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Original poster

Does anyone have a dad that you think truly would beat up a guy who displeased their daughter?

56 replies

CitrusDreams · 07/04/2019 00:02

Does anyone have a dad that you think truly would beat up a guy who displeased their daughter?

By displeased I mean in the harsher context e.g. men who've dumped the girl, or men who've been a bit creepy, touchy un-wantedly even when told to stop, men who've been bullying the girl etc

Does the father stereotype really hold true in any of your cases or do you think, with few exceptions e.g. very tough ones, gangsters,etc. this isn't really true and there's no way you'd expect him to do it?

By daughter I mean especially if she is an adult daughter.

OP posts:
IckyTummy · 07/04/2019 00:13

I don't think my dad would beat someone up, but I think he could destroy someone's life if he set his mind to it and they truly treated me awfully. Hasn't though!

FraAngelico · 07/04/2019 00:15

No, because he’s not some knuckle-dragging thug, and I’m well able to deal with being dumped, harassed or bullied by myself.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 07/04/2019 00:16

I’d be devastated if I thought my father would beat up anyone. He’s not a Neanderthal and I’m not his property to defend or protect. His job when I am hurt is to comfort me, not satisfy his own (hypothetical as my dad doesn’t have one) desire to swing fists.

ILoveMaxiBondi · 07/04/2019 00:17

My mum doesn’t beat up women either btw.

TemporaryPermanent · 07/04/2019 00:20

Jesus, no.

He was very upset when he heard why I'd split from xh, but he didn't hear it from me and I don't think he thought that punching someone I was already mostly through a proper legal process with would achieve anything. He taught me about the rule of law in the first place.

elQuintoConyo · 07/04/2019 00:23

Not onthd level of those minging 'i've got your back babygirl' memes or 'rules on dating my daughter' t-shirts I've seen Envy puke.

But he has said if I was murdered, by man or woman, he'd hunt them down and kill them Shock no, I'm not Liam Neeson's daughter!

I have aquaintances (Sil's partner, for example) who are totally like this, their 7yo DD even told me 'daddy says I can't have a boyfriend until I'm 40' he's such a massive fucking tool that I avoid him. And the others. Such misogynists.

nancy75 · 07/04/2019 00:26

Honestly, if a man were to hit me or hurt me physically I think it would take a lot to hold my dad back.
He grew up on a rough estate, in a very rough part of London - it’s what he & all of his brothers were brought up to know.
I wouldn’t want or expect him to do it, but I know what his reaction would be to that type of situation

catinboots99 · 07/04/2019 00:39

Are you writing a book?

HunnyCaramel · 07/04/2019 00:42

Yeah i reckon mine wouldve but he led a pretty violent life in general (and died after a fight).

Travellinghappy · 07/04/2019 00:47

When Sarah Payne’s murderer was tried and her dad spent everyday in court my DH said he thought he would really struggle not to have attempted to kill him if that had been our daughter. She was the same age as Sarah.
Neither my dad or DH would beat anyone up for upsetting me or any of our children.

RedHatsDoNotSuitMe · 07/04/2019 03:02

I got (date) raped at 19, and when I told my parents abut it, my DDad said he would like to make it VERY clear to the perpetrator that his behaviour was unacceptable.

He never did it, though and could be wrong, but I always felt like dad thought it was partly brought on by me. But he's dead now, so can't ask-

thornyhousewife · 07/04/2019 08:50

Yes, I grew up in a small working class town and my dad was a hard man with a tough reputation. He'd done prison time before I was born.

Honestly, his influence was a huge positive formative experience for me and I always felt safe and able to take risks. I have extremely strong expectations of men in my life and haven't tolerated any attempt at abuse of me.

Streely · 07/04/2019 08:56

When I was a teenager an acquaintance of my Dad l’s made a sexual remark about me and my Dad knocked him out.

He was never a violent man that I knew of before or after, but like pp have said, he grew up in quite a rough area and it was a sort of ‘pride’ thing to be able to handle yourself and stick up for your own.

I don’t condone violence, btw.

Jackshouse · 07/04/2019 09:00

No.

Btw I would saying a man ending a ending a relationship because they were unhappy is not harsh but is normal and reasonable behaviour. It’s certainly not in the league of sexual assault or rape.

dudsville · 07/04/2019 09:01

My Dad would have done this when he was younger, but he's since grown up and learned a few things about the world.

