Do you think this is odd, if you’ve arranged a group meet up with mum friends from toddler days, and one of them wants to bring someone else, who no one knows ?

[Lardlizard]

All these he mums life in different areas bit not far, and all the kids in the group go to different schools

But this person wants to invite, someone they’ve just met through their child at school, so they don’t really even know then much yet

If it is a small group, say three close friends, then I'd say it was slightly odd to want to introduce a newcomer.

But if it's a larger group, say five or seven, then not so strange, as larger groups do tend to alter, members drop out etc.

Also the new person seems to have children the same age as all of your children, so could fit in well, and they might need some new friends, so it could be a good step for them.

You are either a comfortable with people I know, or, more the merrier type of person. Don't think either types are odd, just different.

Perhaps the other person is going through a rough time / hasn't got mates and yours is trying to help?

I remember thinking it was weird a friend just ‘brought along’ someone she’d recently met to one of our post baby get togethers....the random is now one of my best mates 😁. Be kind, you may be rewarded!!

Yes a small group and I agree with a large group it would be different

No, I wouldn't think it was odd at all. I've met some good friends in similar situations. I'm not cliquey though.

No, I wouldn’t think it was odd

No, not odd

No, this has happened to me several times and I've met some lovely people as a result.

I wouldn't find it odd. That's how you make new friends as an adult.

If you meet up frequently then there's no harm in a new person coming along, but if it's a once in a blue moon catch up, it isn't cliquey to find a new person off putting. There's dynamics in a small group that are easily thrown off kilter, plus then you either need to make tedious small talk so the newcomer isn't left out of conversation or go over the back story of every single little thing. It kills the flow of conversation. Like "How's Jeff's scar?" Turns into "Well Jeff is Helen's older son, he split his head open at school but they didn't take him to hospital so when he finally got seen it was all infected and it needed to be cleaned and surgically stitched but the stitches got infected too and it wasn't healing well so.he had to see the specialist team and I was.wondering how it is now."

Not particularly odd, especially if the person is new to the area. I'd assume your friend thinks they are nice and is trying to introduce them to other nice people. It would make your group of friends the opposite of cliquey, which most people I think would see as a good thing.

Yes. I think it's odd. If there's a few of you who share experiences, PNG then you get together to share.

If it's just a group of school mums all going to a place/outdoor swimming pool, theme-park, then of course they can bring someone.

But why would they even want to? Aren't they already friends with your group.

Seems odd.
Surely they can meet this friend another time. Or cancel you, and say I can't meet anymore, because I'm meeting friend A.

I wouldn’t think it was off presumably she has children a similar age so will already have that in common. This is why people feel excluded and describe other mums as cliquey because they are. All our friends were strangers at one point.

I agree with previous posts. Maybe this new person doesn't have much of a friendship circle or support network. Be kind. I'd like to think people would invite me into a group if I was struggling - could be a lifeline for this person.

No not weird

Anyway sometimes these things can happen almost accidentally in friendly conversations

"Do you want to meet on such and such a date?"

"Ah, can't I'm going to such and such"

"Oh that sounds nice, I live near there" (or whatever)

"You should come along!"

You know, like unintentionally ended up inviting someone. I'm sure I've done that.

I like when friends bring new people. I'm always on the lookout for more friends 🤣but I'm a more the merrier type of person anyway.

No. It's hard to make friends who you can do 'mum things' with. Make her feel welcome.

I Was this person. Never got on with my baby group people, had no support from family, split from husband when baby was 10months old. My friend had a great group of supportive women, and invited me along. They are now my friends of 5 years and I couldn't have gotten through the last 5 without them. New doesn't have to be sniffed at.

I've got a close group of mum friends, one of them used to quite often invite other friends of hers with DCs the same age to our meetups, it was nice and meant that when we subsequently took the DCs to new swimming lessons or whatever there was often someone we'd met before to chat to.

She may have no other ‘mum’ friends and need the company. Be kind, don’t be the clique.

How are people meant to make friends if this type of situation is seen as odd?

It's not something I would do but I wouldn't find it odd if the person who invited the new person along mentioned it in advance and made an effort to include her friend in the group. I like meeting new people.

I have a small group of mum friends like this and once when we met up one of the mums turned up with a friend who none of us knew. The mum and her new friend then spent the whole time standing separate from the rest of us, only talking to each other, and I thought 'why didn't you just meet up with her with her for a coffee if you wanted a private chat?'. That was odd. And annoying when it had taken us ages to find a date and time when we were all free to meet up in the first place.

I wouldn’t have an issue with it personally. It’s nice to include people and she might be new to the area and be hoping you meet more people.

Maybe new person is new to the area/open with your friend that she feels lonely at the moment. Be kind! She could be your new BFF!