Hubby planning a world trip

[keepingthisasecret]

My husband has just told me he is planning to do a trip around the world (not every country), with his friends, leaving me with the children by myself for at least 6 months, maybe a little less. He is able to do that with his company luckily! They will just keep him on the books and re employ him again. I said that I am against it in all honesty because why should I be stuck at home looking after the kids and working my ass off while he is off gallivanting with his mates on a world tour! He is telling me he only gets to live once and therefore he wants to go and enjoy himself. I said if he goes then we are not going to be here by the time he gets back. Sounds very , very over the top but I am so angry that he hasn't even thought of me. I mean it that i will be leaving if he goes! I will do it once the children are old enough to look after themselves but for now they're only young. Would you let him go? Or am I being a moody unreasonable cow? Honest truths!

Actually just thinking about this, do you think him and his mates were planning a 2 week holiday to begin with ? they all said no way your wife will agree to that so came up with the plan of saying 6 months, so that when he then put 2 weeks to you it didn't seem as bad and you'd agree ?

I'm gobsmacked, I have no words

What a selfish prick he is.

Is this his weird way of asking for a separation?

YANBU if my husband said that to me I'd tell him exactly what you told yours. I'd be gone. It's alright for some isn't it who think that they can go out and be happy while their partner has to shoulder all the work, stress and hardship around raising a family and keeping a house together. He's not a young single man anymore he's married with a wife and children. If he wanted to go on a trip around the world he should of done so before getting married.

I wonder if the plan was 2 weeks all along? I like the suggestion that you go away for 2 weeks first and then see what happens.

blow waiting for him to have 2 weeks - you have a break before him - only other reason is when you have family for one spouse overseas & something notable or family emergency (ie health of close relative) because you cant afford both & it would be discussed first & the push would be from the partner staying at home (yes this happened with us & once it was me traveling - further than dh! for a very happy occasion in my case) but than we are partners & care about each other. Its called give & take - this is just self centred

Could he have suggested the 6 months just so he sounds reasonable for compromising with 2 weeks. Maybe that's what he wanted all along and just wanted you to give in.

Regardless, he's a prick. Leave him.

Hell no!!

I'm normally in the camp of just because you're married you're not joined at the hip and I'm a firm believer both parties should have hobbies/me time/nights or weekends away with friends... but a world trip is a step too far even for me!!!!!

If there's money for a 6 month round the world trip for one person there's enough for a shortened 2/3 month version for the FAMILY!

Tell him that's fab and to remember the kids passports as he'll be taking them with him.

He doesn't get to act like a single bloke anymore. Any of that crap and I would seriously end things to find a grown up to be with.

He is taking the piss frankly.

I also thought of the Marian Keyes book. A good read btw.

Even two weeks away is only fair if you get to do it too.

2 weeks holidays?
Yep. Just make sure you are taking two weeks yourself FIRST and wo the children of course.

I wouod also have a serious look at the relationship itself. I think you’re right about him wanting ‘a break’ from his family. But if this is the case, then maybe you also want to see if this is a relationship worth fighting for or not.

Even 2 weeks is taking the p. I would have laughed like a drain at this. You don't get to check out from family whenever you feel like it. Why the hell does he think he can just f off and leave you to hold the fort for 2 weeks while he has a jolly?

Tell him once he is single again he can do what the hell he likes but right now he is a partner and a dad and has responsibilities. If he wants to be single tell him you can arrange that for him but he will still have parental responsibilities no matter what.

Selfish doesn't cover it. How is he going to pay for 2weeks holiday for him and his share of the bills at home if he isnt working?
A long weekend away fine for something specific but if he wants a holiday then you and kids deserve one too, you know as a family like most people!

Tell him.to get his head out his arse and grow up.

I'm currently doing what he is suggesting. Difference is that we have no kids and DP is at a crucial point with work so he joins for two weeks every six so he encouraged me.

He is not BU to want to go but he is U to expect to leave you with the kids.

A holiday for 2 weeks is fine. Dh and I have youngish dc and both go on trips with our friends or solo. It's fairly common amongst our friends to take holidays with friends separate to family or couple holidays (admittedly we usually just go for 4 days or so but sometimes up to 10 days). 6 months is ridiculous and I'd be getting a divorce if dh insisted on that.

Sounded like an ambit claim, ‘ if I ask for 6 months she will be grateful when I ask for 2 weeks and agree’.
Nope.
Tell him he can have a weekend but you need a weekend off before to build up your stamina to do everything alone.
He needs to grow up

Yea id be issuing serious sanctions on him for this, also I would do the same, and he would have to do it too.

Id have divorce papers ready for him when he returned and after where hed be sticking his wick wouldn't touch it with a barge pole :D

Lots of couples have a two week break without spouse and kids - but it has to be a reciprocal arrangement. So if he's happy for you to have a two week trip away where he looks after the kids that's perfectly reasonable of him to do the same. (Make sure your two weeks away is before his though...)

What a bellend. Did he not think about doing this BEFORE he had kids? To be honest I'm shocked that he can even contemplate not seeing them for 6 months; when my boys go to their dad's for a week I miss them terribly. Skype/FaceTime just isn't the same.

I’d have laughed in his face! What planet is he on???

It’d be a no from me, and that’s to 2 weeks away. 6 months would mean divorce.

So when's your 2-week holiday then?