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Son in huge trouble

50 replies

WorriedandScaredMum · 09/04/2019 01:05

This could be outing so Daily Mail, Mirror,Express fuck right off. You don't have permission to use this.

Basically in November 2017, I was in the way to work when my husband called (7am) and said the police were there to talk to my son. I raced back but missed most of the interview. My son was 17 then. My husband (not his dad) was there though. Apparently ds was in a group chat in WhatsApp and one of them sent through some files which were Lollyporn. Manga drawings of young girls. My son said he looked at one and didn't like it so he just ignored them.

But he had had his phone set up so they saved to his google drive automatically and he didn't realise they were there. The police had done a big operation and done dawn raids on all this group. He now has no contact with any of them. They we're all at school and college previously.

My husband gave the police his devices before I got there, voluntarily. They said they would be examined and we'd hear back from them. They said they were child protection officers and that they were there to protect my son.

My son has asd/odd as well and has lots of behavioural issues.

Anyway roll on to this year. My son is now nearly 19 and they contacted me to ask him in for a voluntary interview. I arranged a solicitor but can't be his appropriate adult due to my job and conflict of interest. So since January they've been back and forth trying to arrange an interview date when social services can arrange an appropriate adult at the same time as my son can make it, due to work etc.

Just to add to his pressure, his dad has just died very suddenly and we've literary just had his funeral. The solicitor had got back in touch with another interview date for May.

My son is not coping but refuses to go to the gp to arrange counselling for stress and I can see him just going under. I'm trying to be as supportive as possible but I can't make him go to the doctor and we can't afford private counselling at all.

I'm so bloody worried that they'll arrest him there and then and put him in custody. He will just crumble if this happens. He was so upset with his dad dying and this has been going on for so long now. I don't know what to do. I'm not dealing with the solicitor as he's over 18 now so I have no idea what's going on. He just shuts down completely.

Sorry this is so long and rambling. It's late and I'm tired and worried. I don't know what to do.

OP posts:
Weightsandmeasures · 09/04/2019 01:14

Why do they want to interview him and why do you think he is in big trouble? The interview might be a follow up to check how things are. If he has not been involved since then with anything suspicious, you shouldn't worry. But you are extremely worried so I'm wondering what has led you to believe he might be in big trouble.

Pieceofpurplesky · 09/04/2019 01:17

Has he done something else or is this from the first incident?

cloudymelonade · 09/04/2019 02:00

I think you might need to break this down simply OP.

-firstly, as far as I'm aware, having manga porn in your possession is not illegal. But feel free to correct me
-police investigated, nothing happened.
-nearly two years later, he has been asked to attend a voluntary interview which has dragged on to be arranged so clearly can't be too pressing.

Not entirely sure why he needs an appropriate adult if he's 18 but again, feel free to correct me.

I really wouldn't be worrying so much about this, if he was in really big trouble, this wouldn't have been dragged out over 2 years.

BlankTimes · 09/04/2019 02:02

Hopefully this will help you to get him the support he needs whilst the Police speak to him.
www.autism.org.uk/professionals/others/criminal-justice.aspx
Also make sure whoever is questioning him is aware of his autism.
There are some good links at the end of that article.

Alicewond · 09/04/2019 02:05

If he has done nothing illegal then why are you so concerned over him being interviewed? I am so sorry for the loss of his dad

LovelyJubbly67 · 09/04/2019 02:07

With all due respect, your DH is a moron. Voluntarily giving to the police potentially incriminating evidence about your son, who is not even his own?!? Allowing police questionning to proceed without you being present there?!?

And don't listen to the likes of Weightsandmeasures - clearly she's clueless ("The interview might be a follow up to check how things are. If he has not been involved since then with anything suspicious, you shouldn't worry.") - my arse! does she know ANYTHING about how the real world works?

Don't "volunteer" any more information or evidence - it will only be used to fit your Ds up, whether or not he's done anything wrong. Get a good criminal solicitor NOW. National autistic society website has listings of recommended solicitors who have experience with special needs defendents. And of course the solicitor is free on legal aid - I think only from the point where a suspect is arrested or interviewed under caution so you may not be able to retain one straight away; but have one lined up ahead of time, just in case.

Don't exhaust yourself worrying, but don't be complacent either. Don't listen to well-meaning fools.

ColeHawlins · 09/04/2019 02:09

I'd get the thread deleted once you've got what you need OP. Disclaimers denying the tabloids permission to use your content have no effect at all.

Alicewond · 09/04/2019 02:19

If he’s guilty of something then he’s guilty and surely that’s good the police will find it? If he’s innocent then he has nothing to hide?

elasticfantastic · 09/04/2019 02:28

Ok.

At a voluntary interview he won't be arrested unless he tries to leave the interview and at that time the interviewing officers believe there is criteria to arrest him.

It's good he's having an appropriate adult. Their role is to facilitate the interview, ensure he understands the questions. They are not there to in anyway give your DS advice on how to answer questions.

