If it turns out that one god or set of gods is actually real....

[BertrandRussell]

.....who would you like it to be? I’m currently favouring the Mount Olympus lot because all of the totally selfish, quarrelsome, touchy behaviour goes some way to explaining the state of the world. And there were some pretty cool women. The rapeyness is a bit of an issue- but maybe a Training Day would sort that out?

BillywigSting, and Kali the goddess of 'destruction' destroys the demons of ignorance. Go Kali.

I think it would be a laugh if the god(s)were not human. Imagine if dolphins are actually gods living amongst us? Or cats? Cats behave like gods so maybe they are.

I’m sure God forgives you, OP - He forgave our torture and crucifixion, so presumably can handle sneery pisstaking about His existence

If that one turns out to be real he'll not be forgiven by me easily.

Finding parking spaces being more important that children with cancer of whole swathes of humanity starving.

Could we skip gods entirely and find out that magic is real?

You've just reminded me of a very old mural I saw in some obscure palace in southern India, of a many-armed Krishna pleasuring a whole bunch of milkmaids simultaneously.

It made Christianity look deeply uptight.

Cats behave like gods so maybe they are. They were worshipped in ancient Egypt. I think that's what gave them their superiority complex.

Yahweh. Just so all that keeping kosher/fasting/observing Pesach will have been worth it

I'm fond of all those rotund fertility goddesses. Let's celebrate women creating life rather than pretending old men do it. Pick one of the many that existed before monotheistic religions decided women needed to be put in their place.

And Sheela-na-gigs.

@DarlingNikita does that mean Google/wikipedia is a goddess? It's certainly destroyed a fair bit of my ignorance

I'm fond of all those rotund fertility goddesses.

They are pretty cool, though some of them seem to be associated with things like handfasting (get semi-married, if you aren't pregnant within a year you can sod back off to Mum and Dad).

Although I do have a soft spot for the Greek and Norse Gods (debauchery, blood lust and epic sagas!) I'd like to think they're all real. That God is all the God's of all the religions throughout the world, throughout human history. That one God manifests itself to the people of the time in the form of a 'divine educator' that can reach out to them personally. I hope that makes sense. I'm not great at explaining things

Essentially I'm a believer of the Bahá’í faith. Have a Google if you're interested!

And Sheela-na-gigs.

I'm a fan. Although no one still seems entirely sure what they were for, or why you find women waving their gaping vulvae around in churches, but I suppose we'd find out.

None since they don't exist but if you twisted my arm then I would pick Dionysus who, in short, is god of booze.

Sheela na gigs are pretty interesting, there's a fair few of them on various churches near where I grew up. The nearest one got taken down by a priest in the 50s though apparently because it was too pagan and naked which is a shame but hey ho that's the catholic church for you.

Dionysus is basically an ancient frat boy

My take is that about 50 AD someone noticed that women were getting positions of power in the church and SHUT THAT STUFF DOWN PRONTO.

That would be St Paul then, if you read some relevant stuff in Corinthians, it's all there. Never liked him much.

BillywigSting, yes, absolutely, we should all give thanks to Google and Wiki

Norse, always had a crush on Thor, even before Marvel!

I agree, St. Paul is awful.

They should have put Priscilla in charge.

Anyone remember Miles Kingston's United Deities?

Nah, they’re all a bit rubbish.

I don’t recall seeing any ‘parting of the waves’ type miracles, that any two bit god could perform any day.

Children being abused, terrorists blowing up nightclubs, planes crashing and not one blooming miracle in sight?

I’m going to stick to worshiping my cats, just like the ancient Egyptians.

Yes to St Paul being a total dick.

The Egyptians are alright, bit too incesty for me though

Norse gods for sure!!
Would be like a real life soap opera with lots of epic battles thrown in!

@Baskerville we do a non blood sacrifice, most often bread, meat and mead.

Osiris, Ohrmazd and Marduk have got together for a revival tour.