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Original poster

Who's up? I need someone to hold my hand

95 replies

aloneinthenight · 09/07/2019 01:42

We have just found out my son has leukaemia.

I'm in hospital with him, DH has gone home, I don't know what to do.

I can't sleep, I can't do anything. I can't cry because then I won't stop.

OP posts:

Georgeofthejungle · 09/07/2019 01:47

How scarey for you OP. Didn’t want to read any go. I’m so sorry you are having to deal with this. Your son really is in the best place - and you by his side is the best place for you too x

allhalekale · 09/07/2019 01:47

Hand hold . That sounds devastating. You’re there for your son you’re being amazing. I don’t know what else to say big virtual hug x

RubberTreePlant · 09/07/2019 01:48

Ah you poor thing. What a horrible shock.

How old is your DS? Have they outlined treatment plans yet?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Babies & sleep Children's sleep

RogueV · 09/07/2019 01:57

Here to hold your hand.
How old is your son?
He is in the best place

MrsEricBana · 09/07/2019 02:00

Oh I'm very very sorry to hear this. Have they said how they will tackle it? Ask lots of questions tomorrow and write stuff down so you don't forget it all. Thinking of you.

Emelene · 09/07/2019 02:04

That sounds so hard. How old is your son? How is he feeling? Xx

Original poster

aloneinthenight · 09/07/2019 02:10

It's all such a shock. We literally took him to the GP because he'd been off colour for a few days.

Less than 12 hours later were admitted to hospital.

Will know more tomorrow.

OP posts:

newmomof1 · 09/07/2019 02:10

Oh OP I'm sorry

I guess he's staying in tonight if DH has gone home?
I know it's probably almost impossible for you to sleep, but your son needs you to be strong. Please make sure you try to eat and get some sleep so that you can be at your best for him xxx

Exhsuatedmuch · 09/07/2019 02:11

You must be so scared and shocked and I would imagine dad is too. Tell us a little bit about your son. In the mean time write down anything you think of to ask and maybe chat to us insomniacs here.. I know when my daughter was in hospital I couldn't sleep at all,just kept looking at her sleeping.. Xxxx

Lweji · 09/07/2019 02:12

MzHz · 09/07/2019 02:13

Oh love! You poor thing! Poor things all of you! I’m so sorry you’re feeling so alone and scared

You can go and talk to a nurse if you need to? When my ds was in burns unit there was one night when it all came crashing in and I had a long tearful chat with a nurse, and it really helped.

It’s always shit at night, so lonely, but you have us, and hopefully a nurse or two there.

Wishing you all the best and every strength to your little boy (Hug)

Original poster

aloneinthenight · 09/07/2019 02:14

He's 13 and as strong as an ox. Never had more than a cold before.

He is reckless and an adrenaline junkie. I was prepared for broken bones and all manner of scrapes but not this.

OP posts:

cannycat20 · 09/07/2019 02:14

I am so sorry you're having to deal with this.

How old is your son? Will it be tomorrow before they can let you know what their treatment approach will be, as well as help you and your family with some support?

Morning isn't far away now, when you'll be able to talk to the medical experts - just a few more hours, though it may feel endless right now.

Sounds like you're doing amazingly. As others have said, you're in the best place, as is your son.

Exhsuatedmuch · 09/07/2019 02:23

So at that age there's no hiding it from him. Such a worry. However the way you've described him ( sounds great BTW) I'd say he's a fighter for sure. Doesn't sound like he will let this stop him in his tracks. You'll know more tomorow and that will feel a little easier as there will be knowledge and a plan to work to. You will be strong enough to see him through this and hopefully you'll have family support and he will have all his mates to fill his days with nonsense banter. These next few days will be hard but you'll do it. Xxxx

Exhsuatedmuch · 09/07/2019 02:25

Ps. Crying is good .. If he's asleep find a quiet spot and cry, go do what you need to do and feel stronger for it I know I did. X

Italiangreyhound · 09/07/2019 02:26

I'm so sorry. This must be very tough. I'm here hand-holding.

managedmis · 09/07/2019 02:30

Oh darling what a terrible shock your poor son

We're here, you're not alone. Lots of folks around

HypatiaCade · 09/07/2019 02:31

Oh, I'm so sorry.

At some point when you're looking for the positives, your DS is strong as an ox, that's a really positive thing with this diagnosis. But it's such a shit thing to have happen...

Original poster

aloneinthenight · 09/07/2019 02:33

I've had a cup of tea and a good cry.

I don't want to go to sleep because I can't face waking up and realising it wasn't a dream.

OP posts:

Tavannach · 09/07/2019 02:33

bringincrazyback · 09/07/2019 02:35

That's terrible, I'm so sorry OP. Hand holds from me.

ineedtostopbeingsolazy · 09/07/2019 02:39

I'm so sorry about your son.
When my daughter was diagnosed with cancer I felt like I was in a daze I was going to through the motions going to appointments, scans, operations all with a smile on my face so the children wouldn't be scared. But I was scared and my husband was scared we really I didn't know what would happen.

This is very early for you you've just found out you have to get over the shock, which actually you may never do, I sometimes am still in shock 3 years later. But things will happen and you just got to go with it.

Justsaynonow · 09/07/2019 02:41

I'm so sorry - try to take it one day at a time if your brain tries to flood you with "what if's". There's been loads of progress in treatments recently.

Brenna24 · 09/07/2019 02:42

No words of advice other than that he is fit and strong and that will stand him in good stead. Try and get some sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long, difficult day for you and you will need all the strength that you can muster. Please have a very unmumsnetty hug from me.

Original poster

aloneinthenight · 09/07/2019 02:43

All the doctors have been very positive so far, but it doesn't help.

He's my baby boy.

OP posts:

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