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Original poster

My girl is the only girl in her year

55 replies

Nicolerb · 07/05/2019 18:26

My girl is the only one in her reception year. Has anyone else had a similar experience... and can it ever work out well in your opinion or experience?
We didn’t find out the gender imbalance until after we had begun the induction period and we were told by the school that it would probably be fine as they have mixed year group, ie yr 1 girls in her class. At first it seemed fine, but what we see now is that the yr 1 girls don’t choose to play with reception kids and that our girl feels increasingly left out of the boys games and social groups. She has no individual play dates at all, though she is included in group play dates. Can this ever work, or should we pull her out of school? A nearby school has said they are keen to take her and she would have 20 girls in her year group there. However, her current school is reassuring us that it will all be ok. Can this possibly work out well? Any thoughts would be appreciated!

OP posts:
Branleuse · 07/05/2019 18:29

At that age my daughter wouldnt have been bothered about this at all. In fact she still wouldnt mind. Do the boys not play with her?

Teddybear45 · 07/05/2019 18:30

I would take her out if she doesn’t have friends and isn’t getting play dates - a lot of parents are short sighted when it comes to boys playing with girls. Not worth it if there’s another school as an option.

Hoppinggreen · 07/05/2019 18:31

I would move schools to be honest

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Fantasisa · 07/05/2019 18:31

Is this a private school?

Singlenotsingle · 07/05/2019 18:31

I'd pull her out. If there are no other girls in reception this year, there won't be any in year 1 next year! The year 2 girls won't play with her, and the new reception girls next year won't either.

AJPTaylor · 07/05/2019 18:32

Move her.

viques · 07/05/2019 18:33

I would move her if you have the chance, which it sounds as though you do, it's not likely to get better and might get a lot worse socially.

TheNavigator · 07/05/2019 18:35

At a small village primary, my daughter was one of only 2 girls in her class. The other girl had a difficult home life and didn't really become a friend. We moved schools for P2 and it was so much better - she found friends at once that she is still friends with over 15 years later.

tkband3 · 07/05/2019 18:37

There was a 1/3 - 2/3 girl - boy split in one of my DTs classes which did limit the opportunities to make friends. Generally, in reception, I would suggest that girls and boys don't really see the gender divide and play with each other happily, but it definitely does make much more of a difference further up the school (starts around year 3 I reckon). However given that your DD is in a minority of one, I would recommend moving her, as unless there is a dramatic turnover in the cohort, things are unlikely to improve for her.

Overthinker33 · 07/05/2019 18:42

I would move her

snowdrop6 · 07/05/2019 18:42

No I think she would be unhappy.id move her fast

Chancewouldbeafinethlng · 07/05/2019 18:43

Obviously boys and girls can play together but I think it’s unfair to deprive her of female friendships. I would move her.

Original poster
Nicolerb · 07/05/2019 18:44

Thanks so much for all your comments. I really appreciate it. That really clinches our thinking. We are gutted as the current school is outstanding, but can’t let our baby go through school with no friends x

OP posts:
Chocolatepeanuts · 07/05/2019 18:46

There's only 1 little girl in DSs P1 (reception) class. He says she sits with the boys for lunch and obviously in class but plays with the p2 girls at break (composite classes). I can see this becoming a problem next year when her girlfriends move to another teacher. Have no idea if it bothers the little one or her parents though.

PianoTuner567 · 07/05/2019 18:48

Yeah, I’d move her. It might be a minor issue now but it’ll get bigger as she gets older.

Villanellesproudmum · 07/05/2019 18:52

My daughter only had 1 boy in her class in years 5 & 6. He was fine, lots of funny pictures with him in the group esp the end of year 6 dinner surrounded by ‘his’ girls but there was only 5 in the year so that may have made a difference. He was very much seen as a brother by the girls. How many are in the year?

Bettythedevil · 07/05/2019 18:53

I had 10 other girls in my primary class - even that wasn’t quite enough when friendships started to turn sour!

In your shoes I would move her to the other school even if it is a lovely school.

UCOinanOCG · 07/05/2019 18:53

My friends 6yo DD goes to a very small school and there are no girls her age. Her best friend is a boy. They have play dates just like she would with female friends. She goes to ballet lessons so she gets a lot of female company there. I wouldn't worry about it.

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone · 07/05/2019 18:53

As a teacher I would move her. I find it staggering that the school doesn't think it is an issue, especially when she has clearly been on her own for much of the year. Of course it's not the Yr1 girls fault either, they already have a friendship group but it must be incredibly isolating for your daughter and it doesn't sound like the situation is likely to improve.

IvanaPee · 07/05/2019 18:53

I’d move her.

FizzyGreenWater · 07/05/2019 18:54

Move her, it will shape her entire school experience.

Friendship forming and social development are so so important for primary.

Floralnomad · 07/05/2019 18:55

When my dd started reception ( private ) there were 3 small classes and in hers there were only 3 girls including her and I do think it affected her friendships throughout the next few years , particularly as the other 2 girls had both left by the end of yr 2 .

Heratnumber7 · 07/05/2019 18:56

If she's the only girl now, she's likely to be the only girl for the next several years.

I'd move her.

ValleyoftheHorses · 07/05/2019 18:57

There are 7 boys and 14 girls in DS class of 21. I have considered moving him because of this. He’s staying g for now (yr 2), but we are considering moving him for years 5 and 6. Independent schools.

Katebob22 · 07/05/2019 18:57

I would move her.

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