A feminist man walks into a bar.....

[BertrandRussell]

Just shows how low the bar is, doesn’t it?

Feminist rant or jokes?

Not sure I can do rants, but here's a joke...

A white horse walks into a bar and asks for a drink.

Barman says "hey, we've got a whisky named after you" and the horse says "I didn't know you've got a drink called 'Eric"

Sorry if I've missed the point!

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman says "what is this, some sort of joke?"

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini. The barman asks 'olive or twist?'

Caecilius walks into a bar
“Martino,please”
“Don’t you mean a martini?”
“If I’d wanted a double I’d have asked for one”

Woman walks into a bar. She says ‘ow’. It was an iron bar.

Shakespeare walks into a bar and the barman says 'Oi! Beardy! Get out....you're Bard.'

Where does Kylie Minogue get her kebabs from?
Jason's Donner Van

A blowfly goes into a bar and asks: "Is that stool taken?"

A blonde goes into a bar and asks for a double entendre.
So the barman...gave her one.

I fucking LOVE that joke Babdoc

Descartes walks into a bar. "You having anything?", the bartender asks. "I think not", Descartes replies. Descartes vanishes.

The past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense.

It is very strange the effect that smoking has on people. Both my dad and fil were lovely, considerate, thoughtful men. But when it came to smoking they changed. Jekyll and Hide.

Oops, wrong thread.

Arial, Verdana and Helvetica walk into a bar. "Get out!" yells the bartender. "We don't serve your type here."

Lol Bertrand, I thought I just didn't get the joke.

two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other.
"moooh"
"gesh" says the other cow.. "That was what I was about to say."

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the barman.

A piece of string walks into a bar and walks up to the counter.

The bartender says, "Sorry mate, we don't serve pieces of string in here, get lost."

Upset, the piece of string walks out the door. A sudden thought strikes him. He ties himself in a knot and messes his hair up.

He walks back into the bar and approaches the counter. The bartender says, "Oi, aren't you that piece of string from before...?"

"No," says the piece of string, "I'm a frayed knot.

Dare I...

A dyslexic walks into a bra...

A man walks into a bar with a roll of Tarmac under his arm and says 'A pint for me please,and one for the road'.

A man walks into a bar. There's a dish of peanuts on the bar and while he's waiting for his drink they start talking to him.

"That's a nice tie."
"Your shirt really brings out the colour of your eyes."
"You're looking great tonight."

So when the barman brings his drink, he says, "Look, mate, these peanuts, they're... well, they're talking to me." And the barman says, "That's right, sir. They're complimentary nuts."

A polo mint walks into a bar and starts swaggering and posturing "I'm the hardest sweet there is! I'll take any one of you on!!"

A Tune then walks into the bar. The polo mint, scared, runs into the toilet and hides. The Tune orders a pint, downs it and leaves.

The polo mint comes sheepishly back into the bar. "Ere" says the barman "I thought you said you were hard!"

"I am" says the polo mint "but those Tunes are fucking menthol!" 😁

ThatLibraryMiss the guy then goes to the fag machine for some Marlboros, but as he gets there the machine says, "Oi, you ugly wanker! You're not gonna pull in here with a mug like that!"
When the guy complains to the barman, he's told, "yeah, that machine's out of order."