Need some advice regarding major supermarket

[sandymccraken]

For a bit of background I am a long term Mumsnet user who has changed their name for advice on a sensitive matter. I am seriously ill (terminal diagnosis) and am awaiting major surgery to extend my life.

Last week I went shopping on my own which I never do. I have carers, several friends etc who I would normally go with but I had gone in to collect something and decided to carry on. I made it halfway through but started to feel faint, I had chemo the day before and it's recently been upped and doubled. I am also type one diabetic and was struggling to function. To make matters worse the colostomy bag I wear had burst and I was starting to bleed down my front.

I made my way back to the pharmacy and was Given a sick bag. I chatted for a bit and dug my painkillers out of my trolley and tried to find a new bag. I was starting to panic. My trolley was full at this stage and I managed to push it to the front of the store. I tried to alert the guard (he was busy chatting/ flirting with the phone girl and the person on customer services) A young worker came over but walked off again and I was starting to get agitated. I made several calls but was not making sense and I was bleeding heavily and hallucinating...

This is the bit I know I made a mistake but I thought I saw my partner and went through the door in order to get a bag and more meds. It turns out a plain clothes man and 'flirty' guard had been observing me for 15 mins and guard grabbed my arm- I am heavily bruised. I came straight back in and asked to explain somewhere private. I had receipts for the first bits I had purchased. I told 4/5 guards and workers in a small room what had happened and that it could be verified. They let me test my blood but not change my bag. I was detained for over two hours and told the police would come (it turns out they were never called) and I was made to stand until they were concerned enough about my health to Let me go.

I complained to CEO's office in a factual way- exactly what had happened. They reassured me several times it would be looked into and were sympathetic but I went into store today to get medication but was screamed at by same guard and called a thief, repeated I was banned and an offender. Everyone looked at me. I had to ask for manager to be called who had already said I wasn't banned. He was raging at me and went nose to nose with my partner. It was humiliating.

What I don't understand was that I admit I shouldn't have left the store but I was just outside and I told them over and over I had evidence and their own pharmacy would have backed me up. I had no feeling by the time I got in and ended up in hospital the next day. CEO's office couldn't have been more 'team supermarket' and reiterated it was my fault. Why did the person following me just not speak to colleagues and get someone to ask if I was ok..?

Am I looking at this the wrong way? Is it my fault? Should I have done things differently? No one would Let me speak and I am due surgery imminently... I really feel low.

Any advice would be happily received even if you think I am at fault. I just need some clarity as it feels like I am going mad.

Also making you believe you were being detained under the pretence the police were being called is, by legal definition, false imprisonment. Have your solicitor add that to the summons.
Those saying ‘have you any idea how many times they have heard cancer as an excuse’ etc should be ignored, although said with good intentions. What happened to you is illegal; that is a matter of fact

I would be seeing a solicitor on the grounds they discriminated against you under the equality act and denied you life saving medication. Yes you fecked up, I accept that bit, however I too am diabetic and when I am in the middle of a crisis my thinking is not rational and can be confused and cloudy.At the very least they should have called an ambulance for you and the police too.How dare they treat you like that, it is not up to them to prove your guilt - they are not police or a court of law and have no rights to detain you like that without contacting the police, and you should have been treated with respect and dignity. Please please contact a solicitor without delay as you need to get this sorted xxxx

I can’t make sense of this. Did he assume you were a drug user based
on your behaviour and your trolley contents? I’m so sorry this happened to you OP.

With pps.

Ask this thread to be deleted, forget press etc.

Solicitor first thing in the morning. Look up a few you may not get the response you want from the first one but you’ll find one.

Camelia, did you miss the bit where OP said her colostomy bag burst and she had blood all over her?

There is no excuse for their behaviour.

@MostlyBoastly neither. He assumes I was shoplifting :(

OP, it's them not you

If you were treated so badly, why did you return to the same supermarket?

If you email the ceo make sure you copy in the press team for that company. Even if you don’t actually plan to go to the press it will light a bit of a fire under their arse

To uae the same pharmacy. Some of the medication. Is prescribed in London and then hard to get hold of. This store has 'extra' and can get hold of the impossible.

I do feel like I need a plan I

By a plan I need a different pharmacy!

