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Original poster

How do you “over” indulge your children?!

83 replies

Mmmmbrekkie · 01/03/2019 16:56

I’ve just run a bath for my DS. Perfect temp, dimmed light, lit candle, bath pillow, glass of milk and book on the side.

He’s 8 years old.

He has football on a Friday and comes home exhausted and filthy. Straight in bath and then every Friday, pizza in front of a film, followed by bowl of popcorn for him and his sister whilst I scratch her legs (don’t ask).

What do you do that really is a bit over indulgent?!

OP posts:
millythepink · 01/03/2019 18:33

Yes it does MrsPratchett. Sometimes DD will notice that I look tired and will put together a simple meal to save me cooking, or she'll often make a pot of tea for us to share. When we're out together she'll often link arms with me when we're walking and likes to treat me to a fancy Starbucks frappe.

Juststopit · 01/03/2019 18:35

Little treats here and there especially if they are studying hard. Sorting out bedrooms and tidying up. And bigger treats sometimes like tickets to a show. Love spoiling them every now and then. Hope they remember it when they are choosing my care home!!

SeaViewBliss · 01/03/2019 18:36

I drive my DS (14) to school most daysShock

To be fair, he has some school based anxiety issues but also he’s perfectly capable of riding his bike. He does walk home so not a complete precious.

I also let him have KFC if he asks (about once a fortnight) and we watch films in my bed because the TV in my room is bigger than his!

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SeaViewBliss · 01/03/2019 18:37

I forgot about my DD (20). If she’s coming home for a weekend I always get her some vegan food that is too expensive for her own budget.

JayneyMc4 · 01/03/2019 18:42

Most of these are lovely, but I think constantly cleaning up after and breakfast in bed for teenagers is a bit much, they do need to learn responsibility; what about when they go to uni? It's nice to treat but not be a slave; there's a difference.

WifOfBif · 01/03/2019 18:42

This is such a lovely thread.

My son plays football on a Wednesday and always comes home to a bubble bath and his towel and pyjamas warming on the radiator and a snack ready for afterwards. He also gets a foot massage in bed while we have a chat about life, he’s 9 and struggling with school and this is when he opens up the most.

My daughter gets her back tickled as she falls asleep and a new Peppa Pig magazine every now and again.

My mum used to do things like those mentioned for us and we always felt so loved.

HaroldsSocalledBluetits · 01/03/2019 18:44

Mine are teens and I cook them porridge in the morning even though they are more than capable of making it themselves and also even though they could have cereal instead. It's their favourite breakfast so why not. Run a bath for them when they're tired and weary. Sometimes they even get some of my posh bubble bath. Make them nice whittard hot chocolate with mini marshmallows and squirty cream. Warm their clothes on the radiator. Leave messages on alexa telling them I love them.

Strokethefurrywall · 01/03/2019 18:46

My mum still does little things like this every time I go back to the UK for a visit. She'll leave me packets of facewipes, notebooks, nail varnish that I can't get here, trinkets and those little poem cards that say "what is a daughter?" - I've lived abroad 11 years so you can imagine how many of those little cards I've got.

I probably do loads of over indulgent stuff for my kids (7&4) but the one that springs to mind is if they're in the pool in the winter months and come out chilly (Caribbean here), then I warm two towels each in the tumble dryer so they can each be snuggly and warm.

soupmaker · 01/03/2019 18:54

I've always thought I was a bit rubbish at indulging the kids but I;

Warm PJs on radiators
Warm towels for after showers
Give DD 11 a head massage when washing her hair every other week
Tickle the kids feet when they snuggle in to watch a film
Make them hot chocolate whenever they ask
Always turn down beds, close curtains, pop a hot water bottle in on chilly nights, put on fairy lights before they go to bed

I'm not so bad!

Howmanysleepstilchristmas · 01/03/2019 18:59

God, I feel mean!
Erm... I warm uniforms on cold days and will buy occasional books/ clothes if I see something they’d like. But generally I’m just ferrying them about and cooking/ cleaning.

OhioOhioOhio · 01/03/2019 19:03

Heating the inside of their wellies up with the hairdryer.

AhFeck · 01/03/2019 19:17

Every month we take toddler DS to the shop and let him buy any toy he wishes. I love seeing him waddle out of the shop holding a huge box with a grin on his face. In the past we have been completely on our arses money-wise so I'm just so grateful and proud that we can do this for him.

