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Original poster

Early puberty in girls

54 replies

UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 10:28

I'm currently feeling a bit desolate, which may be over-dramatic but I'm sleep deprived so please be kind....

My DD seems to be entering puberty at 8 and a half (spotted early signs yesterday). I've spent the night reading about all the dangers of this (mainly psychological), and all the ways I might have caused it. I'm devastated for her, as she's not someone who finds life very easy anyway (borderline ASD, potentially, though that's another thread).

She's slim, active and not very emotionally mature. I just did not expect this.

Can anyone just hold my hand and help me keep it together, please? Positive stories of early puberty very welcome!

TIA

OP posts:
Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 10:39

I've read that since it's after age 8 they wouldn't treat it so not much point in doctor. But has anyone had treatment after age 8, and is it recommended to delay things to a more average age in order to help psychologically?

OP posts:
BluthsFrozenBananas · 21/09/2018 10:44

When you say early signs, what do you mean? At that age my DD had BO and a touch of armpit hair, but it didn’t progress beyond that until very recently and she’s coming up for 11 now.

CherieBabySpliffUp · 21/09/2018 10:48

You've worried me now OP as I think my daughter is starting puberty at 9.5. Where have you found info regarding psychological problems?

Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 10:51

Sorry Cherie - didn't mean to worry you. And I think 9.5 is standard nowadays.

bluth, very start of a breast bud.

OP posts:
mummymeister · 21/09/2018 10:52

I don't think that 8 counts as early. she may have the signs of it now but her periods might not start until she is 10. I am a bit worried that you think that you might have caused this in some way. How? its usually based on when you start your periods.

you are clearly very anxious about this and you must make absolutely sure your anxiety doesn't transfer to her. Buy her the little book of periods to start reading - we started talking to all of our DD's when they were 6 or 7 because based on when mine started (10) we knew that theirs would probably start around then as well. you need to start having conversations with her, explaining body changes and doing it in such a way that its not this big dramatic thing but part of life. If you build it up into being a "big thing" then that is how she will see it. I sat with my DD's and we did an internet search and watched documentaries etc on how other cultures view puberty which they found fascinating. I did draw the line at going off in a tent but we did have a good discussion about it and made it not into anything dramatic. I think you need to stop focussing on dangers and negative aspects and try and see what you can do to help her to cope with the changes.

ADastardlyThing · 21/09/2018 10:56

I thought 8 was considered to be fairly normal? A quick Google shows the nhs website which says if it starts before 8 its worth seeing a doctor so 8.5 doesn't seem too concerning?

SecretWitch · 21/09/2018 11:05

My dd also started showing signs of puberty at age 9. She is 11 now and has not yet begun her period but I feel like it will be soon. She has special needs and is not at all emotionallly prepared to cope with this.
I have bought some different towels and tried talking to her about how to put them on and other general period stuff. She does not want to know.Thank you for starting this thread.

DrZoidbergsTentacles · 21/09/2018 11:07

Please don't fret. I was feeling the exact same way about my daughter who too was 8 a few months ago (she is now 9) - she had what felt like blueberries under her nipples - they came up and hurt her for a few weeks, and they soon went down again - this is just hormonal surges which will now come and go over time. Funnily enough, when i got talking to a few mums at school, pretty much all their girls were going through something very similar, so it's not uncommon at this age.

So while it may be the start that your baby is developing, she will always be your baby.

Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 11:07

That's useful, Mummymeister. I was 13, hence the shock. I think I've been reading too many scare stories about exposure to plastics, etc...

I know I need to calm down, which is why I posted (I've not been like this with DD, of course!).

Thanks again.

Dastardly, I think 8 is the very young end of normal, but still pretty young.

OP posts:
Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 11:09

Thank you so much, DrZoid.

Secret Flowers
It's so hard to see something starting which you don't feel like they're emotionally ready for.

OP posts:
BWatchWatcher · 21/09/2018 11:14

8 is the young side of normal.
Wine for you op.

BluthsFrozenBananas · 21/09/2018 11:19

The only that is absolutely known to sometimes cause early puberty which a parent has control over is obesity, exposure to plastics or whatever is speculation.

