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Original poster

Kids scared the shit out of me yesterday

46 replies

birdiebirdiewoofwoof · 08/04/2019 11:21

Yesterday was DD(9)'s birthday party - 5 girls invited over from her class. As it went on they got a bit giddy and started an epic game of hide and seek all over the house with DS(3) - all having fun, they were being lovely with him and he was having a whale of a time.

Then DD came to tell me they were throwing food out of her window so I went upstairs to have a word. One of them was sitting on the windowsill in DD's room with the big window wide fucking open and DS sitting on her lap. I got them straight down and the windows are now locked shut as they clearly should have been all along. I feel so stupid but I never dreamed a group of normally-sensible 9 year old girls would do something like that. I think they thought it was safe because she was holding onto him... To be fair they looked a bit shocked and apologised when I told them it wasn't safe, but fucking hell.

Today I can't go to that side of the house without picturing my little DS falling two storeys onto the concrete. In my head I can hear him hitting the ground and I can't make it stop. I know nothing happened and we've taken steps to make sure it can't happen in the future - and we will be issuing regular reminders about not climbing up there - but I'm a mess.

I don't even know what I'm looking for with this thread, really, I just want to tell somebody. Sat on the sofa crying into my coffee while the kids are at school/nursery.

OP posts:
Drogosnextwife · 08/04/2019 11:24

Don't worry about it OP, these things happen. Sometimes kids do things you would never expect them to do when they get over excited. No one was hurt and you have sorted things so it can't happen again.

Acunningruse · 08/04/2019 11:24

Oh Jesus. That must have been beyond terrifying. I'm not surprised you keep re-running it in your head it's a natural reaction. I think there are things you can buy to stop windows opening fully, I must get some before the summer.

Hope you are ok after your shock.

Original poster
birdiebirdiewoofwoof · 08/04/2019 11:25

(Obviously I was frightened for DD's friend too, realised it sounds like I was only thinking about DS)

OP posts:

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Families
EleanorLavish · 08/04/2019 11:35

My parents still talk about me doing this when I was young. Younger than the party girls yesterday, and just myself.
Neighbour spotted me singing and swinging my legs, not a care in the world. She came over and told my folks (as I waved happily to her). My folks nearly died, I couldn’t understand the fuss!
Hope you can rest easy OP, but I know how you’re feeling, they do scare the shite out of us sometimes!

Hotsummerplease · 08/04/2019 11:35

We have locks on our windows that let them open only a certain distance. We moved into our house when the kids were little and it was the first job we did, but it didn't stop me having horrific visions about what could happen with the windows. They are quite low too and open from the bottom so were lethal. The horrible shock will fade, but maybe getting some locks will help too so you know it can't happen.

Palominoo · 08/04/2019 11:45

You’ve had a shock so you’re bound to feel shaken up today.

The repetitive thoughts of what could have happened will leave your mind as you get on with everyday things.

We were at Hadleigh Castle many years ago and sat down having a picnic. My son was off playing and my daughter was sat with Grandad and I and we were enjoying the sunshine.

An older boy appeared and said my son was climbing the ruins. I turned and couldn’t see him but looked up and up and up and there was my son scaling the ruins very high up.

I legged it over there and called for him to come down and he did but my heart was in my mouth.

For the rest of the day I kept imagining him falling. He will be 24 this year and there were other hair raising incidents which he survived.

bloodywhitecat · 08/04/2019 11:45

We have just become foster parents and have had to fit restrictiors like this to all upstairs windows.

Kids scared the shit out of me yesterday
anitagreen · 08/04/2019 11:47

Oh god that sounds terrifying I live 230ft up from the ground and my kids terrify me with the windows we are trying to move but when I got this flat I bloody loved it didn't think of having kids in it at all. You've had a shock and a scare so the thoughts will be centre of your mind but it will pass bloody kids though eh Shock

msjessica · 08/04/2019 11:51

It must've been so scary op.
I still feel physically sick when I picture my 18 month old baby balancing on a box so with a knife that that I'd been using to cut chicken. Knife was well out of reach but she'd used the box to get to it. I turned round to find her with the carving knife in her mouth and the box wobbling. She flinched when she saw my face but I managed to stay calm and got the knife from her.
Afterwards I couldn't stop crying and it sounds silly but it upset me so much as you worry what could've been.
She's now 9 and it still makes me feel a chill.
Thankfully your little one is fine and you have sorted the danger out xx

Roomba · 08/04/2019 11:57

That must have been terrifying. Kids just don't see danger sometimes!

