If your children bickered a lot when they were small, are they friends now?

[morewaterplease]

My DD's are 5 and 2.5. They get along well at times and I can see they have a fondness of each other. However, they really do bicker a lot.

My youngest doesn't like people in her personal space and it all comes down to what mood she is in. So at times she'll laugh when my older DD tickles her or other times she'll get angry!

I'm on my own with them a lot so I also wonder if there's an element of my older daughter wanting my attention sometimes.

I'm just wondering, if you had children who bickered when they were small, has their relationship continued that way or have they become closer? It worries me to think that they could be like this forever now.

Really grateful for any replies.

I’d love to know too. Mine are 4 and 2.5 and it’s absolutely incessant and drives me to distraction daily.

Me and my sister hated each other right up until we were late teenagers. Now we get on well x

My brothers kids are similar ages and so close which is so lovely to see. I just worry that our girls won’t have that closeness 😔

Omg yes. Me and my sister (2 years between us) used to fight all the time. Best friends now, and call her most days

I don't have kids, but there's a 1.5 year age gap between me & my DBro & 4.5 between me & my DSis (I'm the oldest).

I more or less ignored or bickered with the pair of them as kids, but things improved a lot once I left for university. Now I get on fine with him & I'm very close to her - we even choose to go on holiday together.

Me and my brother were not left alone in a room together until we were both over 10, hated each other passionately until I left home, now I'm 33 and he's 29 and we actually like each other mostly (He's still a bit of a knob)

Me and my sister. 2 year age gap. We argued a lot! Over very trivial things, must have been so draining for my parents. Pushing and shoving to get to sit in the front seat. Name calling, stealing clothes as teenagers.

But we were always loyal and although I would argue with her I wouldn't let anyone else.

Now we see each other a few times a week, help out with childcare for each other and our children are more like siblings (and bicker too). Genuinely my best friend.

My brother and I have 3 years between us, he's older. When I turned 18 it was like a hatred wall had been lifted and now we are best friends. Almost. But we do get along swimmingly.

This is promising.... but does that mean the bickering won't stop until they're adults? That's quite a daunting thought!

20 months between me and my sister. We fought incessantly and really didn’t get on until we were adults and had our own children. Our parents were quite strict and I think this had something to do with it. We were both too focussed on winning praise from mum/dad and doing the other down.

No
They are early 20s

My brother and I drove my mum crazy bickering. There is just over 2.5 years between us and we are very alike in personality (different interests though). As teenagers we calmed down on the bickering although weren't exceptionally close. We get on well as adults. Not best buddies but do spend time together.

I remember thinking at that age that mine argued 50% of the time. ie. A lot!
They argue a lot less now at 11 and 14. They have similar interests. They were playing Roblox together today. They definitely benefit from having each other. Occasional fall outs but not too much.

DDs now 16 and 18. They started getting on really well in the last few years and are so close.
I felt exactly like the OP when they were younger, they would bicker and I thought they always would. It was mostly the older sister not liking her sibling much, tbh, younger DD was always trying to build that bond.
:)

My sister and I bickered constantly. Not close now but get on ok when we see each other.

DH and his sister also bickered constantly, worse than me and sister and still do!

PS. 2 years 8 months between them

Hated my sister growing up. Best friends now!

My 2 DC have finally started getting on in the last 2 years or so, DS is 18 & DD is 16, so there is hope! 😂

My brother and I have the same age gap and did not get on until we didn't have to live together.

My sister and I are pretty much NC. We hated each other as children. By that, I mean we rarely played together, we got into physical fights and so on. It was more than sibling bickering.

We see each other maybe once every few years and then it's polite but strained.

She's 2 years older.

My little bro is a year younger than me. As kids (under 10) we used to have literal fist fights, rolling around on the floor... I always fought dirty too shouting for my dad then crying (pretty ashamed about that!)

Stopped completely as teenagers and we talked about it a few years ago and I apologised for getting him in trouble so much.

Love him to bits and would be there for him in a heartbeat, confident he feels the same

Mine were absolutely awful - the worst was when DS was 10-12 and DD 6-8, they bickered constantly, nothing was ever fair, DS was always calling DD stupid, fat etc etc.

Car journeys were a nightmare when they were both in the back seat - it improved once DS was old enough to sit in the front, but there were times when I did an emergency stop (after checking my mirrors..) to shock them out of it because the bickering was so distracting.

They are now 20 and 16 and get on absolutely fine, including travelling long distances by train together without me and staying in touch by instagram etc when DS is off at uni.

We did fight until we were adults but parents didn't have to get involved often once we were a bit older. And there were lots of good times too.

I am in my 30s and HATED my siblings as a child. 5 years between my brother and 9 years between me and my sister.

I am really close to my brother now, he looks up to me and asks for advice.I appreciate him for being an honest caring person, and he didn’t fixes my car when it’s broken.

My sister, we have our moments. She is extremely stubborn, entitled late 90s child. She has switched her degree/Job more than I know. But has paid for her own driving lessons (that’s what my parents said) and has visited her nephew once since passing her test

In short, pressie they will get on perhaps they wont. Xx

Oh I had sort of hoped that in a couple of years there may be a turning point, when my youngest learns how to play together properly (without messing up the game), but seems as though the wait might be a lot longer than I anticipated.

For now make sure you give enough attention to them individually and remember that, for a few years yet, the 2.5 year age gap means a huge difference in things they enjoy and their maturity. Don't lump them together.