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Original poster

Breastfeeding Hell

48 replies

HeyDuggee24 · 01/11/2018 22:09

Coming up to 48hrs with DS2 and just settling in for a night of no sleep and pain.

I cannot for the life of me get the latch right. My nipples feel like razors when air simply brushes against them. DS is happy however he is latched but trying to get him on properly frustrates him. He will also only sleep straight from a feed on either me or DH.

I just need to make it through the night and then can get the feeding ladies out again tomorrow. I'm on first shift while DH sleeps.

Anyone else struggling? I don't understand why something so natural is so hard Confused

OP posts:
Nothisispatrick · 01/11/2018 22:11

It is so hard, i never expected it to be as it is so natural!

I’m 4 weeks in and we’re settled on mixed feeding now. DD is still never full after a breastfeed so I top up with a bottle, I don’t think I’d have survived otherwise.

ItsAndTarts · 01/11/2018 22:12

Has he been checked for a tongue tie?
Have you tried lying on your side feeding? I found it so much easier that way

IncomingCannonFire · 01/11/2018 22:17

Despite what some may say breastfeeding can hurt for a few weeks at first.
Also has baby been checked for tongue tie?
I found my twos mouths were too small to fit "properly" until they were a bit bigger and more experienced.
It does get much easier.

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Breast & bottle feeding Families
Longdistance · 01/11/2018 22:21

Get some Lansinoh to heal the nips.

Get ds checked for tongue tie.

The next few days will be constant as your proper milk will come in.

Try the rugby hold if you’re rather ample in the boobage department.

Flowers
Original poster
HeyDuggee24 · 01/11/2018 22:21

Congratulations patrick! Hope your enjoying your new DD.

I'm trying not to succome to topping up yet as I kno my milk isnt in yet. Feel like I need to make it to 72hrs first and can make a decision.

Def no tongue tie tarts! Checked by two midwives and the breastfeeding lady. Plus, you can really tell he opens his mouth super wide. He's perfect. Its me, my stupid big boobs and my nervousness with manoeuvring my own baby. When I try to feed in any postion but the traditional forward facing I feel like I'm gonna smoother the poor thing!

OP posts:
SylvesterTheCat · 01/11/2018 22:24

Oh OP I can completely sympathise. When I was at your stage after DC was born I used to dread feeding, particularly from my left breast. Felt like a serrated knife. It WILL get better! The skin kind of becomes more supple and smooth and elastic. One of my midwives said it's a bit like asking a foot with babysmooth skin to walk on a rough pavement, of course it will be painful/uncomfortable at first.
Lansinoh cream was a saviour. Lather it on. I remember arranging an Amazon subscription thinking I would need to keep buying it but tbh I didn't even get through my first bottle even though I was using lots of it- it felt better before I was able to get through it. Get as much help from professionals as you can. Take hot showers to keep milk ducts flowing (and to avoid things like mastitis) and please, please drink lots of water.
Now DC is five months old. Hang in there if breastfeeding is what you want to do 

ForeverBubblegum · 01/11/2018 22:26

It is super hard to start with but every day you make it through is a step towards it getting easyer. For me putting a pillow on my lap and laying DS on top made the difference, as he had been gradually slipping down and loosening the latch.

You milk probably hasn't come in fully yet, when it dose that's a game changer. At the minute baby is feeding extra to build up supply but that should carm down in a day or two.

Congratulations on your lovely baby, and for making it this far. Your doing brilliantly.

Cakestop · 01/11/2018 22:26

Possibly too soon but keep in mind you can get ductal thrush. That can be horrifyingly painful and you can think it’s the latch etc etc. Good luck :)

SmokeAndBone · 01/11/2018 22:27

I had my babies a long time ago (!) and I guess some advise has changed now, but I just wanted to sympathise with you. I remember it so clearly, the pain (my nipples bled with one of mine) and thinking I'd never get it right.
But I did and it was worth it in the end.
Hang in there, you'll get it!

Dermymc · 01/11/2018 22:28

Oh gosh keep going OP I promise it gets better. 72hours isn't really long enough to make a full decision, go for 8 weeks if you can. Honestly it's worth it for being able to leave the house with just boobs and no bottles, for the ease of always being able to settle your baby and for for all the extra snuggles. You can do this! You

Almostthere15 · 01/11/2018 22:30

Oh lovely I remember those days well. Lansinoh is your friend. I think we sell a bit of a lie with bf, for the best of intentions, in reality I think it can really hurt to start but generally improves over time.

I second feeding lying down, even with huge boobs it feels manageable. Loads of explanatory videos on you tube. I feed from the side on the mattress which helps hold my boob up. I switch baby either side of me for each boob.

You can have painkillers too which might take the edge off.

