How do you manage stranger danger vs asking for help if your child DID get lost?

[BiscuitofChoice]

Bit freaked out- was picking DD up from choir and it was busier than normal because they do an open dress rehearsal.

As we were leaving the school, a wee one had obviously got separated from his Mum and was wandering right out

Obviously I stopped and took him back in, but I could have been anyone and the wee soul was so trusting.

It's never been something I've thought about with mine, because tbh I've always just hammered home 'DO NOT GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT ME' but accidents happen plus my DC are getting a bit older now and I'd like them to go to the shop etc.

My dad used to always tell me to sit in a train carriage with a woman or ask a mum with children, which obviously isn't great advice really!

I also made him carry a piece of paper with my phone number on it.

I never taught stranger danger as children are most likely to be hurt by somebody they know - often a member of the family, but also other trusted adults (eg the Soham murders where the girls were killed by their school caretaker or April Jones who was murdered by her friend's dad).

My main rule for my dd was never to go anywhere with an adult, even an adult she knew, without asking the grown up who was looking after her. When she was old enough to start popping to the local shop or the park down the road on her own the rule became that she wasn't allowed to go with an adult without coming home to check first. We went through lots of scenarios eg "What if it was x (adult we both knew and trusted) and they said I'd asked them to collect you because of Y (insert plausible reason)."

I knew that the rule had sunk in when she was in Year 6 and had continued to wait at her bus stop in the rain rather than accept a lift off a very lovely and completely trustworthy female member of staff at her school.

I've lost count of the number of times that I've lost dd when she was younger. Never outside when she would stay close, but in numerous shops and museums. I always felt complete panic until I found her, but as she knew not to leave the building/room and to find a member of staff it always turned out ok.