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Original poster

If your child is at a playdate or sleepover

30 replies

Housewife2010 · 23/02/2019 17:38

Would you expect the host parent to return him/her or assume that you would do it yourself? My son's friend has come round for a rare sleepover. I invited him for 4pm. When she dropped him off his Mum asked what time she should collect him. When I said "11" she repeated it in a surprised way as though it was too early. She then asked if she was to collect or if I was returning him. When I told her that she could pick him up she joked that I was "lazy". I do feel a bit out out. I think 4 pm until 11 am is plenty of time. I would always assume that it was my job to collect my child from a visit. If the other parent offered to return him I would be grateful but never expect it.

OP posts:
user1493413286 · 23/02/2019 17:40

If you’re looking after someone else’s child the least they can do is drop them off and pick them up. Maybe she was hoping to have a few drinks and have recovery time (which is obviously not your problem)

kateclarke · 23/02/2019 17:41

She sounds like a CF.

That’s plenty of time and she should be thanking you.

girlsyearapart · 23/02/2019 17:41

11 for a sleepover is late imo! It’ll feel like tea time by then ...
She’s being a cf re drop off it’s up to the parent to retrieve the child unless otherwise offered

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reallybadidea · 23/02/2019 17:43

I bet she was planning a hangover. CF though Grin

MissMudskipper · 23/02/2019 17:44

Definite CF on your hands there. 4 until 11 the next day is more than enough time and yes she should be dropping off then collecting.

Perty01234 · 23/02/2019 17:45

Sounds like she has a night out planned and will be slightly hungover at 11am 🙈😂 she’s a CF.

Original poster
Housewife2010 · 23/02/2019 17:47

He goes to his Dad's on alternate weekends so she has plenty of opportunities for a hangover.

OP posts:
IncrediblySadToo · 23/02/2019 17:48

It usually ends up just being whatever is convenient with various activities, siblings commitments etc. unless something in particular is happening then I’m not bothered how late they stay.

However, in general I would expect the visiting child’s parent to drop and collect at whatever time I said.

She sounds like a CF. How did the sleep over come about? I wouldn’t be surprised to hear her DS is out at sleepovers most weekends.

AChickenCalledKorma · 23/02/2019 17:50

Sleepovers are done by 9:30am in this house. The morning is never as much fun as the night before and I want my house back by then.

Sometimes I do take them home, just because it allows me control of the end time.

Original poster
Housewife2010 · 23/02/2019 17:51

I invited him because my son really wanted me to. She is very nice but I've noticed her before on playdates asking which of us was bringing him home. - I always say that she can.

OP posts:
cstaff · 23/02/2019 17:55

She is a total piss taker. Just looking for a lie in tomorrow. Stuff that.

Gizlotsmum · 23/02/2019 17:59

Meh. My daughter had a sleepover last night her friend was dropped her at 3:30 and I dropped off at 2:30 today, it's normally one picks up the other drops off and it was convenient as was in town anyway. Really just goes with whatever works. Maybe she thought drop back would be earlier hence the lazy comment (not leaving till 11?

TheCanyon · 23/02/2019 18:08

She was super rude.

I dont think we've ever had a sleepover end earlier than lunchtime, but we're fairly good friends with our dd's friends parents so its all pretty casual. We pick up/they drop off equally, guess it depends on the other dc/parents plans as to what we do.

The only time i've ever asked if they could bring dd home was when i did my back in and couldnt physically manage to get the twins pram out the house.

LoopyLoonyLuna · 23/02/2019 18:21

Definite CF and so rude for calling you lazy!! I would have called her out on that!

I would expect to drop off and pick up my child from a sleepover and 11am is perfectly reasonable time. Given most kids are up late night of sleepover and rise early next day, that’s lots of childcare and kids are often exhausted the following day so usually I pick up by about 10.30/11.

Upsy1981 · 23/02/2019 19:07

11am seems fine to me! Enough is enough by then. Usually visiting child is picked up or we collect DD but sometimes if host family is on their way out somewhere they will offer to drop off on the way. Like a PP, I don't necessarily mind dropping off as I get to say when its home time!

daisypond · 23/02/2019 19:09

The child's parent should collect their child in general. And 11am is fine.

Wearywithteens · 23/02/2019 19:14

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

elQuintoConyo · 23/02/2019 19:18

About 10am, the child's parent collects.

formerbabe · 23/02/2019 19:18

Very rude. I would always assume I was to pick them up.

Fromage · 23/02/2019 19:19

She's not going to show up at 11pm , is she?!

Sounds like a chancer. How often does she host playdates, and is she in the habit of returning people's children back to them?

BusySittingDown · 23/02/2019 19:21

I expect to do pick ups and drop offs unless offered otherwise.

11 am is a perfect time - I would expect most adults to have been up a while by this time!

If we're having someone to sleepover I usually can't wait to get rid of them by 11am and if my children are the ones sleeping over I usually can't wait to get them back!

ShowOfHands · 23/02/2019 19:23

We do whatever suits. Sometimes we do the running around, sometimes other parents. Depends on plans, activities etc. DD stayed at a friend's this week and they returned her on the way to rugby practice.

Walnutwhipster · 23/02/2019 19:29

All depends. DD is on a sleepover tonight. I dropped her off and will be collecting at 2.30.pm. I cant bear the ones they go on where you have to collect in the morning. It hardly seems worth them going. I don't drink, so no hangover. This mum knows I'm connected to a piece of medical equipment for 15 hours a day, which means collecting before lunchtime is a nightmare so if she wants rid of DD early she'll be the one dropping her off.

Juanbablo · 23/02/2019 20:30

Dd has gone on a sleepover. I dropped her off at 1 and will pick up whenever the parents want me to tomorrow morning.

firawla · 23/02/2019 20:32

Around here the parent normally picks the kid up about 9 or 9.30am!! She’s a CF

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