Fuming- apparently I need to be more "chill"

[FurCoatNoSnickers]

this is going to be ranty.

That's a huge breach of trust and also a security risk to your home on many levels.
I'd demand P&D get her remove the photos ASAP before you leave him an appropriate review! I'd also look at if there's any kind of P&D trade governing body he's a member of to report him to.

You can report directly on Facebook, no need to involve her. CF!!!

No bad review if the work was done to a high speck but definitely add he brought in a’stranger’ without permission into your home to photograph the work done. This is very inappropriate.

Teddy that’s what I said to Dh- she had no permission to be in my home- he didn’t have permission to allow anyone in either

And yes everything was pretty much finished he had a small snagging list to finish. There’s were no blank canvases all our stuff was out and living in.

If you can afford it, I would see a solicitor to find out what, if any, laws either of them has broken. The request can then come in the form of a scary solicitor's letter to either/both of them. You say she can cause trouble? Well, people like that normally back down when confronted.

Jesus. I'd be cross if it was a stranger who came in to take promo shots for the P&D without my permission... but the fact she just wanted to get inspiration for her own project is the part that would tip me into feeling livid too.

As others have mentioned- honest feedback about the quality of work but massive caveat about letting someone into your home whilst you were out to take personal use photos of your home without permission = cannot recommend. I'd also be adding that he's told you he can't see a problem with having done this.

Facebook can take pics down if you report them without you having to contact the gossipy person. Feeling much anger on your behalf OP! X

I'd ask her direct to take the photo's of your home down now. If you go via Facebook she'll figure it out so you might as well give her the option of doing it herself.

You don't need to explain yourself. The other option is to post comments asking her how in the world she got photo's of your home!

You should be livid. That's appalling. WTF was he thinking? Yes to leaving him a review saying what he did. But you should also approach Queen bee woman and express your horror and ask her to take down the photos. She sounds bonkers.

The whole thing is definitely odd...the builder could have taken pictures himself (they often do to show off their work). So absolutely no need for anyone else to be in your home.

No no no, this is so bad!! What was this guy thinking?! I'm livid for you!

I agree with the pp, wouldn't this be a form of trespassing?

I'd be leaving a very honest review... work was good but he is clearly not professional!

I can't believe how angry I feel on your behalf! 😡🤬🤣

I'd just say his work was 'ok' but would really emphasise what he did with regards to allowing the other owrson into your home without your knowledge or permission.

I'd be furious at what he's done.

Wow

You’re all making me feel normal

I would do both things - write your strongly worded message now, while the adrenaline's flowing but DO NOT SEND.

Then get on with your work.

This evening, take a more reflective moment to consider what to do.

I think I would:

1. Write a proper letter to the decorator, letting him know how unacceptable this was - and it was. Even if she were Jesus, it's not up to him to invite people into your home without your permission.

The silly thing is that a quick 'would it be ok to show my relative / your neighbour your extension tomorrow?' would probably gain a yes from most people, maybe not you and that's fine, regardless of who the relative was. It would also have given you a chance to tidy.

Would you have been ok with him showing her pictures? That would be very normal - for him to take pictures of the completed painting job himself and show them to potential clients on his phone, without sending them to them. That could be your 'this is what would have been normal and reasonable' line (again, with warning to allow tidying - presumably pictures taken on his last day).

2. Don't approach her or comment on her post. If she lives on social media she'll make a big deal of it there, in front of lots of people, which will attract far more attention then her original post. This is presumably what you wish to avoid. She will play the innocent victim of a misunderstanding (which she kind of is, however manipulative), thus portraying you as an uptight busybody.

3. Do be careful how you word things with the decorator. Be factual and professional. Don't be vindictive. Remember, queen bee social media woman is his relative and may take his part, if you make this public. She has more social media experience and more followers than you.

Wtaf he brought someone into your home to take photos of your personal space without your knowledge or permission??

I don’t believe what he did was legal, but someone else might know better than me on the particulars of it. Just because you agreed for him to enter your home does not mean you have agreed to any random other person to enter it!

I would withhold final payment until he gets her to take them down and threaten a hugely stinking review.

I would most certainly be seeing a solicitor if this had happened to me. Seriously not okay to do that.

Talk to a solicitor first before you tip him off that you are livid about this. Im truly aghast that they’ve done this.

Actually yes, if queen bee woman is half decent, you could approach her quietly and say that actually you're not really comfortable with having pictures of your home online and would she mind taking them down? No drama and leave it there.

Christ! I'd be absolutely livid!

But the people saying report to FB - for what? I seriously doubt the photos will have broken any of their guidelines. They won't care.

Flipping heck - he let someone else into your home? I'd be absolutely incandescent! I'd def be seeking solicitors advice.

And as for 'unpleasant woman' - I'd be going ballistic at her too. She may be unpleasant and could cause trouble - but you have absolutely no question of Right on your side. She was massively out of order and I'd be letting everyone know about it.

Definitely the decorator & uninvited visitor are completely in the wrong.

I would tell the decorator to get her to remove AND delete the photos from all her devices immediately. His mess he needs to sort it.

For the review of the business it would depend on whether he does sort it out in next 24 hours. If he doesn't then I would put 'I'm afraid I cannot recommend as he invited a stranger into my home when I wasn't there and that person then put photos of my home on to social media'. It's short and factual not emotive.

When I've been stuck in a situation and I needed to respond to someone, I would say that I was seeking further professional advice on the situation and will respond to them shortly. I would do that with the P&D, who has demonstrated a massive breach of trust by bringing someone in to your home and emphasise that you would never have agreed to this if asked, and had not said that he could use his access to your home to show anyone else his work.

If you got him from an online recommendation service I would certainly take it up with them. He is not to be trusted.

Do you have any access to legal advice, through union membership/home insurance/work? He has probably breached his own terms and conditions if he is a member of a professional body.

I’m gobsmacked that the decorator thinks it’s OK to let members of his family in your house. The reasons given are feeble at best, and yes, you should absolutely mention it in a review. As for Queenbee, I suppose she did that on purpose, and I personally would go via FB rather then confronting her directly.

@lottiegarbanzo

A half decent person wouldn’t contemplate entering a home they didn’t have permission to do so on the say so of their relative the tradesperson.

Nor would they poke their sticky beak around and take photos.

Nor would they publish those photos on Facebook.

The woman is an entitled cow and the tradesman a fool.

She won’t be receptive to removing the photos as that would be her admitting she did something wrong when in her eyes she can do no wrong.

What the fuck?! That is such a gross invasion of privacy. Not only would he be getting an absolute slating on every social media and review site I could think of I’d also be contacting any professional bodies he might be affiliated or registered with.