A friend's child fell two stories from an open sash window, while on a playdate at a friend's house. She was called to say an air ambulance was taking him for urgent surgery. 'Luckily', he hit and bounced off a greenhouse on the way down, so got away with just a badly broken leg. Kids really know how to scare the shit out of you, don't they? I;v e found my own DC about to do really stupid things before and they were oblivious.

DomesticAnarchist · 08/04/2019 12:03

😱 my worst nightmare.

As PPs have said, window locks are the way forwards. We have these (and I've lost the keys Hmm). Super easy to fit.

Bookworm4 · 08/04/2019 12:07

Maybe let the girls mother know, as this is a pretty big lack of awareness, 9 is old enough to understand how dangerous this is.

Chocolateisfab · 08/04/2019 12:09

My exh once sent ds5/6 to his room (attic) - went to check and he had climbed onto the roof too retrieve a ball!!
Never let him be sent up again and locked windows!
I remember my stomach dropped.

christinarossetti19 · 08/04/2019 12:14

I totally understand OP.

Shortly after we moved into our current house, ndn came round and said that she'd been in her garden and saw ds (then 5) standing on the window sill with the window wide open.

Just reading your post 5 years later and still feel gripped by the ame terror.

Obviously, all windows were then locked (and screwed shut if lock didn't work) and I still generally keep it this way tbh.

But bloody, bloody terrifying. Keep talking about it, that's the only way to process it.

frazzledasarock · 08/04/2019 12:20

When my eldest was about two, during a summer I had all windows open I was out in the garden hanging out washing and suddenly I hear my two year old yelling ‘mummy hello’ I looked up to my bedroom window and there is my two year old leaning over the windowsill, I didn’t know whether to run inside and upstairs and grab her or wait for her to fall and catch her!

The kid had climbed up on the windowsill and was kneeling on the outer part hanging over smiling down at me.
I told her not to move and raced upstairs pulled her in and locked that window will she was a lot older.

I aged twenty years that day!

Skittlesandbeer · 08/04/2019 12:21

Try try try not to let the film of what might have happened play over in your head. Your brain will dig a groove and you’ll be stuck in it forever! It’s truly important to look up anxiety-relieving techniques to put in place quickly every time it flashes into your mind. Be careful, this stuff can really be insidious. You’ve learned your lesson, put in place prevention measures, now move on. Don’t let it rule you.

Original poster
birdiebirdiewoofwoof · 08/04/2019 12:23

Thanks so much all of you, this is really helping. I hadn't locked the windows with the keys before, just had them latched shut, as DS can't manage the handles yet with his little hands (though I daresay he'll surprise me by doing it one day so I need to get prepared now) and DD in theory has enough sense! They're locked now and I'll look into getting restrictors before the hot weather sets in.

OP posts:
managedmis · 08/04/2019 12:24

I'd be the same. It's fine. It's 24/7 with kids, it really is.

HerculesMulligan · 08/04/2019 12:25

Roomba, I know that child too - D?

Birdie, you poor thing. It sounds terrifying. DS (4) wanted to go onto a friend's balcony last week and even though it's highsided I sent DH out with him (I am not good with heights) and couldn't look.

christinarossetti19 · 08/04/2019 12:30

I think the sheer terror of what might have happened and not being able to rid yourself of it is ultimately a evolutionary protective mechanism - it ensures that the young are looked after while their carers still need to do their thinking for them.

Which is for a couple of decades with humans!

Elderflower14 · 08/04/2019 12:32

@bloodywhitecat I have one of those on my bedroom window. DBumbledog likes to climb on my bed and then stand on windowsill and bark at people walking past. I had visions of him whizzing past the dining room window... The window fitters were most amused when I explained what it was for!!

Mummyoflittledragon · 08/04/2019 12:36

Wow what a fright!! I had anti burglary hinges fitted for this reason when dd was little. She is 10 and learnt to open the windows wide a few months ago.

MillicentMartha · 08/04/2019 12:39

The window locks are a good idea, but you must still be able to get out in the event of a fire. You would need to keep the keys easily accessible to you, at least.

fruitbrewhaha · 08/04/2019 12:45

I think in parenting there are many "shit! that was close" moments.

9 is a tricky age, in some ways they are so grown up, but can be idiots too, especially when in a big group, my DD 9 can be such a twit around all her friends.

badg3r · 08/04/2019 12:47

You poor thing. It's shock. I have a couple of memories along similar lines with my DC. After a few years (! - ok maybe this isn't so reassuring!) i can think back without feeling sick but it took a while. As someone upthread said, this is parenting of kids 24/7. Be kind to yourself.