How would you do long drive with baby + 10yo?

[BertieBotts]

We're planning to drive back to the UK for Christmas but it's a long journey (10 hours not counting stops). It's about 6.5h before the ferry and then 3 hours the other side. Can't share driving as only DH has a driving licence.

We've only done the drive once before and that was an emergency so no time to plan/think straight. We stayed over on the way in the world's tiniest hotel room and got no sleep, though that may have been more the situation, did it in one go on the way back but was knackering. Plus 3-4 hour stretches, which is too long for the baby.

Obviously we need to stop every 2 hours minimum to take the baby (4 months) out of the car seat, so what would you do?

A: Break the journey into two days, get cheap travelodge type room near ferry port.
Pros: Easier on DH, baby not stuck in car seat all day, DS1 less likely to get car sick.
Cons: Expensive, makes journey drag, essentially lose a day with family, baby stuck in car seat for most of 2 days rather than one.

B: Leave early morning and drive most of the day arriving at roughly dinnertime/evening depending on timing.
Pros: Mirrors the usual timing when we fly, jpurmey probably more interesting.
Cons: DH likely to be knackered when we arrive, potential traffic jams.

C: Drive overnight and arrive late morning.
Pros: Little traffic, baby will probably sleep.
Cons: How does a 10yo sleep safely in the car?? Is the baby going to be grumpy at being woken for a break from the car seat when he's expecting to be asleep? Will we find places open to get food/coffee/etc?

Any ideas/advice/experiences? And what DO you do for a 10yo sleeping in the car? Is it just a case of let them lie down on the back seat and don't worry about the fact he's not really in the seatbelt? He's too tall for a high backed booster, he still sits on a backless one.

Never mind I've just worked out the all day one even if we leave at 5am it will still be evening when we get there, not dinnertime.

Will come back when I know better time estimate for overnight...

With a baby that age, I'd probably split it with an overnight stop. Simply because stopping every two hours is really going to slow you down. So, three lots of two hours, then an overnight? If you're going via Calais, there are a couple of Novotel type hotels just befythe tunnel with good size family rooms.

(My 11 year old just slept overnight in his normal car seat with year without any problem. He had his duvet, and was fine.)

The 10 year old just sleeps sitting up. They absolutely need to be properly in the seatbelt.

Have you booked the Ferry already? If you can afford it, book the channel tunnel you can arrive 2 hours early or up to 24 hours late.
Otherwise, book a hotel room at Calais. Early ferry, breakfast on board. Arrive at destination at lunchtime.
UK France return trip stop off in hotel room on the way back.
I think it will be harder on the 10yo than the baby. You definitely need to get both out of the car every 2 hours; unless it is a night drive.

Travel over night if you can. 10 year old in seat belt with pillow for neck.
Can you get a lie flat cot thing for baby that works with seat belt?

Drive. Let Dh sleep on ferry, get kids up, walk around, sleep on other side
.

I don't trust those car carrycots, and I don't want to spend out loads of money on a lie flat car seat like the Kiddy one when we'll probably do this trip once a year or less. But even if it's a night drive I'd want the baby out every 2 hours so I'm thinking that will disturb his sleep anyway.

When we travelled back last time DS1 was so exhausted he just flopped over and slept lying down in the back. I was really anxious about it but it was late and there wasn't a lot of traffic, and I couldn't bring myself to wake him up as we'd all had such a stressful experience and just wanted to get home. But I want to be prepared for the possibility now. We also did it in a tiny car last time but we're hiring a bigger one this time (we have checked crossing the border is OK.)

We haven't booked anything yet as waiting on DS2's passport. It might not even happen yet! Just in planning mode.

We are thinking ferry is better than train as you get a break from being in the car, even though the tunnel is quicker. Though with the preboarding wait on the ferry it does take ages. With the tunnel can you just drive up and get straight on? If so that could potentially save 2-3 hours, which might be worth it.

You still have to wait before boarding. Can be a scrum depending on how busy it is. The advantage is you drive straight off, as all of the checks are done before boarding.

Crossing early morning will be quieter, in my experience.

But you don't have to wait around for 45 minutes in a queue I'm guessing? Hmmm will have a look.

I would fly. Sorry,not helpful.
It's a hell of a drive for the driver.

Personally I'd do 2.5hours, break. 2 hours, overnight break. Drive 2 hours to ferry then break on ferry and then do the last leg in one shot, unless there's traffic taking it over 2.5/ 3 or you need the loo. Unless baby was premature a 4 month should be totally fine like that,case long as the breaks are 45minutes or longer.

Too difficult with luggage to fly. That's what we've always done pre baby, but DH would rather drive. I was hoping to have my driving licence by now, so I could have helped out.

Definitely channel tunnel. I have done that crossing lots of times.
By the time you get to Calais, you just want to get across.
I’ve waited for the ferry and was losing the will to live after a 10 hour drive across France.
I would howewever in your case, leave mid morning, stop after 2 hours for lunch, 2 hours for tea (goûter); stop at Calais for dinner & hotel.
Next morning get an 8 am crossing. Currently 120 euros, you arrive in the uk at 7.30 am, you can have one stop in services en route and you’ll be at your destination by late morning and your DH will have had a good nights sleep.
Also portable DVD player or videos downloaded onto iPad with head phones for DS aged 10.

We used to travel back to uk frequently when I was a kid. I remember sometimes we were put in the car with our pyjamas on and took our duvet. Other times we used to get the overnight ferry to hull to break it up.
It's s long time to have your baby in the seat. Could you perhaps use on of those luggage courier companies who collect from your house to drop off at your destination and then get a flight instead? X

Again, not helpful, but I would fly. Pay the extra luggage fees and hire a car at the UK airport. If you are hiring a car in Framce, paying for a hotel, fuel & ferries anyway.

