Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

It's that stressful time of the year again..do you or don't you?!

110 replies

BooseysMom · 17/12/2018 19:07

Xmas presents for school teachers, etc. DS is in Reception and i have bought small choc presents for his teacher and TA but also got the lunch time supervisors a box of chocs as they have a difficult job and are under appreciated. But then what about all the other staff..the care taker and secretary for e.g..where do you draw the line esp when on a budget?
So what do you do? Do you buy or not buy and for whom?
Thanks ..and happy Xmas all Grin

OP posts:
RickOShay · 17/12/2018 21:23

I don’t buy anything Grin

BitchQueen90 · 17/12/2018 21:27

I don't buy Christmas presents for DS's teachers. I've got enough to pay for around this time of year and I can't afford it. They get something at the end of the year and that's it. I get DS to write them Christmas cards though.

gamerwidow · 18/12/2018 06:24

Buying Christmas presents is hardly a new thing though. Was at primary school in the early 80s and we did it then. Still each to their own.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

BooseysMom · 18/12/2018 06:38

I still think I should get the care taker something..he stands outside on the gate every morning in all weather ..but then so do all the others. But no I have to draw the line. We can't afford it Hmm

OP posts:
Mulberry72 · 18/12/2018 08:02

DS is now in Y7 and we only ever bought for a teacher on one occasion at his request as she was brilliant with him when he was struggling.

We have teachers in the family (Primary and Senior and two HOY) who’ve always told us not to waste our money as teachers get bought that much uneccesary stuff.

Alakazam7 · 18/12/2018 09:52

My dd has made little sewn Christmas stockings which we have then filled with assorted (bought) chocolates. It’s all her work and not just another box of chocolates. I felt this was more personal and wanted her to do something towards it. It did take time though but wasn’t expensive just 1 box of chocolates plus the fabric.

nottakingthisanymore · 18/12/2018 10:26

Christmas card with personal message of thanks and appreciation is fine. If you really wanted to you could send a box of chocolates for the staff room.

littlesos · 18/12/2018 10:35

I've never bought presents, a card is enough. What do you think happens to the all the mugs/pencils/handmade stuff, I can't imagine that teachers keep it all.

PrivateDoor · 18/12/2018 10:40

I have got fancy teas and coffees, biscuits and soft drinks for the staffroom at dd2 school, she has recently moved school and they have been absolutely amazing with her! Her teacher and TA are getting a wee xmas tin with homemade goodies in and a voucher. I have got nothing for DS school as his teacher is awful this year. DD1 is in high school and usually brings in a wee thing for her fave teachers, just 2 or 3 usually. I like to show my appreciation to staff who go over and above (which most do), if they don't then I usually don't bother giving a gift to be honest, just like I don't leave a tip if I have crap service.

PrivateDoor · 18/12/2018 10:42

OP if you can't afford it then of course you don't do it! No ONE would want you spending money you can not afford on them!

SundayGirls · 18/12/2018 11:02

I think like a PP has said, a card is fine especially with a few nice words in if the teacher/TA has been particularly nice or helpful but a small Christmas gift is a nice touch if you want to and can afford it.

I only do teachers and TA's though and usually get something like the Lindt chocolate reindeers when on a 3 for 2 offer. Just something small and Christmassy that can be consumed.

Evergreentree · 18/12/2018 12:22

I’ve been waiting for that special teacher, the one who inspired my dcs who went that extra mile for them. That way I thought the gift giving had meaning rather than just to give every teacher one. After 4 dcs I have never given a gift. They are inundated with presents. I volunteer in school and I end up with lots of the gifts as they just get too much.

Knittink · 18/12/2018 12:29

We don't do presents for teachers except end of year in primary if dc are moving into a different class (only happens every few years here, as small, mixed-year-group village school). I'm a teacher myself. We don't expect presents!

Delatron · 18/12/2018 12:33

I don’t buy anything and it’s very liberating. I doubt the teachers want 30 presents?

