

That it is becoming very much like gransnet---a load of moaning minnies,
or have the people who choose the topics that come up on my browser
misery's

That you shouldn't wear knickers to bed. My husband calls it Mumsnet Protocol. Very happy he is too.

I am more aware of feminist issues

Definitely more aware of disability issues, especially hidden disability

The NHS is right about vaccination until it isn't (chicken pox).

People don't like it if you go to a self-serve cafe with family/friends and reserve a table while you go to the counter to order because if they are on their own they can't do the same (I had just assumed that if you were on your own, and the cafe was full, you'd go elsewhere with table service or take away).

I learned that there is a little arrow on the petrol pump symbol in your car that reminds you which side is the car the petrol tank is Yes, this!

How clever, witty and downright hilarious some women are. On so many occasions I’ve cried with laughing at threads And this!

I learned that there is a little arrow on the petrol pump symbol in your car that reminds you which side is the car the petrol tank is Yes, this

But also, that I am apparently stupid because I can't get a petrol hose to stretch to the other side of the car so I always go to the right side (I always go when it's not busy so don't queue). HOWEVER, there is a petrol station nearish to me which advertises its longer hoses and says they stretch both sides.

That no is a complete sentence

That many parents are very strict with the food they allow there children to eat. The idea that you let your little ones eat coco pops or chocolate spread on toast for breakfast is akin to child abuse and that chips should only be eaten once a year 🤯. Also never to live on a street with no drive to park on as your neighbours will start parking wars with you

Should you really not wear knickers to bed?!

That people go to such lengths to prove what virtuous eaters they are to a bunch of strangers on the internet. cf:

Meals are ALWAYS: homecooked, from scratch, nutritious/healthy

A HUGE meal is something like half a grape and a drink of the water you washed it in

If someone is forced to eat fast food, they can only manage half a small slice of pizza before they feel sick. And you must caveat it with the fact you never normally do it.

Children beg for snacks like (home made from scratch) hummus and carrots, NEVER chocolate or (god forbid) junk food

etc.

(And then there is all the laundry. Oh god the LAUNDRY! Every half-hour on the hour whether it needs it or not, boil wash it immediately!)

That there are idiots who think strangers on the internet are able to tell them whether or not they’re pregnant when they’ve not even taken a test. That stupidity and ignorance is running rampant in today’s society and that people will believe anything.

Gosh, where do I start?
I have learnt that there are an awful lot of interfering MILs out there.

You can’t give babies cool boiled water anymore ( how did we survive 40 years ago?)

There are some very rude people on here.

A lot of people seem to be unnecessarily worrying about other people’s business rather than getting on with their own.

What temperature we should wash our smalls on.

The amazing list goes on.

I’ve learned that there are a lot of very strong women in the world.
I’ve learned that even though I am alone, I’m not alone - there are women everywhere who care.
I’ve learned that that there are a great many nutty neighbors.
I’ve learned there are all-inclusive vacays.
I’ve learned to park in front of my flat & not let crazy neighbors badger me into moving my car.
I’ve learned that real women kick ass & take names.
I love that - it gives me hope & strength.