IntoValhalla · 07/04/2019 09:10

My dad found out that my Dsis’s abusive cunt of an ex had not only been verbally and emotionally abusive, he’d also been physically abusive on more than one occasion.
He went to my Dsis’s house “for dinner” one evening which wasn’t out of the ordinary, but before the fore mentioned cunt arrived home from work, dad and Dsis packed all his belongings into bin bags and put them on the driveway. My dad then called him out on the abusive behaviour and filled him in right there and then. My dad is a pretty big bloke, and I definitely wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end of his right hook Confused
I’m by no means saying that violence is ever a solution to a problem, but I can totally understand why my dad did what he did.

NeverSayFreelance · 07/04/2019 09:16

Oh my Dad definitely would. He is the classic scary dad. Kids at my school would stay away from me because I had "the scary dad". Grin That said, when I chucked my crappy ex, nothing happened lol.

CarolDanvers · 07/04/2019 09:19

I had a friend whose Dad and brother waited for her ex and attacked him one day when he came to pick up his kids. He was a total pig and treated her very badly. It was wrong obviously but I have to admit there's been times with my ex H when I have thought something similar happening might have helped stop or reduce the over a decade of foul abuse I have experienced at his hands since we split. He's a coward at heart.

IWouldPreferNotTo · 07/04/2019 09:21

Definitely not my dad. When I was younger he explained that fighting is almost always an expensive mistake. Get in a fight and end up with a criminal record and it kills your career and all the work you've done to get there.

He always said its better to get a punch in the face and sue the hell out of the other person than get in an incident which can quickly spin out of control

Eatmycheese · 07/04/2019 09:24

My father died several years ago so this is a bit of a pointless answer I supposed, but yes he would.
If anyone had really harmed or damaged or murdered my sister or myself then yes. He was always quite matter of fact about it. I believe if one of us had been taken or suffered something hideous or been murdered then he would have killed whoever was behind it. And he was not a violent man in the slightest. I don’t even recall him ever smacking me as a child

I was treated very badly by an ex boyfriend who let me down at a very hard time and then refused to stop harassing me while I was at home convalescing and beyond. One Sunday afternoon I got a shaky phone call from the ex saying sorry about everything he’d done, and that I would never hear from him again. I never did.
Several years later I found out from my a mutual friend of my ex that my father took it upon himself to drive

  • in the middle of the night - down to London to his place. They wouldn’t go into details but apparently my ex is sill so rattled about what happened that night he won’t grass my dad up even though he’s dead.
My mum said my dad was back home and had calmly eaten his breakfast before I even woke up (was very ill in bed after a miscarriage and pneumonia) . All he said when she asked was “He got the message” Shock
DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 07/04/2019 09:25

I would have liked to have been "that dad", but DD made it plain that she would fight her own battles. Except once, when one of her exes was unwise enough to leave threats of rape and murder on the landline. I rang his mum, and I believe she did things to him that even Vlad Tepes would have shuddered at.

Jessgalinda · 07/04/2019 09:29

Nope. I told my parents that my exh raped me. They are still in contact with him and regularly go visit him and his new girlfriend in their big house. It had to be big as they have 4 kids between them. They even helped him move.

Meanwhile I moved to a tiny terraced in a shit part of town and my best friend and her brother helped me move. Worked out ok though. After a couple of years The brother became my dp.

I have no contact with my parents at all

Redred2429 · 07/04/2019 09:31

My dad has once lost his temper with an ex but that was cause he lifted his hands to me no other time would my dad do that

Burlea · 07/04/2019 09:31

Our DD married a man who at first was great, but then got into drugs and money troubles then started to use her as a punch bag. She didn't tell us her worries until one day the balifs came to turf her and 3 children out. Her mild mannered dad chased her husband around town but by the time he had found him thank goodness DH had calmed down. I do think if he had found him he would of killed her DH.

Jessgalinda · 07/04/2019 09:32

On the flip side my daughter was assaulted. I saw the person that did it a few days later and I really wanted to RIP his throat out. He had destroyed my daughter. I didnt though, because I wasnt going to let my actions impact the legal consquences he was facing.

But, yeah, I saw my precious daughter be broken by someone. And I wanted to hurt him like he hurt her.