I've been attacked by a sheep

[derxa]

We brought our rams and ewes to check which ones had been tupped.
I opened a gate to move some round the pens and our newest ram took a run at me and butted me in the thigh. I guess I got too close to his girls. I had just been praising him for his prowess. The cheeky bugger.
I've got a massive bruise.

How do you check them!?

Now I've herd it all

Oh for flock's sake, it's not a herd.

We are putting the rams in tomorrow - poor buggers are in the shed at the moment with the girls in the field behind and they are being driven mad!  just been in to fill their hay rack and they are not happy bunnys!!

It's a little known fact that sheep are bloody dangerous! The only broken bones I've ever had were caused by sheep (3 broken ribs) and that's after a lifetime working with horses and cattle as well!

Mind the bruising can be spectacular 😂 hope you are ok op x

I had a ram butt me on the side of my knee. I was off that leg for 6 weeks. Be careful. Don't underestimate rams.

Didn't realise there'd be ram ifications, elephant, do apologise

But sheep look so friendly

*The ram wears a harness with a coloured block underneath so if the ewe has a coloured bum then we know the ram has had carnal relations.
They start with yellow and then change to orange so if yellow bums change to orange there may be a problem. The ewes get scanned like humans.

That answer was to Rowen

My exhusband could have done with the same it would have saved me a lot of wasted time.

Why is it a problem?

I wholeheartedly appreciate every one of your puns.

As a child I was repeatedly attacked by an evil ram. He was very clever and only charged at people he knew were small enough to properly knock over! He was observant too so trying to sneak past him never worked either.

I bumped into a policeman one day who'd had to move a sheep off the main road. He told me he usually worked in the city, he was having a really bad day and he'd never realised that sheep could be so strong.

My exhusband could have done with the same it would have saved me a lot of wasted time. Well if human males wore a tupping harness at all times it might cut down on a lot of confusion and misery.

Fluffy, it can be a problem as mean the ram is shooting blanks or somethings up that means they're not getting knocked up, if lots are getting the lighter and the next colour.

Are you early?
When do you lamb?

Dontfeellikeaskeleton I wonder what the collective noun is for 'skeletons' is? Could it be a cupboard?
Derxa I hope you aren't bruised too badly. I have been semi-tossed by a billy goat and chased by geese. Neither of which were bracing outdoor into the countryside experiences.

No need to lambast everyone that made a bad joke though

Oh I see.

MrsRobinson excellent pun

Are you early? When do you lamb? We had a bit of a shit time at the sales so took our gimmers home. The plan is to sell them in lamb or lamb at foot. We lambed mid March last year but we may be earlier next year.

One of my favourite memories of my dad was coming out of a farm shop to see where he was. He was in the car park wielding tree branches. On closer inspection there was a ram on the other end of the branches munching happily. Apparently he was a much loved retired animal that was allowed to wander. When he found someone tall enough to reach tree branches he butted them in the right direction. The farm lad said 1 would have done but my darling dad said that when he retired he wanted someone to help him out. City slicker that he was I think he felt like a shepherd or something.

Ahh!
I don’t claim to know anything about the world of sheep but OH used to put his out on the 7th of Nov.

TheDodgyDunny nice work!

Everyone had a shit time with the gimmers this year, don't take it personally.

It must be a bad week for it. We had a large swale tup jump straight through a house window a couple of days ago. Glass everywhere. Tup was fine.