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No offers from chosen schools. DD in pieces. Please help!

52 replies

MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 08:56

In a bit of a panic! DD has not been offered a place at any of the schools we put down. Instead she has been offered a place at one of the worst schools in the country.
She has anxiety and trichotillomania and was desperate to stay with her two best friends (both got in to her chosen school except her). She is in pieces, I'm in shock and don't know what to do.
I'm going to try to appeal but I don't know what her chances are and I'm prepared to home school her rather than accept the place we have been offered.
I'm just after some advice really. Best way to get her a chance of getting in, things to bring up at appeal, next steps etc.
I can't bloody believe it! We went to six open evenings, spent hours looking at schools etc only for no place at a single decent school. Argh!

OP posts:
BuildAParsnip · 01/03/2019 08:59

Ring the council and get on the waiting lists. There's usually lots of movement and so a high chance she'll get in.

EduCated · 01/03/2019 09:00

Ok, first things first, breathe.

Check that you are on the waiting lists for all of your preferred schools.

Consider also whether you want to appeal. At secondary it’s about showing that the prejudice to your daughter in not being offered a place is greater than the prejudice to the school in having to take another pupil.

I’d suggest posting in the Secondary Education board with ‘appeal’ in your thread title and one of the wonderful admissions experts will be along to help.

EduCated · 01/03/2019 09:01

Also you have literally nothing to lose by accepting the place. Even if you decide to appeal or homeschool. Accept for now to keep your options open.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Floralnomad · 01/03/2019 09:02

As above and also have a look at inter high which is an online school for HE , it does cost but it’s not too expensive .

aintnothinbutagstring · 01/03/2019 09:05

Was the worst school your catchment school? Just wondering what their logic was for giving you that.

PanelChair · 01/03/2019 09:07

First of all, unless you’re in a position to home educate, accept the place you’ve been offered, so that she at least has a place for September.

For an appeal, assemble all the evidence you can of why this school is the best fit for your child - what’s on the curriculum, extra curricular activities, pastoral care, whatever. Staying with friends from primary is not usually grounds for appeal, but in your daughter’s instance you can argue that it would help her settle and receive ongoing support. This will carry a lot more weight if her doctor provides a letter saying that in their professional opinion she needs a place at this school.

mummymayhem18 · 01/03/2019 09:07

Sorry for the bad news but are you not in the catchment areas for the schools you chose ?

EduCated · 01/03/2019 09:10

Was the worst school your catchment school? Just wondering what their logic was for giving you that.

It will have been the nearest school with a place available once all other places had been allocated. There’s no logic to it as such beyond that.

VeryFoolishFay · 01/03/2019 09:15

I appealed for my DD on social inclusion grounds to a highly popular school. (we had just moved to a tiny village from a town and every kid in the village was getting on a bus in the opposite direction).

The county offered me advice on appeals - don't run down the other schools but stress the importance to your DD of the benefits of this particular school.
I hand delivered the appeal to the school on closing day, got a phone call the next day and she started a week later. The general story was that the head was impressed by parents who went to the trouble of appealing and rarely turned them down. It may be different now (this was 10 years ago) but that's my experience.
Hope all works out you both.

MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 09:21

They offered it as it is the closest but there is hardly any distance between that school and her preferred one. Literally a couple of streets :(
I've gotten through to the council, double checked I'm on the waiting list and now waiting to begin the appeals process. They took children from up to 1.5 miles away and we're (barely) 1.6 miles away.
I'm not going to accept the place as she cannot go there and someone else may need it more than us. I'm in a position to home educate if necessary but just have no idea how long it would need to be for.
Feel terrible for sending her in so upset. Thanks for all the replies.

OP posts:
titchy · 01/03/2019 09:24

Id accept the place even though you know you won't use it. Rejecting it might be seen as antagonistic by an appeals panel.

