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Child tried to strangle my son

45 replies

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 04:36

Just that really. happened after school. Got him in a head lock. Son very upset. Seems there was some provocation but a small thing. They are both ten.

I was letting him walk home alone now, at the end of year 5, but think I will walk to the school to meet him. the other mum dealt with it and told me about it.

OP posts:
Alicewond · 15/06/2019 04:40

Without knowing what caused it difficult to advice, does he or the other boy have any issues?

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 04:47

No, no issues. Seems they were playing with bikes and my son tapped his pen on the boys wheel, which caused him to snap it in half and then strangle him.

OP posts:
Totur · 15/06/2019 04:52

my son tapped his pen on the boys wheel, which caused him to snap it in half

What does that even mean. Were the bikes stationery and your son did something with a writing pen and the other boy flipped out?

Not sure why you're worried. At least the other Mum was there.

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 04:53

Sorry- I mean cased the boy to take it and snap it in half.

Sorry you don't understand why DS would not be upset by the strangling.

OP posts:
Totur · 15/06/2019 04:58

Why are you posting exactly? So another boy was rough with him, but the mother intervened. Now what?
Still don't know what happened with the pen.

newmomof1 · 15/06/2019 05:00

@user87382294757 can you re-type your last post and proofread it before you submit, so we can try to understand what you're saying?

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:03

The boy took the pen and broke it in half

and then strangled DS in a head lock

OP posts:
user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:03

But that is OK Hmm

OP posts:
user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:04

Most parents are not there collecting at this age

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Totur · 15/06/2019 05:21

What's the point of your post? Have you consoled your son? Told him that it was unacceptable? Told him not to play with the other boy any more? I'm sorry, I just don't get what you're posting about.

Totur · 15/06/2019 05:24

It might help if you asked us a question. Otherwise it's just you telling us a story and we're not sure what you want from us?

AuntMarch · 15/06/2019 05:28

So your son and another boy had a scuffle. The other boys mum sorted it, and told you about it. The end?

"Strangled" though? I can't see a ten year olds headlock being strong enough to stop him breathing.

Unpleasant experience but if the boys mum sorted it, what else do you want to happen?

TrixieFranklin · 15/06/2019 05:38

Eh?

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:39

I wanted to speak about how to deal with it. I guess you are right the mum dealt with it and maybe I am over-reacting as it might not have caused harm. I wasn't sure.

I have told my son not to provoke the other boy and the mum said to both boys it was wrong and to apologise.

So I guess we just move on and hope it doesn't happen again

DH thanks I should now start walking down from school with DS after school but had been trying to let him do this alone ready for secondary

And no need to tell school in case he tried strangling other children?

OP posts:
user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:41

I mean if you look here it is suggested to tell the school etc

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/1863172-Urgent-help-please-ds8-strangled-by-another-child-at-school

OP posts:
user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:44

And also suggesting to tell the police and saying about moving schools!

Why such a different response to my post?

OP posts:
Totur · 15/06/2019 05:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 05:54

Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit

OP posts:
lunar1 · 15/06/2019 05:55

Why are people being so shitty to the op? I completely understand how you feel, what would have happened if the other mum hadn't been there.

Were they still in the school grounds when this happened?

MintyT · 15/06/2019 05:58

I understand that your upset, but these things happen, they shouldn't but they do. The other mum sorted it and it's done with.
Your boy needs to understand not to provoke others and the other boy needs to learn not to react as he did. Two wrongs don't make a right etc.
Let him come home from school on his one and behave, this is no need to call the police ( or the school IMO).
Don't be upset anymore, let this be a learning curve, but if it happens again then that's a different matter,

BlueBrushing · 15/06/2019 05:59

Your poor son, that's really upsetting.

A headlock is certainly not anything to do with strangling, though. Just say "got my son in a headlock". I hope your son feels OK emotionally after the fight.

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 06:11

Ok, thanks. I wasn't sure as the other mum left a message saying he has strangled him, which of course was quite worrying.

I used to feel it was possible to chat on this section as it is called 'chat' but seems you need to ask a question nowadays like in AIBU

OP posts:
Ladywillpower · 15/06/2019 06:12

Agree with MintyT.
Provided it is a "one off" & as the other boys mum dealt with it on the spot & told you I wouldn't try to take it any further.

user87382294757 · 15/06/2019 06:15

We have zero tolerance on fighting on our house so it is all new to me.

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BurnedToast · 15/06/2019 06:25

Is your son OK?

From what you've said, I would say a headlock isn't the same as someone putting their hands round your throat, which is what most people think of as strangling .

However.

I can see why it's upsetting if your our son is distressed and he was held so tightly that he felt genuinely scare. It's hard to comment on without knowing what part your son played, how he feels and how tightly the other boy held him.

But it does seem to have been dealt with. If your son is in year 5 then he'll be off to secondary school in just over a year. I think your better off giving him the tools to deal with these situations rather than reducing his freedom. I'd leave it a day or two before making any decisions.