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Original poster

How does this wedding sound?

70 replies

Firstty · 07/03/2019 11:53

Wedding for around 180 guests. Barn venue (ceremony and evening spent here). April so may be inside all day. Food- canapés (4 each), starter = sharing platter of local meats, cheeses and chutneys. Main- hog roast served with 3 salads and a potato dish (goats cheese and red pepper tarts for veggies), dessert brownie (or possibly more sweet canapés), evening- a fajita bar. Drink all free- we will have fizz handed out with canapés and toast. Large buckets of ice with beers, wine and soft fizzy drinks. A few bottles of spirits too. Wine and water served with meal. Will then have a makeshift bar that guests(and us!) take it in turns to man for 30 mins.

How does this sound to you? What would you/wouldn't you like about it? If you got an invitation which asked you to name your favourite tipple on the rsvp would you be annoyed? (just so we don't end up with loads of red wine but run out of white, and can make sure we have any specially requested spirits etc)

OP posts:
Original poster
Firstty · 07/03/2019 12:59

Also, while I have so many helpful people here - entertainment and timing.

We were thinking ceremony at 1ish - so thats all done by 2. Get the canape's out sharpish and start other food around 4 - evening guests arrive at 6.30-7. Fajita bar at 8.30. Curfew is at 11.

Entertainment - magician from ceremony to food (mainly for kids). Wedding band for an hour or so after food then DJ.

(I know what the MN view on evening guests is but the wedding is really near where we live and we have lots of colleagues that we would like to invite and won't be offended!)

OP posts:
Original poster
Firstty · 07/03/2019 13:00

The caterers do offer a bbq for that many people.

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 07/03/2019 13:09

Majestic do wine on sale or return and also hire glasses. we have used them for a number of parties we have had. They were very good and will deliver to you.

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General food Weddings
FiddleFaddleDingDong · 07/03/2019 13:12

Yes, Majestic Wines are great for these occasions.

Original poster
Firstty · 07/03/2019 13:12

Oh thanks Apollo - do you know if they will pick up the next day?

OP posts:
milienhaus · 07/03/2019 13:14

Sounds good to me and similar to what we’re planning (so I would say that wouldn’t I...).

Just one point on the French booze cruise thing - you might need to get it in before Brexit or face customs on the way back in!

LittleKitty1985 · 07/03/2019 13:17

Perhaps ask your caterers if you can hire glasses etc from them? That's what we did. Keeping the number of suppliers to a minimum will make things easier for you.

For entertainment, we hired a caricaturist and giant board games. Both went down really well.

mildshock · 07/03/2019 13:20

Waitrose offer free glass hire!

Original poster
Firstty · 07/03/2019 13:20

Giant board and caricaturist! sounds great! Where did you find them?

OP posts:
LadyPeach · 07/03/2019 13:20

Not sure I'd be too keen to work the bar.

Other than that it sounds like the norm to me. As in can't really go wrong :)

BrieAndChilli · 07/03/2019 13:23

weddingdrinks.co.uk gives you a calculation of how much alchohol you need. you can put in total guests, number of non drinkers, number of children, number of heavy drinkers etc

LondonBelongsToMe · 07/03/2019 13:25

free glass hire only works if you're buying the booze from them! glasses combined with sale or return on un-drunk bottles might make it more economical than a run to France and being left with un-drunk red.

FGS don't ask people's favourite drinks on the invitiation!

LittleKitty1985 · 07/03/2019 13:25

Giant board and caricaturist! sounds great! Where did you find them?

On gumtree. We actually found most of the things/people for our wedding on there Smile

Meet0nTheledge · 07/03/2019 13:26

I agree about sharing platters not being great with strangers, also that a bar person would be a very good idea. How about asking guests to indicate a preference from red or white wine, lager, bitter or soft drinks rather than asking them to name a drink.

I also think a ceremony at 1 followed by food at 4 is too big a gap, I know people like to chat, but that's a long time, especially if standing.

Original poster
Firstty · 07/03/2019 14:22

How about ceremony at 1, food at 3? My thinking behind leaving food til 4 was that guests will have had canapes at 2ish. However, now I've realised that the kids will need to eat lunch at some point. How will I shovel food into my 2 year old at 12 while trying to get her and me ready for getting married at 1. Oh dear lord.