LIZS · 01/03/2019 09:24

It would seem strange not to have qualified for a place at any of the six listed. Were at least one or two of them "safe" or are they perhaps further away than allocated one or with specific priority entry criteria which you did not meet. Your LA letter should be specific about the refusals. Do any have a health or social needs category?

Gazelda · 01/03/2019 09:25

I have absolutely zero expertise in this area, other than what I've picked up while going through this process. So forgive me if I'm giving duff advice.

But from everything I've read, it is essential to accept the place you've been offered. If you don't, the LEA will assume you are making your own arrangements and won't consider you for any other schools if places come up. In other words, accept the place, stay on the waiting lists and consider an appeal. I really think it's a bad idea to decline the place as it (I think) takes you out of the whole system.

LIZS · 01/03/2019 09:26

Accept the place for now, it does not harm any waiting list or appeal process. You can withdraw her later once the dust has settled.

PeachPotato · 01/03/2019 09:35

I don’t know what the admissions experts would say but I would accept the place and not mention you are happy to home school. For them, you home schooling solves the anxiety and trichotillomania issue so makes your appeal less compelling. And it seems unlikely anyone is desperate to get into the school if it’s as bad as you say.

MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 09:45

Hmm I hadn't considered it would come across as antagonistic. Unfortunately I've made my intention known to the council that I will home school rather than send her to the offered school but not done anything officially yet.

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MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 09:48

The woman at the admissions said turning down the place won't mean she is taken off the waiting lists for any of the other schools and she will remain on the list until 31st of December after which time she will need to apply as a mid year entrance.

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Myusernameismud · 01/03/2019 09:52

Accepting the place keeps you 'in the system' as it were.
If you're still not offered a place at your preferred school by September, you can withdraw and home school. But accept the place OP, I can't tell you how many times we were advised to do that by various different professionals when we weren't offered our preferred school last year.

MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 09:53

OK I will accept the place for now. Thanks everyone. It's my first time going through this so feel very out of my depth.

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MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 10:02

OK apparently it is an automatic acceptance in our area as refusals aren't allowed as there are no spaces at all.

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Penguinandbear · 01/03/2019 10:03

I would find out where you are on the lists. Waiting lists do move though obviously never any guarantees but our secondary list - outstanding school great results moved one place a week at 165 entry. DDs grammar waiting list moved at similar rate.

It's probably worth appealing as well - we didn't bother as appeal success rates were pretty much zero and no real grounds. I am not an appeals expert but there are people on MN who are - I wonder if you can get something from the doctors about her anxiety etc and impact on her would help your case. Good luck!

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 01/03/2019 10:04

Phew, glad to see you will accept the place. Not doing so means the KA have discharged their duty and can wash their hands of you with no obligation to offer you another place. So from now on, don’t mention homeschooling, focus on getting an appeal with whichever schools you would prefer. Don’t mention the ‘bad’ school, not wanting to go there is meaningless with regard to the process from this point on. The only thing that matters are the reasons why your preferred school is the best school for your DD. And as PP said, why not sending her would be worse for her than offering an extra place is for the school.

PanelChair · 01/03/2019 10:50

The issue about refusing the place isn’t that it will remove you from waiting lists - it shouldn’t - but at an appeal it can come across as an attempt to hold a gun to the panel’s head. The appeal succeeds or not on its own merits, but arguing that the child needs a place at the preferred school because the allocated place has been rejected carries no weight at all and may even alienate the panel, who you want to give you the benefit of any doubt.

MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 10:53

Thanks so much for the advice. I will gladly act on it! I'm also going to make an appointment at the offered school to have one more look and discuss my concerns. Keep all options open. I'm just so sad for her. She's had such a rough year and this is going to make her anxiety so much worse. I think I was a bit naiive going in to this process and really wish I'd done more research on previous offered catchment distances etc. Feel as though I've let her down.

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MayorMumbum · 01/03/2019 10:55

Naive* Maybe I shouldn't homeschool BlushGrin

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