Just because it's natural doesn't mean it's easy, it takes practice for both of you. After all walking is completely natural but it doesn't happen over night.

Be really kind to yourself and accept all offers of practical help while you get used to a lovely new human.

Original poster
HeyDuggee24 · 01/11/2018 22:30

Lansinoh applied in copious amounts from feed one. I made that mistake last time, not again Wink

I'm confident its the latch. When the lady was here today it made a huge difference, Im just struggling to replicate it on my own. Im hoping when the milk comes in it will make my boobs a bit perter which will change things. I just need to get there!

OP posts:
Justlikedevon · 01/11/2018 22:32

My baby is a teenager and I still remember the pain! I had (have) massive boobs and found a 'rugby ball' approach helped - tucked her under my arm rather than sitting on my tummy. Don't be scared to turn dc's head to get on properly. And congratulations!

Badgerbird · 01/11/2018 22:33

You're doing a bloody brilliantly job!! I just wanted to say we are still bf nearly 18 months on (and we love it! Only 1 feed a day now instead of 12 hrs a day at the beginning) and I was totally where you are at. I’d cry at the thought of a feed and it felt like her tongue was made of razor blades. Hang on in there and get all the support you need. X

louella99 · 01/11/2018 22:33

I really feel for you. My DS is 10 weeks old, I'm sitting feeding him as I type. In the first 3 weeks I couldn't have done this. I was in so much pain and cried during some feeds. Not good! It was a combination of baby having a tiny mouth (it's much more comfortable for me now he's grown), tongue tie that was snipped at 2 weeks old, and a lack of confidence. And probably loads of other reasons!

I was encouraged to do formula top ups. Nothing wrong with that whatsoever. I decided to persevere with EBF though and it's soooooo much better now.

pasbeaucoupdegendarme · 01/11/2018 22:33

Oh bless you. Sounds like you’ve done it before and you know it gets better, but FML it hurts to start off with.

Good luck.

madmum5811 · 01/11/2018 22:39

I wish midwives would be honest about how painful though worthwhile it is. I had a lovely older midwife who said because of my big boobs I should use my forefinger to depress my boob in above babies mouth so that he could breathe more easily it kind of flattens it out. It worked until he grew bigger himself. I had blisters on my nipples to start with, agony...

Happygolucky009 · 01/11/2018 22:39

Congratulations on your new lo.

I agree changing position will help, I would always feed using rugby hold and an exaggerated attachment/flipper technique to deepen the latch. It will get better soon x

Original poster
HeyDuggee24 · 01/11/2018 22:42

Thanks for all the stories and tips! BrewCakeFlowers for everyone who is/has gone through it!

I "failed" with DS1 and never really got over it. Just so desperate for it to work this time round!

OP posts:
BernardsarenotalwaysSaints · 01/11/2018 22:44

Congratulations on dc2!

I remember well what you mean about small mouth & big boobs, to an extent it is a time thing. But what helped me during that phase was the 'laid back' position as they just sort if a fall on. It was the only way I could get dc5's latch right at the very beginning so it might be worth a go.

Sandinmypants · 01/11/2018 22:45

Congratulations on your new arrival! I remember the tear inducing pain of those first few days while your nipples get ravaged with them trying to get your milk in. It’s horrendous. If any of it helps, here’s what helped me:

  • I am also big of boob and I found holding it like a hamburger closer to my nipple helped to get it into the mouth more easily,
  • the flipple technique as previously mentioned was great for encouraging a nice deep latch.
  • multimam cold compresses. Get some of those bad boys on your nipples. They were seriously fantastic for healing the damage already done in the first few days of ravaging. I can still remember the feeling of relief from them. Lansinoh is great day to day, but the cold compresses are the bees knees. You can get them in boots.

Hope that helps! Good luck 😉

ijustwantasofa · 01/11/2018 22:46

NIPPLE SHIELDS
give them a try
They saved me with dc2's breastfeeding

Notjustanyone · 01/11/2018 22:49

It's been such a short time and it normally takes a couple of weeks to get established.
I have breast fed 3 babies to a year old and with my first I had to resort to nipple shields because my nipples were so sore. She opened wide and took the whole nipple but it was still sore and rightly so it's normal when something is causing friction. After a couple of weeks your nipples will recover and then you look forward to the time when someone makes a noise and the baby turns it's head with your nipple still in it's mouth. Ouchy 
Good luck!

Pigeonpresent · 01/11/2018 22:56

If you google breast feeding latch videos I found the animated ones really helpful. Keep going, you’ll get there. Congratulations!

DorothyBastard · 01/11/2018 22:56

You can do this. It’s bloody hard at first (I’m on day 11 here, third baby) but if you hold the line and keep on with it you will get there. It’s bloody painful but it will get so much easier soon. You’re doing brilliantly