OP posts:
Meet0nTheledge · 07/03/2019 14:34

I'd go for ceremony at 2, food at 4 rather than 1 and 3. Then guests have time for a little lunch beforehand.

crosstalk · 07/03/2019 14:50

Another one saying don't ask for favourite drinks - far too much, far too complicated for bar staff with 160 and wait till ten of those 160 ask for a proper Bloody Mary with celery salt, lea and perrins, a celery stick and tabasco, lemon and ice. Beer, cider, red/white wine, appropriate glasses, soft drinks and ice. That's the max you should do.

If you can change it to 2 or 2.30 for service, canapes at 3.30pm and food at 5 it seems more convenient esp for those with children .. with the bbq at 9?

Good luck OP, but don't waste a fortune on those who want their favourite tipple ...

.

anniehm · 07/03/2019 15:10

Sounds great, though depending on your timing I may be tempted to miss the starter altogether and have more canapés. Also regarding drinks - make sure you have interesting soft drinks as it will mean people drink less alcohol potentially and too often for soft drinks it's just sweet sugary drinks.

purpleleotard · 07/03/2019 15:19

So the ceremony at 1, means people will arrive at 12:30 or so.
A couple of mouth fulls of canapés to last until 4pm.
Will you be expecting your guests to have eaten a late breakfast or if travelling stopping somewhere for an early lunch?
Can any guest be expected to be continuously involved from 12:30 to 11:00 pm, 10 1/2 hours? Stuck in one large room.
Sharing plates are fraught with one person taking too much not leaving enough for others.

choli · 07/03/2019 15:47

As a lot of people avoid pork for religious reasons, maybe a beef or chicken alternative?

TheFlis12345 · 07/03/2019 15:48

One warning on glasses. Most of the places that do free hire (e.g. supermarkets) require you to return them clean and dry. As someone told me, nothing takes the shine off the first day of married life like having to spend it cleaning 500 glasses! I would highly recommend paying to hire from somewhere where you can return them dirty. Glass hire is pretty cheap and it’s well worth it!

EveryoneFreeze · 07/03/2019 16:07

In America it is absolutely standard to have an open bar and I think it is so much nicer and more gracious, if you can afford it. Most venues just charge a flat fee per adult, which evens out bc some people get completely drunk and others don’t drink at all. One way to keep it a bit less expensive is to limit the drinks to beer and wine or have one or a few “signature cocktails.” Just google it and you will find tons of ideas. It’s cheaper and easier and if you choose well you can please most people.
I think your idea of having friends man the bar is nice but ultimately will be messy and wasteful, and the drinks may not be very good :). There is a lot more to running bar than pouring drinks — keeping everything stocked, managing clean/dirty glassware, having the right things ready at the right time (champagne for the toast, wine for the meal, etc.)

Here is what I would do, if it is within your budget:
—Serve one white wine, one red wine, two or three types of beer, and a couple of signature cocktails. (Try to choose different cocktails so most people will have something they like.) Don’t forget lots of soft drinks and juice for the non-drinkers, and champagne for the toasts. You don’t need anything else. This will please 99% of people and the rest will manage to have fun anyway.
—Do not ask people for requests with the invitation. I know you want to be gracious but this is 180 people, not a dinner party. You do NOT want to be obligated to buy your BFF’s boyfriend’s favorite brand of beer and creme de menthe for Uncle Elmore’s grasshopper and 178 other random items.
—Many places will let you buy wine/spirits on consignment. Find a place that does this and use a credit card to buy WAY more than you need and return the rest. It will be a large net order so you should be able
to find a place near you to do it and deliver and pickup the leftovers.
—Hire two professional bartenders to man the bar. If the cocktails are not pre-mixed you will need more than two and even if they are it will be a long day. 180 is a lot of people. Make sure the people you hire feel confident that they can keep the bar stocked and drinks flowing without keeping anyone waiting more than a few minutes. Negotiate a low (but fair) rate of pay and two them you will put out a tip jar, and since British people are used to paying for drinks at weddings anyway the bartenders may do pretty well.
—You MUST hire glasses and have people to clean up empty ones continually as the day goes on. You can ask friends to help with this but I bet you could find two local teenagers who would be happy to do it for a pretty low rate.

Enjoy!

PrismGuile · 07/03/2019 16:11

Sounds fantastic to me!

greendale17 · 07/03/2019 16:19

Your food menu is quite bog standard. I would be disappointed to eat that

NotExactlyHappyToHelp · 07/03/2019 16:31

Sounds lovely but if I were you I’d look into the possibility of street food vans for hire.

I went to a wedding where they had a fish & chip van, a pizza van and a crepe van and it was amazing! Everyone got exactly what they fancied and the veggies didn’t get their food scoffed by the meat eaters.