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Original poster

Can they cross their arms to avoid Ash Wednesday cross?

98 replies

Ohfuxx · 11/02/2019 17:24

Kids go to Catholic school but aren't Catholic.

They don't want ashes on their heads Ash Wednesday.

Can they cross their arms like when you don't want to receive communion?

OP posts:

PCohle · 12/02/2019 13:54

Saturday surely the law provides for kids to receive "an education", not "an education at the absolute best school in the area".

If she wants the best school she has to put up with the catholic teaching. She can have a non-denomination education at a school she perceives as less good. That's her choice.

CandyFlossLegend · 12/02/2019 14:23

Another one of these threads. Send your DC to a RC School and then spout ignorant remarks about RC practices. This is the second one I've seen this week. Have a

Chinks123 · 12/02/2019 14:30

I think it’s rude to send your children to a faith school and then describe their practices as “weird.” It’s not weird to them is it? Because they’re catholic. If it’s too weird for you and your kids send them to a non religious school!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Philosophy & religion

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2019 15:04

PCohle, the law provides that maintained schools and academies must allow parents to withdraw their children from religious observance. They don't get a pass that lets them ignore the law just because they're Catholic/Cof E/Baptist/Islamic/Jewish/Buddhist/Satan Worshippers or whatever.

So no, no-one has to put up with compulsory religious observance, best school or not.

Teaching, needless to say, is another matter. Children can of course be taught about all sorts of religions, and indeed they should be as part of a properly rounded education. However, they should not be taught that only one religion has validity.

DaffydownClock · 12/02/2019 15:08

Back in the 60's I went to a private convent school; the two thirds so-called 'Non Catholics' were fee paying, RCs went free. As a CoE I had to attend mass, Ash Wednesday mass and everything else religious, no excuses accepted.
The fact that I'm now agnostic isn't a coincidence.
In the first few years the mass was in Latin too, learned ad verbatim so goodness knows what I was chanting half the time!

PCohle · 12/02/2019 15:43

Yes of course OP can withdraw from RE and indeed collective acts of worship. But it seems she is complaining about the religious ethos of the school and is wholly dismissive of the catholic faith ("critical thinkers", "smart enough to take it with a pinch of salt", "weird"), yet is unwilling to actually have her kids opt out of mass because that would be embarrassing for them.

I'm afraid I have limited sympathy.

Toooldtocareanymore · 12/02/2019 15:57

No crossing arms doesn't work, however you generally only get ashes once, so send them 9o school with just a smudge on their forehead and tell them stay seated, head teacher wont climb over seats to get to them

icannotremember · 12/02/2019 16:17

Totally not the point of the thread (sorry) but why would children who aren't Catholic attend a Catholic school?
Maybe that's the only school that had a place for them. Maybe it's their local school. Maybe it's a good school. Maybe it meets their needs in every other way. Why the heck should any state funded school be off limits on religious grounds?

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2019 17:23

PCohle, I haven't seen OP complaining about the ethos of the school; she simply says she and her children don't subscribe to it. It's a free country, they don't have to. Nor has she said she is unwilling to have her children opt out of Mass; I suspect she doesn't necessarily know she has that option available to her, it's obviously not something that the school has publicised.

PCohle · 12/02/2019 17:35

I think choosing to send you kids to a religious school when not only do you not share that religion but are actively dismissive of it is bound to end badly.

Sure the OP can legally opt out of all the religious aspects of the school, but as the OP is finding out that can prove isolating within the school community, at an age and stage when kids are very keen to conform.

Standing on your strict legal rights doesn't always mean you've made a sensible decision.

shecamefromgreece · 12/02/2019 18:31

There seem to be a couple of threads about non catholics at catholic schools at the mo.
Op if you are going to send your kids to catholic school you can't really complain about them receiving the ashes and I really do think you are mailing a mountain out of a molehill.
As others have said it's not a sacrament.
I would love to know how they avoid all the religious teaching as it's pretty constant, do they leave the room? It must be quite disrupting for them.

Noteventhebestdrummer · 12/02/2019 18:34

Don't tell anyone but it's the ashes that make the GCSE results so good

evaperonspoodle · 12/02/2019 19:14

Why is everyone assuming the OP is in England? She might be in Northern/Ireland where there are loads of Catholic schools and catchment areas do not exist. My BIL is in NI, his dc go to a Catholic primary school (closest school) but they do not even partake in 'RE let alone Catholic rituals as they are not catholic. They have never had any issue with that, which as parents is their right to remove their dc from religious education.

On a side note do primary aged children get ashed or is it just secondary?

shecamefromgreece · 12/02/2019 19:15

Primary's school children get asked too.

shecamefromgreece · 12/02/2019 19:15

*primary school

Paradyning · 12/02/2019 19:46

Why is everyone assuming the OP is in England?
I'm sure she said she was in London that's why. (Happy to stand corrected)

UnderHerEye · 12/02/2019 21:11

It’s the spirit of the home-school contract that’s relevant - ie you sign it to say you understand and agree with the ethos of the school and agree to your child following the rules.

As a pp observed its perfectly legal to remove your child from religious observerence but is it in keeping with the spirit of the school?

And I would love to know why my post was deleted if anyone would like to shed some light ? Or is disagreeing with people not allowed anymore ?

SaturdayNext · 12/02/2019 22:47

There's no indication in OP's posts that this is in any way proving isolating. She has said there are other children in the school who are not Catholic.

ineedaholidaynow · 12/02/2019 23:01

I went to a Catholic convent for secondary school. It was a fee paying school. They were quite happy to take anyone's money. My parents sent me there because it was a good school. There were about 5 Catholics in my class, the majority of the others were CofE, and then there were a few like me who didn't go to church at all

We had a religious assembly every day in the school hall, which everyone had to attend. But if they had special services in the chapel, only those who were confirmed were allowed to go

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 12/02/2019 23:17

i don’t see how the spirit makes it any more relevant or any more legal.

The school has to follow the parent’s wishes whether the parent has signed a home school agreement saying they agree to uphold the ethos of the school or not.

AlexaAmbidextra · 13/02/2019 02:05

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

UnderHerEye · 13/02/2019 06:49

RafaIsTheKingOfClay

The ‘home-school agreement’ (or whatever varient the school has) is a bridge between the schools ethos and expectations and the parents of pupils, (no body stated it was a legal document??) the point of it is to enable the school to say ‘this is our expectations’, from what the OP says her attitude towards the school
is hypocritical- happy to have the great education the school provides, but sanctimonious about the school wide religious belief is a shitty way to behave.

(Still unsure why my previous post was deleted !)

SaturdayNext · 13/02/2019 08:14

Alexa, if a faith school takes large amounts of public money to open and run a school to promote its faith, but is prepared to take children of any faith, there's a degree of hypocrisy in not respecting their faiths - particularly if it isn't prepared to comply with the laws of the country providing that money.

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