If you’ve got primary aged kids and work everyday how do you do it???

[OhDear2200]

I’ve just increased my work from 2 days a week to working everyday (only 2 full days rest just school hours).

I’m dying here! Housework, hobbies, homework, walking dog, attempting to keep fit.

Please give me your tips!

Will I just get used to it? Or do I just accept the house will be a shit tip? Or I don’t get any sleep?

Please don’t suggest buying in cleaner as the whole point of me working more is to bring more income in!

Some of you are machines!

Respect to the full time workers!

As much as I would love to go back FT (for my career) it won’t be happening in the near future due to my oldest having special needs. He needs me at home.

It frustrates me massively as I watch less qualified and less able people take over me in management.

I sound like a moaning Minnie.

Think I just need to focus on what’s going well!

Ah yes, I’ve had to turn down promotions offered as I just can’t do the travel or extra hours so it’s gone to a less able person who’s then managed me - but there’s only so much you can cope with.

I’ve tried leaning in and just ended up an exhausted wreck!

2 dc primary aged, 1 dc teenage. DH works in to the evening most days. I work FT and leave the house at 5.30.
Be strict and keep to routines.
Every child has a job to do. Good things (tv, wii, treats) only happen if chores and homework are done.
Stick to the basics in the week. Catch up on the weekend. Laundry is all done in one day thanks to the 1 hr wash setting. Everyone has a basket of clothes to put away at the end of that day. As a pp said, have enough uniform to last a week minimum (second hand and hand me downs are the way to go!).

It's ok for some meals to be mega simple on busy evenings - omelettes, beans on toast, etc. One night of 'freezer crap' food is ok too 😜

Both FT here. Outsourcing is the main thing...so childminder feeds DC and drops them to us at 6 (leaves reading, 20 minutes down time, bath, milk and story, bed for 8). We eat after. Cleaner (fine if you can’t afford but otherwise of course your standards or free time will slip...my standards have slipped regardless!). Online shop. Admin at lunchtime. DH who does 50%.

My key ‘trick’ is that I always do one chore before I leave the house (DH drops DC to childminder and I have about 5 minutes). Only one, mind! So this morning I emptied the dishwasher that had run overnight. Yesterday I changed our bed. Etc etc.

Good luck!

No sleep. Well - around 4-5 hours a night, every night. I'm a teacher so thank God for the holidays so every 6-7 weeks I can stop, regroup, reset, do everything that needs doing in the house and then dive in again. With 5 kids and a DH who works abroad most weeks, it's relentless and I'm pretty sure I'm not doing a great job at all!

I'm a self employed mum with hubby who works all hours! I work every day during school hours, so weekends I clean/washing/and try entertain the child. It's not easy and I feel I'm always tired but I do love my life and husband is amazing when he is home! It does become normal.... To be busy! When I do have time to myself I get bored xx

Single mum here, full time primary teacher and 3DC. My eldest DD is 26, don't know what I'd do without her tbh! My 2 youngest are 8 and 12.
Gave up years ago trying to have a tidy house! We're all alive, healthy & happy and here for each other.

I was married to my youngest's dad, was with him for 4 years, that's the only time I've EVER lived with someone. It was just like having a 4th child, so - no thanks.

I'm constantly tired, but I'm completely used to it (also have B12 deficiency which doesn't help). There aren't enough hours in a day.

Oh and Red Bull (and cheap supermarket variants) are my friends 😁

I wouldn't have my life any other way!

I do it pretty badly.

My grand plans of a chicken, veg and potatoes dinner is now turning into chicken wraps followed by icecream and banana.

don't do homework with them. It's for the children to do by themselves and if it's too difficult to do then that's the teacher's fault and it just doesn't get done

Just accept that this is the way things will be whilst your children are young. Don’t compare yourself to others. That’s a huge mistake. Happy and well adjusted children are the most important thing. And then start them doing chores as soon as they get older!

We have a cleaner. That's a big help.
Laundry at the weekends only if possible.
Limited clubs in the week.
No hobbies!
No exercise.

I work full time, but i work 4 days from home. This makes a huge difference. So if it is even possible for you to negotiate a day at home it will help. It means I can put a meal on in the instant pot and run a load of washing and crucially i can do a lunchtime run or gym class. We also have a cleaner which is a great help to keep things on an even keel. The house still gets messy but at least it is clean.

I would love to have a regular job sometimes where I work five days a week, and I dream of how much stuff I could get done. As it happened I'm self employed, work a ridiculous amount of hours, and somehow the house is clean and tidy, washing is usually done and ironed, we have a cooked meal every day and I haven't passed out yet! It's just about being organised and successfully multi tasking often. I often find myself giving the bathroom sink a wipe over while I clean my teeth, or doing another job while tea is cooking. Dp does quite a lot of "household" stuff. DS does four activities a week, I do two, dp often goes out for whole days with his hobby. We don't have a dog, as definitely no time for that! DS does help around the house and has since he was about 4 years old. Even little ones can pair socks and out them in drawers. Everyone should be pitching in.

