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Original poster

Idiotic things you've done while sleep deprived

82 replies

YellowRibboninHerHair · 29/03/2019 18:45

I ordered a toaster and kettle set at 4.33 the other morning, it seemed a great buy to start with and had money off, yeepee thought I.

It's a fucking toy set.

Arsebiscuits.

OP posts:
SAMlady · 29/03/2019 21:30

Attempted nappy change on chopping board instead of changing mat

Came home from water babies with wet bikini bottoms on under my clothes, dripping and soaked through my shorts

Lindy2 · 29/03/2019 21:32

I've pointed my car key fob at my front door before expecting it to unlock. It doesn't 😂

Sizeofalentil · 29/03/2019 21:33

Tried to breastfeed the cat.

Almost got him to latch as well

Minkies11 · 29/03/2019 21:34

Brought cat food to work instead of my lunch Blush
We make food for them at home and put in tupperware. Grabbed pollack and trout instead of my kidney bean salad. Yuk. I was nearly hungry enough to stuffed my face eat it.

Pixie2015 · 29/03/2019 21:36

Took my make-up off with a flash wipe - did a good job

Fuppy · 29/03/2019 21:58

I tried to pay for my shopping with my gas card. Alarms went off and I had to have a member of staff help me before I realised what I'd done.

RhymingRabbit · 29/03/2019 22:06

Wander off leaving my car door wide open and my handbag on the front seat. Stayed like that for about 20 mins whilst I took daughter to nursery and chatted to staff. Got back to my car and a lovely dog walker was standing guard at my car.

I put the contents of a sachet of cat food in the washing powder drawer of my washing machine.

Took the remote control to work instead of my phone.

I really really don't function well when I'm tired.

Crochetcrochetcrochet · 29/03/2019 22:07

Keys in the fridge, cheese in my handbag. Woke husband up in the middle of the night sobbing that I'd lost the baby. The baby who was asleep in the crib next to me.
Opened the door to the postman with a boob still out, and baby over the other shoulder.

Cakeandmarshmallows · 29/03/2019 22:14

@Sizeofalentil I laughed so hard at this, while trying to keep quiet coz of sleeping baby, I farted loudly instead waking up the cat who was asleep next to me! I've not tried to breastfeed her yet though...

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/03/2019 22:39

Turned over in bed, lifting baby ds very carefully, supporting his head - except it was a teddy bear, not a baby.

Clevs · 29/03/2019 22:58

Pulled up behind a car waiting for the lights to change. Except that there were no traffic lights and it was a parked car.

Pinkpanther473 · 29/03/2019 23:02

I remember emptying the washing machine and finding a wet, strangely intact, clean looking disposable nappy...I guess that went in the washing machine and the baby gro went in the nappy bin..

Spottedboxfish · 30/03/2019 02:23

On the way home after a 10 day stay helping DD with toddler and non-sleeping baby, I bought a sandwich and a drink in a supermarket in Kings Cross station. Sat down after as I was early and after about 15 mins stood up and realised I hadn’t got my suitcase. Sheer panic. Luckily a member of staff had taken it to lost property and I had time to go get it back before I got the train. It was only because said member of staff heard me asking the security guy If a suitcase had been handed in that I found out where it was because security guy had told me he wasn’t aware of anything. How it took me so long to realise i didn’t have it with me was a reflection of my sheer exhaustion.

HJE17 · 30/03/2019 02:41

I walked into a mirror, because I saw the reflection of the floor in it.

JumpingFrogs · 30/03/2019 02:42

Stumbled into dark nursery at 3 a.m. to comfort crying baby. Paced around room with baby in arms, her head on my shoulder. It was only when I went to put her back into her cot that I realised I was holding her upside down, and it was actually her feet resting on my shoulder, and her head was dangling down by my waist. She was comfy enough to have been lulled back to sleep in that position though!

TurtleTree · 30/03/2019 02:44

Tried to take a photo of DS on my phone, and was frustrated that the picture wasn't focusing, despite telling the phone where to focus. Realised I was tapping DS's head, not the image on the phone. Laughed hysterically. Tried again to take the photo. Tapped his head again.

FenellaMaxwell · 30/03/2019 02:45

Filled the washing machine full of tiny white newborn stuff, then emptied my coffee into the drawer instead of the washing liquid.

Also washing related - put a load of washing in front of the machine ready to put on. Went to put it in the machine a short while later and it wouldn’t go in. The bath mat in particular was being really unwieldy and I tried it at a few different angles but it kept wiggling...... then I realised I was trying to stuff out rather bemused small white fluffy dog in the machine along with the towels and bath mats! In my defence, she could have chosen a more sensible place for a nap!

chocolateavocado99 · 30/03/2019 02:54

Washed my face with nail varnish remover. At least I had put it on a cotton pad beforehand.

Poppins2016 · 30/03/2019 02:55

Wondered why my dry shampoo wasn't quite right... Then realised it was deodorant.

Asked DH to 'turn on' (i.e. open) the window.

Rocking the pram with one hand... While holding the baby in the other arm.

Put (disposable) nappies in the washing machine with clothes.

Seniorschoolmum · 30/03/2019 03:01

Got off a plane after long transatlantic business trip and drove home - to my childhood home where I hadn’t lived for 17 years.

Decided I needed a holiday.

sirmione16 · 30/03/2019 03:17

Put my phone in the fridge. Couldn't find it for ages.

FrenchFancie · 30/03/2019 06:48

I was v sleep deprived in tescos after Dd was born. Baby crying so I’m swaying doing the whole ‘shhhh’ / pat thing, when the checkout lady asked to scan the bag of potatoes. I was rocking the potatoes to sleep and it was someone else’s baby crying.

paranoiamumma · 30/03/2019 07:04

Went to the shop on way home from night shift , left purse in glove box , got back in car frantically searching for the purse , wasn't there ! Must be at home! went to put keys in ignition wouldn't fit , quick glance around car revealed a sparkly clean car , it wasn't mine I got in a different car , different make colour .

( to be fair when the door opened with out me unlocking , I even thought swore I locked it)

HicDraconis · 30/03/2019 08:14

Fell asleep driving home and sailed through red lights.
Fell asleep driving home and went 3 junctions past my M25 turnoff before veering on to the hard shoulder.

Junior doctor.

Baby feeding sleep deprivation was easy in comparison!

Mmmhmmokdear · 30/03/2019 08:23

Tried to unlock my locker at work with my car key fob.

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