Quick Poll re Toddler Sleep

[Art3mis]

I'm not a journo, just trying to make a point.

DS is 2.5. He is bf to sleep (I've recently dropped all night feeds but hopefully I'll be able to drop this one in the next month or so and have stopped completely), and then I/we go to to him between 1-4 times through the night for a hug/reassurance whatever.

How often do/did you go in to your toddler around this age? What did you to when you went to them? When did you stop going to them?

I think it's still reasonable that we're having to go see him, H does not.

[GinIsIn]

DS is 22mo. He’s sleeps from 8 to 7:30, but most nights wakes sometime between 3 & 4 and will need milk and cuddles to get him back down.

[TheCuddlyOctopus]

DD2 is 27 months and it varies- last night she went from 7.30 until 4.30 am with a brief wail at 1am (resettled herself). At 4.30 she came in bed for an on off feed and doze until 6. Sometimes (rarely) goes to 5.30 without a peep, sometimes awake 3 times and refuses to settle in her cot. Older sibling very reliably slept through from 22 months but they were both appalling sleepers as babies as well.

Both breastfed. We have tried to sleep train/nightwean Dd2 but she screams so much she wakes her sister and the neighbours and then everyone is awake. Last time we got to 10 days with no improvement. It is, slowly, getting better.

Having 2 awful sleepers is one of the main things that has put us off a 3rd- we can't cope with another 2-3 years of exhaustion. Careful observation of friends shows it is pretty much all luck.

[PleaseLetMummySleep]

Toddler is 16 months. Self soothes to sleep at 6.45pm, generally sleeps until 7.15am.

I'd say 5 nights a week we don't hear from him overnight, but 2 nights a week he does call out. We leave him for 5 mins and he is usually back asleep. If not asleep after 5 mins we go in and shush him and give him a pat.

[PleaseLetMummySleep]

Meant to say we stopped night feeds at 5 months, stopped the dreamfeed at 7.5 months, and from 13 months the bedtime milk feed has been downstairs from a cup.

[ForeverBubblegum]

DS is about the same age and will sleep through about 70% of the time, but on bad night can be up 2-3 times. Sometimes takes a long time to get him to sleep initially (bottle then hugs, usually about an hour) but if he wakes he will usually go back to sleep more easily.

When he wakes I get in his bed for a bit then sneak out once he's asleep, tend to keep another bottle handy but he dosen't usually need it to go back to sleep.

[MaverickSnoopy]

DD1 at 2.5yo didn't wake at all and slept 7-7. If she woke at all then yes we would go in.

DD2 is currently 2.5yo and mostly sleeps 7-7. Occasionally she'll take a while to go to sleep or wake up earlier but she'll just lie their chattering. She goes through phases of waking in the night because she wants tucking in or some such. It's usually a month of waking a couple of times a night and then nothing for a month.

We started bedtime routine at 6wo though and very rarely deviated from that. We sleep trained DD1 at 6 months but never did with DD2 because we didn't want her to wake DD1. I think it's much easier with 1 and sleep training is totally worth it if your sleep is being disturbed because it's much better if everyone is sleeping.

[BalloonDinosaur]

DS has just turned 2, he normally sleeps 7-7/8ish.

It's pretty rare that we have to go into him, sometimes he wakes up but will happily resettle himself, if not it's usually because he's dropped his teddy, so we go in, give it back and reassure etc and he'll go back off again.

We are very lucky!

[IsItCoffeeTimeYet]

OP are YOU happy with the current set up? If yes, what's the problem, if no, do something about it!
What other people do doesn't matter. Your set up wouldn't work for me so I'd be looking to change things, but may work for others.
If it's not working for your DH then you probably have to think about changing things, if he's concerned that it's not 'normal' then you can reassure him that there is no normal when it comes to children!

[IsItCoffeeTimeYet]

DD is just turned 2. She sleeps 7:30pm-8am and we never have to go in to her.

At 2.5 DS would've been sleeping 7-7, occasionally needing us to go in to him (nightmares/night terrors).

[BipBippadotta]

DS is 21 months. About once every 8 weeks he randomly sleeps through the night, but most nights he is up every 2-3 hours for about an hour each time, either with night terrors or wide awake wanting to play. He is up for the day anywhere between 4:30 and 5:30. He is in his own room in a cot & stopped breastfeeding of his own accord at 19 months. We have tried every sleep training method apart from extreme CIO. I am broken with tiredness. He, meanwhile, is the life and soul of his nursery and always has a great day and never seems overtired to his key worker. 🤷‍♀️

[Sanch1]

My 2.5 year old DD goes to bed at 7pm and gets up at 630am as I wake her for work, sometimes at weekend she will sleep till 8am. I probably put her dummy back in once a night, but its generally shortly after she's gone bed before she's into a deep sleep, if it falls out later she doesnt notice. Once a week she'll probably wake and not go back to sleep so comes in with me then goes to sleep but most nights I dont hear from her.