I'd do it in one hit, with stops every 2 hours to stretch legs/get food etc. But I am Australian, so accustomed to traveling distances from a young age - it is over 10 hours drive between every city here.

Personally I’d leave so you can sleep close to the ferry/train and get the earliest morning crossing. That way everyone is reasonably rested when you arrive at the destination. 14-16 hours of travel time is knackering. The most is do as a solo driver is 13 hours but that’s without the longer stops with children

I know it's an expense if you already have a seat but we have a cybex cloud car seat. It's brilliant as it's like a normal seat in the car but can lay down when you take it out of the car. We frequently bring DD in from the car asleep in it and lay her down to avoid waking her. It attaches to the pram on maxi Cosi adapters and can lay it down on the pram chassis too. I often don't take the carrycot out with us because of the lie flat ability. You'd still have to stop as you can't lay it down in the car but would avoid waking the baby which might make for an easier journey.

Its not a terrible Journey as like you say its around 6.5hrs and then ou have to stop anyway due to the crossing.

I would do it all in one day. Leave at 6am so everyone has a decent sleep beforehand (go to bed early). Then drive 2hrs, stop 30mins, drive 2hrs, stop 30mins, drive 2hrs and you should have arrived at port ( do 2hrs, 10mins or whatver each time so only 2 stops needed). so 6am-12.30pm drive. allow 2hrs for stops (incase longer is needed, but plan just the 30mins x2. arrive 1.30-2.30pm at port). book onto 4pm tunnel, allows plenty of time, you can often get on earlier tunnel if you ask.

Take the tunnel. its far quicker, even with check in and boarding which you have to do regardless of ferry or tunnel. The check in, boarding and 30min journey will take around 2hrs in total. Baby will only need to be in car seat for around 15mins of that.As most in in airport style departure lounge where you can walk around.

4pm tunnel, will get you back on the road before 5pm. 3hr drive with one short stop will get you there by 8.30pm latest. If you get to tunnel early and get on earlier train then potentially 1hr-90mins earlier arrival.

Your 10 year old can sit in the front seat now. That way you can sit in the back seat and can watch baby to check of any signs you might want to stop again, and you can play with to keep occupied a bit. Or you sit in middle with child each side if you prefer.

Car seat length of time if based on oxygen levels. Its actually only be tested on prem and newborn babies leaving hospital. Hence newborn times in car seat should be limited. At 4 months this isnt the case, a 4 month old can hold and support their own head far better. With you sitting next to them you can be reassured you can respond as needed.

The main problem with car seat use was that many were using day in day out on pushchair frame for hours at a time, repeatedly for months on end. That isnt good for spine, development or oxygen levels. For one day trip, twice. maybe twice per year, its perfectly fine with parents who will be monitoring, giving breaks and allowing baby to stretch out.

one tip is to take a padded changing mat with you. Then you can use on the back seat for them to wriggle and stretch during tunnel crossing, at stop stations and at security at port inside on floor or across a few chairs.

We live around a 16hr drive from calais - then 5hrs to family. Having done a few trips in past, we always fly now as that really is a long 2 day trip. If flying is an option, i would look at that, there cant be that much luggage, as to fit the same amount in the car would be a squeeze. pram and car seat for baby ( use pram as travel cot if possible), then just a case or two between you all.

Oh i forgot the time difference. at 4pm train, will actually get you into folkstone and on the road before 4pm uk time as journey is only 30mins, and takes about 10mins to get off.

We stop overnight or, more often if we go to the uk, get an overnight ferry. Depending on where you are coming from/going to you can do the Caen Portsmouth crossing or the Zeebruge (sp?) Hull crossing.

Personally I would be getting an overnight ferry and booking a cabin. This would allow a good quality break for your husband with the opportunity to sleep and be sold as a cruise to the 10 yr old😉

I think I'd do it in one hit having an early dinner on the boat. There's a good chance the baby will sleep the last leg on the UK side. Unless the night in Calais will add to your enjoyment of the holiday , it wouldn't mind I can't stand Calais

We’ve driven Yorkshire to southern France with a then 4 month old and a then 12 year old.
Uk took the longest amount of time (not sure where you are going) we went tunnel as it knocked hours off the journey.
eldest in the front, husband or myself in the back to keep an eye on little one.
Lots of stops... but he slept a dream.
We did it in one full journey, it was knackering and now we stop over after about 700miles.

Can you book a longer ferry ride? I know it takes longer than driving but it could give the driver a break, especially if you book a cabin, driver goes to rest, you take the kids to any entertainment for an hour or two.

I've spent a lot of time as one of the children in the car. My mum only learned to drive later in life so as kids dad was the only driver. Mum also would not fly and did not like ferries that much so we always went Dover-Calais. We used to do Yorkshire to Cornwall in the 70s and then later southern France, Italy, Spain.

OK when we went to Cornwall we travelled in PJs and lay down on the back seat with suitcases in the foot well to make a bed - obviously not recommended.

Personally I'd plan the journey around the breaks for both baby and driver. Makes the breaks coincide with busy traffic so maybe set off early morning say 5.30.

If you are near a city or on a motorway traffic will start to build up for commuters about 2 hours after this. Plan a stop and plan for it to be 1-2 hours. It is tempting to keep going but it is better to be in a service station thanin a traffic jam.

9.30 back on the road rested and breakfasted. 11.30 short break, 20 - 30 mins drive until 2 pm stop for lunch. Have a proper lunch, go to a restaurant or have a picnic with you back on the road until 5 then either another long break then the ferry or a short break and then book into somewhere for the night.

Take some time to relax, have a meal, depending on the port go for a walk, read a newspaper/book have a proper rest.

Early morning ferry and home for lunch.