Cleaner, online food shop, brilliant childminder and a reasonable sharing of drops offs / pick ups to after school activities.

An understanding boss and flexible working for when it all goes tits up.

Plus lowish standards and too many takeaways when we are both knackered.

A partner that does 50%, a cleaner, flexible job, being ridiculously organised and not sweating the small stuff.

After school clubs, low standards, batch cooking, on line shopping, insanity and exhaustion.

It's very hard work. I'm the same as you, DH works long hours so I'm juggling work and family stuff every weekday. I'm exhausted!

Top tips:

• Easy meals. Either batch cook and freeze or something from the extensive 'pasta with some protein and veggies chucked in' list.
• Slightly later bedtimes to accommodate homework. Mine are night owls anyway and it's amazing how keen they are on their reading etc if the alternative is bed!
• Outlook calendar invites and reminders for everything, dress up day, play dates, clubs etc.
• Evening prep for the morning. Uniforms out, packed lunch ready, breakfast table set.

But it's definitely a struggle. A lot of my friends are SAHMs and I am so tempted, but for various reasons we just need me to work.

I Have always worked full time but am
Now a single parent.

My saviours are:

An Ikea kallax in the kitchen diner with a box each for uniforms. No putting it away only to get it out again. Quick to grab in the morning.

Bulk cook casserole / sauce type dishes and free in portions. I also now used frozen rice bags and frozen veg portion bags.

A cleaner - you say the idea of going back full time is to earn extra money but mine costs £70 a month for 3 hours every other week - that may still be justified against the extra income of your extra hours.

Get up early and get stuff done before they wake. Seems to be a more productive time of day for me.

Exercise is out - not that I ever did much anyway!

Both work FT. Two primary aged DC.
Home by 5. 5-5:30 Any homework. 5:30-6 Dinner. One DC then does music practice. We read to the other. Upstairs for bath at 6:30. Before they go upstairs the kids have to tidy up their own toys and help us tidy up downstairs in general.

• In bed by 6:50ish. Younger one falls asleep. The other parent reads to the older one who then reads to himself.
• batch cook on weekend. I then cook in bulk on Wednesday night. I am a decent cook and I can cook quickly
• yes we have a cleaner
• I get the kids to tidy up with me before they go upstairs. One of us does bath time and the other finishes all chores downstairs and warms up dinner.
• Come down and finish chores together between 7:30-8. This includes dishwasher, laundry, making sure the downstairs is tidy, putting out the bins; any online shopping to be done.
• 8-8:30 Dinner
• family admin after dinner. And both of us usually work an hour or so afterwards because we both leave work early a couple of times a week to come home by 5 pm. So work till 10. Collapse.
• Up at 6. Get breakfast ready. So packed lunch. Shower. Get kids up.

We have a VERY busy Monday-Friday and we are both asleep not long after 10. But this allows us to not leave too much housework for the weekend. I batch cook and DH irons for the week but otherwise we try and finish everything in the week.

Kids only do music during the week- nanny takes them. We have a nanny from 8-5 during the week. Other extra curricular activities on the weekend- mainly swimming and tennis.

No dog but..

• Uniform washed at the weekend and then hung in sets so 2 hangers with dress, tshirt, cardi, knickers and tights on, 3 hangers with Tshirt,.knickers tights. She wears dress and cardi several.days in a row then swaps,.new tshirt/tights knickers daily

• Lunches made the night before and stuck in the fridge
• Batch cook once a month to fill the freezer

Its still a battle to fit everything in, but stuff like the above helps to.make the daily jobs a little quicker.

Washing up for the day is all.done after dinner.
Tumble dryer is a godsend so clothes are dried quick year round even when its too cold/wet to put them outside.

The Key is to be as minimalistic as possible. Meal plan and clean the kitchen and bathrooms everyday. I also do a quick hoover and a load of washing everyday. Get DH and DC (if older enough) to chip in. Your have it sorted in no time.

Au pairs for us, basically. It's a great solution but obviously you do need a spare room and to be happy having someone else living with you (and to accept you'll have the occasional not-so-good one).

Not saying the house is tidy, but it's tidier and also means DH get time out together regularly so helps keep us sane!

Exercise: accept it's probably not realistic for both of you to get your exercise in more than twice a week unless you're prepared to get up early enough to go before work (DH still has some trouble accepting this)

Ditto you probably can't have more than one weeknight commitment each on top of that.

Oh yes, enough uniform to last all week, then off and washed on Friday evenings.

@OhDear2200
“Comparison is the Thief of Joy”
Don’t look at your friends tidy houses. Don’t compare yourself. It’s the only way to stay sane/happy.