[Endofrelationship]

By 2.5 we'd just finished breastfeeding but he still needed hugs and 'hand boob' to get to sleep, took 30-60mins.

He'd wake 1-4 times, often needing to cosleep.

From my friends, there's a massive mix.

He's now 3 and sleeps through/ puts himself back to sleep 50% of the time and getting him to sleep takes 15-30 minutes.

[Endofrelationship]

Oh, and bedtime bis 7.30, up for the day around 6.

[Thecomfortador]

When ds was 2.5 I probably went in to him a couple of times in the night. He would feed before bed and I'd lie with him until he slept. He's 3 now and completely weaned, but I still sit with him until he's asleep. He sometimes has dreams or shouts / cries but still asleep. He always comes in to our bed in early hours and sleeps well next to us. Would be up around 7.30-8 if we don't have to be out of the door not long after 7.

[Art3mis]

Thanks for all the replies.

H thinks that he is waking too often and I shouldn't be going to him. I think it's been such a change for him in a relatively short period of time and am happy to still go in and reassure.

Last night was a bit better, only two wake ups, H did one (11pm) and I did the other (2am), DS slept until 630 this morning.

[MiniMaxi]

DS is about 2.3 (I’ve lost count!). Goes to sleep roughly 8pm, up around 6 (he has always wanted about 10h at night). Often up once in the night looking for his toys or wanting a hug. Sometimes comes in our bed at that point.

He didn’t become a “decent sleeper” until about 19 months so I’m ok with all that!

[HumpHumpWhale]

At 2 with DS, I stopped going to him, I told him if he wanted me to come to me, and we co-slept from his first waking, which was between 11 and 4, otherwise he'd not go back to sleep (but went straight back to sleep if I was there). Then shortly after that I moved to the spare room because I was 6 months pregnant, and DS slept with DH. He slept through from 3.5 but only after we bribed him to stay in his room for more and more nights in a row. He slept in total 7 to 6.
DD is 2.5 now and does blocks of up to a week of sleeping through, interspersed with blocks of waking once or twice. I go in, lie down with her, and she usually settles fast. She does approx 8 to 7 on a good night.
Both dropped their naps by 2.5. I stopped breastfeeding at 20 months in both cases.
If you feel ok then I'd keep doing what you're doing. I only changed things with my kids when I felt they were ready and/or I just didn't want to keep going. Although with DS we did try a couple of times before it took!

[Art3mis]

Hump we coslept in my bed until around September and then I spent 90% of my night in his bed until i stopped the noght feeds, so not something I want to get back into the habit of; it made things so much easier though, I definitely miss it when I'm sat trying to get him to go back down in the dark of the night.

[Camomila]

DS will be 3 in April. Goes to bed with us around 8.30, breastfeeds then has a few stories then snuggles down to sleep (brush his teeth in bed)

If I can be bothered I move him to his own bed.
Wakes around midnight, and shouts for me. Take him to bed with us, another quick bf and then he falls to sleep. Sometimes this happens another couple of times and I half wake up. Otherwise the sleeps for the rest of the night.

We are fine with it. Unless he's poorly he's slowly wanting less breastfeeds and just falls asleep with a hug or having his hair stroked.

I'm trying to gently wean him by 3. Will work on staying in his own bed after that, but don't see it as a big deal as both DH and I are from different cultures where cosleeping is more normal.

[Caterina99]

At 2.5 DS slept around 7-7. Unless ill, he probably woke in the night once a week or so to pee or for a dropped teddy etc. He would go back to sleep very quickly though.

[Redgreencoverplant]

DS will be 3 next month. Most nights he goes down and we don't hear from him until the morning. He does have short phases where that isn't the case though but they tend to only last a few days. If we do go to him he usually just needs a drink and a quick cuddle.

[snowone]

My daughter slept 7-7 from about 8 weeks, the only time we have had to go in is if she has been poorly.

[Orlande]

My that age my 3 were all sleeping 7-8pm to 6-7am. I wouldn't expect to go in to them unless ill/nightmares etc.
But, they all fell asleep independently so weren't waking every time they stirred in the night.

[chillydawg]

I have a 3yr old and a 20m old.
3yr old mostly sleeps through, might need a quick visit for reassurance now and then.

20m old is up a couple of times normally, normally just put the dummy in and he goes straight back off.

They both self settle but do have dummies.

[chillydawg]

Tbh my youngest (20m old) was so terrible at night for so long, twice seems like a breeze now!