Get a solicitor to attend. He is entitled to free legal advice even at a voluntary interview. Remember the solicitor can offer advice but it's up to DS how / if he answers questions. For example if he goes no comment on solicitors advice, 'my solicitor told me to say no comment ' is not a defence if the court chose to draw an inference re the not answering questions in interview.

In reply to a PP cartoon images of child porn is an offence. Possession of the images is an offence. What would be mitigating is the reason for the possession. If it is a couple of images sent without DS asking for them on a WhatsApp group and DS immediately deleted and left the group, he's unlikely to get in much trouble. He might not even be charged in that scenario. If police have examined his devices and found lots of images that were received on different days, then that's a different kettle of fish.

Hopefully it is as your son has told you and just the first scenario.

Re your DH handing the devices to the police, don't be hard on him, the police would have taken them anyway either with a warrant. I doubt they came to your door without a warrant for something like this in case when they arrived the people in your house were not cooperative.

beansontoastz · 09/04/2019 02:41

Is this his first time he's been in trouble OP? The images must have been particularly graphic for them to be involved. Gross.

Are you sure it's how your son has told it? You need to seriously ask him if there's anything he needs to say as you can hire a solicitor to help him if it's bad. (Not saying it is but if he's done something or sought out the images etc then it's a bit more than what he's said!)

Good luck. Must be really stressful.Flowers

Apoiads · 09/04/2019 03:22

He needs a solicitor with him for the interview.

GloriousGoosebumps · 09/04/2019 04:29

It's good that he has a lawyer so he's not going into this interview blind. His solicitor will have considered the content of the images / circumstances and advised your son on the legal position. Can't you choose your moment carefully and ask to see the written advice? Your son would probably find it much easier to show you the advice than to look you in the eye and tell you what he did / received from friends. I'd be concerned about the mobile devices; there were a number of rape cases which came to court last year where the police had the phones but had failed to examine them and so not found messages which weakened the prosecution case. Your son is entitled to have a solicitor present even in a voluntary interview so check whether his solicitor is going to attend the interview.

Alicewond · 09/04/2019 04:43

Op you need to consider the possibility that your son is in the wrong here:(

Ellenborough · 09/04/2019 05:02

If it is a couple of images sent without DS asking for them on a WhatsApp group and DS immediately deleted and left the group, he's unlikely to get in much trouble. He might not even be charged in that scenario.

Good grief, I should hope not.

Ellenborough · 09/04/2019 05:03

Have they given you or your some any indication about what the interview is concerning? Did they say when they contacted you that it was connected to the original issue?

Kittykat93 · 09/04/2019 05:18

Op why on earth do you think he's in big trouble?? You must have some idea on what this is about.

Your son might not have been telling you the whole story when he said he accidentally downloaded those images before, not saying that's the case here but it has to be considered.

Otherwise I agree get a solicitor involved now and present at the interview.

Flaverings · 09/04/2019 05:31

images of child porn

Please, please can we not use that phrase?

ThistlyPerf · 09/04/2019 05:55

Lollyporn is even worse.

GertrudeCB · 09/04/2019 06:16

Its images of child sexual abuse - not " child porn" or " Lollyporn"

blackcat86 · 09/04/2019 06:53

You must have some understanding OP if your work is a conflict of interest. Why cant your DH be the appropriate adult for the interview? Has your son met with the solicitor? I would do this prior to the interview and have you and DH step outside so he can talk openly. It sounds like something else has been found if they are back in touch 2 years later. Do you have any other DC at home?

Springwalk · 09/04/2019 06:55

Op

Get a solicitor on board now.
Call and ask why he is being interviewed, what charges or new evidence do they have? Make the interview sooner rather than later, so it can be dealt with.

If your son has been looking at child abuse images then yes he is in a great deal of trouble if the police decide to prosecute.

Surely you must be horrified that he has done this in the first place? I am afraid he will have to accept the consequences, as will you. At seventeen he would have know that this it is illegal and dangerous to look at child abuse images.

SileneOliveira · 09/04/2019 07:06

Its images of child sexual abuse

But it's not. It's drawings.

Distasteful certainly. But not anything which has harmed a real child in its direct production.

Agree with others - your son needs legal advice.

Springwalk · 09/04/2019 07:14

SileneOliveira Trust me, you don't get interviewed and investigated by the police for innocent 'drawings'. Op either doesn't know the full facts or she isn't telling us.

The police are overwhelmed at the moment dealing with an avalanche of people viewing child abuse, they are not going to waste time pursuing people looking at 'drawings'.

There is much, much more to this.

breeze44 · 09/04/2019 07:15

You should be able to talk to his solicitor if he gives permission. Many people do that for family members where English is a second language, for example.

whitesoxx · 09/04/2019 07:28

Springwalk I know a group of teen boys that were all spoken to by police for this exact thing. It didn't go on for two years though.

Was basically a telling off, no charges brought or anything like that.

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