I fucking hate carving pumpkins

[HollidayArmadillo]

Who ever decided this was fun?
It's messy, sticky, fiddly, sweaty and really really fucking hard

And now it's something else that's become a competition, so a traditional scary face isn't good enough, oh no we need Spiderman and Darth Vader and Mona Lisa and the fucking Taj Mahal

Plus!
The kids can't even do it and inevitably get bored of watching me hack at a pumpkin muttering about "fucking Halloween" so they tootle off playing and I'm sat alone in the kitchen surrounded by innards trying to create a piece of art on a fucking vegetable wondering what the hell happened to my life

I fucking hate carving fucking bastard pumpkins

I had a go at a slightly more intricate one today.. it didn't turn out that great but along with my goofy one, they'll have to do!

I enjoy doing them but I only do simple ones. However I hate the smell of them. Even worse the smell of one a few days after it's been carved, it's nasty.

I was not amused when the nursery teacher suggested Mrs Groovee would like to carve the pumpkin yesterday. One child kept shouting "no Mrs Groovee" while I tried to cut the lid. Then another one was doing a good job getting the seeds out. Child number 1 just poured them back in! 🤦🏻‍♀️ 🎃

I'm definitely not doing it again, they can go crazy with paint and glitter next year, fuck this shit

My 2 and 4 year old loved scooping out the pumpkins tonight but the mess was something else! Worth it for the roasted seeds though.

Haha I'm with you OP! I let mine get on with it this year.
They drew on them, scooped and carveed them whilst I got on with a roast. They used the blunt pumpkin carving set from a few years ago. Kids are 7 & 9 and have done an ok job

It's not that bad, is it? DD wanted a pumpkin, so I got her the carving kit, set her out on the floor on a bin bag and let her get on with it. I only helped her to stencil the very basic face on to it. The rest was up to her. It's not neat, it's not perfect, it's still got some innards left inside it but if she wants to carve a pumpkin, she has to do it.

why are you all doing them now?

i spose tomorrow will be too late?

i did ponder getting a pumpkin for dd 18 who has a day off work tomorrow , well she might want to, but as said above, Fuckthis shit!

It's a nightmare...I have no idea how anyone manages to carve intricate designs...I can't manage anything more than triangle eyes and nose! Our pumpkins this year were as hard as concrete...I broke the knife trying to carve it!

Make sure it is the last time. Tell the children that it is being abolished after Brexit as it will scare Jacob Rees-Mogg's children.

I do all the Christmas shopping, all the wrapping, cards, all the helping out at school etc....dh does pumpkins. I help by encouraging the dc's to pick increasingly complex designs - helps him keep his edge.

Absolutely nothing to go with me. Entirely DH's department! 🎃😁

I has the same thought earlier while I was carving a cat into a bastard pumpkin. Tomorrow I've stupidly agreed to host a pumpkin carving event for the in laws kids. It's going to be a messy disaster

I cheat, and just draw on the face with a thick black marker. 5 mins.

Here the trick or treaters come around before it gets dark (we’re in Spring) so no point making the pumpkin into lantern.

I bought some nifty ‘tangled vine’ arms and legs on eBay, and I stick those into the pumpkin and sit him on my hedge. Usually by the time I go and retrieve him some wag has contorted his limbs into silly or rude positions!

SO glad I don’t have to gut him, with all that mess. Gives me more time to make ghoulish appetisers. Like those cream cheese & red relish on a rectangular cracker that look like bandaids. Eurrgh!

I hate it too. I lugged a massive bloody orange thing home on the bus, dumped it on at DP's feet and told him he has to carve the fucking thing this year. He has made a passable job of a cat - which is freaking out our actual cat. It's her first Halloween with us and the poor wee thing is a fur ball of anxiety with the decorations. I used to enjoy Halloween but now I really can't be arsed.

Am wondering whether I can buy one pre carved next year - might make it lighter to carry home too...

Hahaha 😂. Our pumpkin carving session turned into a massive row between ds and dd1, both claiming they could do it themselves, then demanding my help at the same time, plus there was only one suitable knife they were arguing over. Was trying to entertain 6mth dd2 at the same time. Dd1 (10) stormed off in a mood proclaiming 'this was supposed to be fun!! And you've all ruined it!' Arghhh. I then had to carve the pumpkin for me and dd2. They were shocked when me and dp said we never carved a pumpkin when we were kids. Halloween wasn't such a big thing then.

@DavetheCat2001 the goofy one is really cute. He looks so happy to have his friend Dracula come for a visit. :)

Don't do it. You do not need these competitions.

We paint ours with acrylic paint. Means the children dont need any help at all. Stick a few battery tea lights round them and job done.

I rebelled this year, and bought a reusable plastic pumpkin with battery and lights inside. Looks pretty, no slimy pumpkin mess to clear up

I spent ten minutes this morning carving a watermelon.

Much easier.

Smells ok.

I can eat the innards without needing to make a pie or anything.

Looks cheerful and red and green :)