Unfortunately the scourge of consisted think it’s their divine right to shoplift, and as many have said can present in many ways with every reason going
The store assistants are minimum wage and will have had little if any medical training,
I’m really sorry you had an awful experience but in terms of how they handled you- it was probably due to how you were presented
Could you get a medical bracelet so that you can point to that should you feel so unwell again? Most people will understand that means there is something more unusual about the way you’re presenting and likely to seek real help
Again sorry you’re so unwell x

That's a good idea. I have a steroid/ chemo card but it was tucked away in my person.
In all correspondence with the store and the company I have said I understand how it looked. I was literally half in and out of the sliding doors before he grabbed my arm hard enough to leave finger marks. I came In straight away,

I just asked go somewhere private to explain why I had done what I did.
i keep thinking over things.... I can't sleep. What if I am shouted at again.

Don't be losing sleep over this. Also don't stress yourself out going to a solicitor and adding extra pressure on.

It was a misunderstanding and the security guard acted in a terrible way. But it is what it is, if you can't find an alternative suitable pharmacy then surely he's not going to keep shouting at you. The manager cleared it up on your second visit that you weren't banned

No starbucks I didn't 'miss' that bit

but they will have had that trotted out to them many a time. I hear it myself where I work. People claim all sorts of tragic circumstances to get people on side,feeling sorry for them, as the reason for stealing

How often, CameliaCamelia, does that happen when they are demonstrably bleeding and have independent proof on them that they do indeed have terminal cancer? And, where you work, would you still treat as a "try on"?

You need to go directly to a solicitor, have them draw up a personal injuries summons including proceedings for defamation and have them served as soon as possible.

Littleheart, none of that is possible. You don't issue summonses in civil proceedings, and you have to go through pre-action protocols before firing off claims.

All I wanted was an apology and to feel they understood where they had gone wrong - to be listened to I suppose.

I understand in this day and age companies are super aware of what they say but they agreed with what I said happened and it's all provable bar the bit where I told them I was ill- I don't believe there was cctv footage from that room.

I was just surprised five days later it hasn't filtered through that the situation had been explained and resolved. It was very embarrassing to be screamed at and using words like 'theif' and ' offender' even his own colleagues told him to be quiet. I was also concerned they were happy to blame the freelance worker for bruising my arms when it was the zealous employee.

I could explain. I just wasn't given the chance. Regardless of whether someone would lie about having an illness I have documentation that a criminal would NOT be able to get and one phone call would have confirmed that.

OP, maybe this organization could help? www.equalityhumanrights.com/en/advice-and-guidance/disability-discrimination. The supermarket people behaved disgracefully.

**Saturday next

You do in fact issue a summons in civil proceedings- a Personal Injuries Summons. It is not the same as a summons to appear in a criminal matter.
And all I said before is entirely possible, as I have drafted same myself and tried the cases!!

You took a trolley full of unpaid goods to the front of the store & walked out through the door because you thought you’d seen your partner. Why didn’t you leave the trolley inside the store. You admit you shouldn’t have left the store.
Staff & Security wouldn’t have sympathy about your illness. Customers panic & tell lies when they are approached about stealing.
Try to put this behind you & never return to this store again.

I will.

Without being too identifying I have a very very visible illness. I 'look' every bit the illnesses/ treatments I have described.

If you took unpaid items outside then yes, it's theft but they should have been a lot more understandable once you explained. Illness isn't an excuse for breaking the law though so actually they are perfectly within their rights to pursue you however lacking in compassion it would be. Take care

Just to clarify
I repeatedly tried to get help or someone to leave it with as it had morphine and shapes in it. I was ignored.

I was hallucinating. Probably because of my blood sugars and Wooley headed from the chemo.

One of the First things I did was show them with my banking on the phone I regularly spend that amount and was willing to pay. I just needed a bag from the car.

I didn't argue or resist and am bruised.

To be honest I only wanted the chance to explain and even five days later after speaking to store manager I was tackled and shouted at. What if j had the kids with me?

I was at fault. I said that repeatedly. I am amazed though- they knew I had no history nor was known to the store- that they couldn't have at least checked with the pharmacy when I had been sick. Or that people exist that would have official paperwork to back what I had said and claim the level of illness.

I just wanted to explain.

What supermarket op?