AnneElliott · 01/03/2019 19:18

I warm DS with my hairdryer when I dry my hair. He lays on my bed and pretends to be a kitten (he's 12!) while I dry him with the warm air.

Hot water bottle in bed and a car blanket that he gets under if it's chilly in the morning.

BlueMerchant · 01/03/2019 19:27

Make rooms cosy with their lamps, hot water bottles and often a little treat- small toy or new book on their beds. Half hour before lights-out I'll go up with hot chocolate and marshmallow( I know!) or warm milk.
I also often kick OH out of bed as dd likes to sleep with meBlush

17CherryTreeLane · 01/03/2019 19:31

I feel like a terrible mother! Does standing watching 2 football matches every weekend come rain or shine count?? I'm in Scotland, where the weather is awful, in case that gives me extra points!

Original poster
Mmmmbrekkie · 01/03/2019 19:35

As soon as I posted I thought that I might get lots saying I was setting my children up to be pampered princesses. Nice to know I’m not alone.

It’s the free stuff that is lovely. I remember that with my parents. Stuff can be brought and given but it’s knowing that your mum thought you might be a bit chilly so pops a hot water bottle under your bed covers whilst you were in the bathroom getting ready for bed; it’s your dad having a hot chocolate and a butter hot cross bun ready for you when you walk in late from hockey practise. I remember that rather than the presents.

I love these posts, they give me a little warm glow.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mmmmbrekkie · 01/03/2019 19:36

@17CherryTreeLane

Bloody hell, in my book it does!!

OP posts:
Christmasfairy07 · 01/03/2019 19:42

During halfterm I let DD10 have extra screen time but unfortunately it’s come back to bite me on the bum as she’s getting really hooked on some of the games. We had the delights of a full on tantrum, including kicking DH & sweeping everything off the kitchen worktop earlier because she had to come off the laptop. ( Just to say she has attachment disorder & problems regulating her emotions so we do let stuff go but hitting/kicking is an absolute no no).
I can’t think of specific things but she’s an only child & the centre of our world. Do sometimes think a few more treats would be good.

Catscratchclub · 01/03/2019 19:44

I love this thread so much! Ds just asked what I was reading and I said I was getting ideas for how to spoil him - he said “oh mummy, you are very lovely to me!”

We have TLC evenings where I light candles in the bathroom and run a bath, Ds has a face mask 🙈 clean warm pjs and then we snuggle under a blanket.

I write him little notes before I goto bed so he wakes up to a message from me too.

dontknowwhattodo80 · 01/03/2019 19:51

@Mmmmbrekkie , I call DS1 (15) my little prince Grin. DH likens me to the Mum in Gavin and Stacy. I am a bit of a soft touch and DS1 lavishes the attention !

DS2 (10) is much more independent and looks mortified if I ever call him any endearing name Grin. I'm hoping that'll improve with age..

MrsJBaptiste · 01/03/2019 20:00

My two are 12 and 14 and I still...

Run their showers every morning and get the breakfast things on the table ready for the mad rush before school.

Make their packed lunches every morning but TBH my mum always made my dad's pack up so i feel this is just a normal thing to do.

I also allow them to spend far too much money on V Bucks... 🤐

SauvingnonBlanketyBlanc · 01/03/2019 20:05

Nothing out of the ordinary but I greet ds 5 at home time with a small bag of sweets,yes I know fruit would be better but it's a little bit of joy for him at the end of the school day.I also let him have cartoons before dinner so he can relax and wind down

TinklyLittleLaugh · 01/03/2019 20:07

Run their showers every morning

How does that work? Surely your kid just turns it nand gets in? Hmm

This thread has gone a little boaky for me.

BlueMerchant · 01/03/2019 20:17

Yes MrsJ- I forgot about the V Bucks.

SongforSal · 01/03/2019 20:24

Mine are 14 and 18. Eldest at Uni, but when home still receives the same treatment:

Taking a bacon and egg sandwich and a cup of tea to their rooms to wake them up on a weekend.

Occasionally hide notes in lunchboxes to remind them to be their best self's. Recently went to see eldest at Uni, and I wrote a note on her calendar for the 1st of March-she saw it today when she turned the page and messaged me :)

Will run bath and lay out PJ's for the 14yr old whilst making him his favourite junk food/or letting him order his favourite takeaway to eat in front on the TV if I think he needs a bit of TLC.