I don’t think it’s at all unusual for girls of 8 to have some signs, but it doesn’t all happen at once. It’ll probably be at least a couple of years until your DD starts her period, but even if it isn’t it’s not something terrible. Just approach it in a totally open and matter of fact way, don’t attach too much emotion to it or talk about how she’s growing up too fast or turning into a woman. It’s just another body change like getting taller or losing baby teeth.

Fatted · 21/09/2018 11:22

I started my periods at 10. Granted it was a long time ago now, but I have never heard of anything about the dangers of early puberty.

My parents were pretty relaxed about it all. I have an older brother, so they introduced us both to the idea of puberty around a similar time. I remember my mum buying me the just 17 advice book!! Shows how long ago it was!! I do remember my mum telling me about how I looked older than I was and to remember this when I was with boys/men. Terrible way of putting it, but it got the point across that my body would be looked at in a sexual way. Not that I noticed really. I was completely obvious to any attention from lads until I was much older.

The most important thing you can do is be there for your DD and support her through this. Let her know that you are there for her to talk to.

Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 12:16

Thanks BWatch

That's useful to know, Bluth. And very good advice - thank you.

Fatted, great to hear that being relatively early wasn't a problem for you. And yes, being there, and being calm, will be key.

OP posts:
GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 21/09/2018 12:56

I believe once breast buds apprear it’s normally two years to your period starting. My DD is 10.5 and hasn’t started yet but she is getting quite mature now and I think she would be able to cope fine in a way that unimaginative 2 years ago.

Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 15:26

That's interesting, Ghoul. A lot changes in 2 years, I guess.

OP posts:
Crazycrofters · 21/09/2018 15:32

Dd started her periods at 10. It was quite useful to get that milestone out of the way before she started secondary. She got used to taking sanitary towels to school etc in the safety of primary school. She was quite the celebrity being the first in her class :) Starting secondary is a big transition - it's nice not to have to worry about that too!

So I'd say early puberty has its benefits!

Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 15:33

That's ace, Crazy!

OP posts:
ittakes2 · 21/09/2018 15:34

Please don't worry - my daughter showed signs of breast buds since she was born! I had IVF and the doctor thought it was extra hormones - but breast buds go up and down etc. In my daughter's school, some girls were wearing bras in year 3 & 4 - most were wearing bras by the end of year 6 (11 years old).

SnuggyBuggy · 21/09/2018 15:34

There is treatment available if that's what you want. Obviously you would speak to a consultant and discuss the pros and cons

Dancergirl · 21/09/2018 15:39

As others have said, don't worry. It is a very slow process. My youngest dd was about 9 when I noticed some very light pubic hairs. Things progressed slowly over the next few years and she started her periods a few months ago aged 11 and a quarter.

DropZoneOne · 21/09/2018 15:40

It was a good year and a half between my DD starting to develop (pubic hair, BO and noticeable breast buds) and starting periods. She grew up a lot in that time, and whilst she's one of the few in her year (just started yr6), her teacher reassures me that there'll be plenty more over the next few months.

The main signal for us was the very rapid growth spurt, that seemed to kick off a lot more development, greasy hair, horrific mood swings ... and the periods followed 3 months later. So she went from 9 to 10 with hair and breast buds and no other signs. It's a fairly gradual process.

steppemum · 21/09/2018 15:40

I have 2 dds.
This was my experience: (and very similar to most of their friends, where I could tell)

breast buds, and BO - beginning year 4 ish, so age 8-9
body hair and body shape changing, and mood swings year 5-6 so age 9-11
Proper body changes, eg actual breast, proper pubic hair etc age 11-12

Then periods.
There were one or two who started periods in year 6, but most were older.

So beginning of breast buds age 8 is really quite normal.

Flowers
Original poster
UpsetNowPleaseAdvise · 21/09/2018 15:49

You're all amazing. Thank you for talking me down.

ittakes, actually, my DD had a breast bud (same side as the new one - one sided at present) when she was born - from my hormones, I was told. It went after a few weeks I think. Hadn't thought to connect the two....

OP posts:
Dancergirl · 21/09/2018 15:51

I believe once breast buds apprear it’s normally two years to your period starting

Yes and it could be even later. Dd's best friend started puberty around 9, now nearly 3 years on, still no periods.

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