I wait until the end of the year and buy a voucher to the local bookshop to say thank you for the year of teaching.

ru345 · 18/12/2018 12:40

I regard my boys school as family as they are fab with him as he has autism. He has been their since he was 7 and will leave at 18. I spend a lot to show my appreciation.
Biscuits and tin chocs for school then individual gifts for
2 Head ALNs toiletry sets
2 LSA’s main one had chocs biscuits wine and toiletries for both
After school teacher wine
Piano teacher wine
Form tutor wine

We don’t have anyone other family in our lives except grandma so they are literally nearest thing to family for him.

gambleberry · 18/12/2018 12:48

i don't buy presents. if my kids really want to give them a present, then i suggest they draw a picture or write a poem.
i think it's ridiculous the pressure that some people feel - if you want to buy then fine, but if you're doing so because you feel its a social norm then just don't. it's one less thing to think about! :)

Lisbon · 18/12/2018 13:11

DC started school this year and I bought presents for:

Front Office/Admin ladies (x5)
Kitchen Staff (x2)
Teachers (x3)
ASN 1-2-1 Support (X3)
Management Staff (X3)

I got Crabtreet & Evelyn Christmas crackers for some, White Company Candles for others and Wine for another set.

The teachers and ASN got a White Company cashmere sock+candle set.

Now... DD has ASD and is non-verbal. She's the only child in those circumstances at that particular school.

The sheer work, thoughtfulness, out of hours volunteer training by staff, constant solution seeking, kindness and support are priceless to our family. They've done so much for our little girl that I don;'t grudge a simple penny; in fact I wish I could do more.

Obviously, if you can't afford to (or don't think it's appropriate) you shouldn't feel obliged to.

Lisbon · 18/12/2018 13:15

The kitchen staff dance with DD every morning when she comes in for her lunch card.

The admin ladies print Minnie Mouse colouring and picture by numbers sheets for her every single day. They all bought Disney lanyards to make her happy and have learned rudimentary sign language.

The Head Teacher takes her to her office and fixes her braids when they're messed up after PE, because DD gets sad about it.

Her ASN comes up with crazy materials to help teach the curriculum and DD is actually on track.

After years of stressing about Primary School, to see DD smile every time she puts her uniform on...
Any gifts are inadequate. I could kiss all those people, frankly.

tigercub50 · 18/12/2018 13:18

I bought for the office staff one year & never got a thank you. Usually I just do the teacher & TA but this year I also got a little gift for DD’s speech & language teacher & her counsellor who is now still her mentor.

sophisticatedsarcasm · 18/12/2018 14:23

My DS has asd and needs a lot of support at school. I’ve given boxes of biscuits each to his personal TA as she’s helped him through many a hard times, his SENCO teacher who is his fave teacher in the whole school, she is also leaving in January. I also got one for his teacher.
DD has 2 teachers, so 2 boxes of biscuits, one of hers is leaving too.

AhhhhThatsBass · 18/12/2018 14:36

We clubbed together with the class (22 children) and got a voucher £250 for class teacher and £150 for TA. Also separately getting a bottle of champagne for the head, money in a card for the caretaker and box of heroes for the office staff. I hadn’t thought of the lunchtime supervisor, had better get to the shops! 😳

Xenadog · 18/12/2018 14:51

As a teacher I can say a card with a nice personal message is all I really want. Biscuits or chocolates for the staffroom is nice but anything else isn’t really necessary.

Parents shouldn’t be worrying about buying teachers and other school staff presents.

April2020mom · 18/12/2018 15:01

Personally I think that boxes of chocolates are enough. My students give me boxes of chocolates and books each Christmas time. That’s all I want.

yumscrumfatbum · 18/12/2018 16:39

We buy a gift if my child wants to. A token item, only spend a few pounds. I like my child to choose it so not keen on contributing to a voucher

starcrossedseahorse · 18/12/2018 16:43

Usually anything homemade gets gratefully received and then quietly binned. Sorry!