DS off to university soon but doesn't drink alcohol - yet!!! HELP!

[rainbowstardrops]

Just as the title says really.
DS is off to university very soon but doesn't drink alcohol. It's just never interested him.
He only ever drinks water, black currant juice ie Ribena etc, milk or milkshakes

He's really conscious of the partying side of uni and although he's pretty sociable, he's worried about looking like a numpty while everyone else is getting wasted having a good time.

His friend suggested dark berry cider as it's supposedly 'like drinking Ribena' and so we bought him some yesterday to try before he gets there. Except that I forgot to tell him it was fizzy and he doesn't drink fizzy drinks either! (Trust me, he's not fussy about anything else, just what he drinks!) Although he is an odd boy as he never liked sweets either. He could eat his body weight in chocolate though
It all stems from him not tolerating fruit as a toddler and I think it put him off anything 'fruity' (except black currant obviously).

So my question is, can anyone suggest anything that he might quite like to drink?

I suggested he just be himself and say he doesn't like drinking but he's worried he's going to feel left out etc.

Please help!!!

It is possible to go to uni, have fun, and be teetotal.

I think it's time to leave your son figure this out for himself.

What a bizarre attitude.

If he isn't fussed about drinking he can have a soft drink surely? Why on earth would you encourage someone to drink alcohol to fit in? Just reassure him that it's perfectly ok for him to make his own choices.

Leave him be. He'll be fine drinking non alcoholic drinks. Anyone who doesn't want to be friends with him because he doesn't drink isn't someone he'd want as a friend anyway.

Posted too soon. My ds is just back from uni. One of his housemates didn't drink and it wasn't an issue. Ds said in his group there were some who drank, some who didn't. Really not a big deal.

If it really is an issue to just say I don't drink he can just say he drank at a young age and got so ill he was in hospital so doesn't now.

Plenty of students nowadays don't drink, there'll always be students that go out and get hammered five nights a week but equally there are also students who are clean living, do sports, focus on the academic side of things. All he needs to do is say "I don't drink, thanks" and leave it at that, anyone who tries to then pressure him into having a drink isn't someone he needs to be hanging out with.

Fellow uni student : "Oh don't you drink ? Is it a religious thing?"
Your Son : "No. I've just never liked the taste"
Fellow uni student :"Oh right"

Conversation over.

Not every student is a pisshead.

He'll soon learn to avoid those drinking bores that wheedle you into drinking, buy you alcohol anyway, or spike your coke with Bacardi

There is still a lot of growing up to be done at university, finding like-minded people, learning tolerance (of some things) and that it's ok not to hang out with dickheads just because you share halls.

I grew up a ton at university and learnt where my boundaries are and how to make them strong. I'm sure your ds will too. How has he coped so far with his peers drinking?

There are plenty of people at uni that don't drink. I'm aghast that you want to encourage it. Especially since in the days of early drinking you don't know your limits and can become seriously ill. I don't intend to introduce my teens to alcohol. I'll leave it up to them and if they show no interest at 18 I'll be fucking delighted.

When I went to uni there were two people who arrived never having drunk before.
One stuck with not drinking-when people were getting alcohol he got a pint of cola, which people assumed was a dark beer.
People generally just thought it one of his quirks and didn't worry about it, if they knew.

The other discovered alcohol towards the end of freshers' week and rarely sobered up until he left the course about half term.

I rarely drink, just not bothered. Generally uni students are more open to variety than 6th formers. As long as he doesn't sit there and lecture them on the perils of drink, or look disapproving then I'll bet no one will care.
Tell him to work out what he says and be consistent. So just say "not particularly keen on the taste" "I prefer..." or if he wants to just get through freshers' week "on antibiotics".

Gosh, please don't encourage your ds to start drinking! If he doesn't like alcoholic drinks, he can just have soft drinks instead. Plenty of students are teetotal these days, and they are still able to socialise. He needs to be more confident in who he is.

My son was similar to yours. Only drank milk or water. Never drank fizzy stuff. ( and he hated sweets, still does actually but that bit isn't really relevant is it?)

Anyway, now at uni, and has the most eclectic taste in alcoholic drinks. Fruit coders and rum are his preference, but he also drinks wine, and any number of other spirits.

Just leave your boy to it. He will find his niche. And if he ends up teetotal, that's fine too. I have been teetotal all my life. It is true, it is a bit of a social handicap, but still not a necessity.

My daughter's like this.
I didn't approach it like 'what drink will be palatable' as her friends are very creative in this way.
I made sure she understood that her tolerance would be low, so one or two units would have a fairly noticeable affect on her and too many would make her very ill or even kill her.

Actually she did appreciate suggestions of non-alcoholic drinks she could have that looked 'cool' like (for some reason) fentimans cans like rose lemonade.

I really wouldn’t worry.

My son had only ever had alcohol at his y13 leavers’ ball prior to uni. He was a water or milk drinker.

That all changed very quickly! He enjoys alcohol now, although hasn’t touched a drop all summer.

They figure it out for themselves and they don’t have to drink!

This will be my ds too.

He's only 15 and in year 11 but has been to several parties over the last year where he was the only one not drinking. Seriously! Some of them were still 14 at the time and made him feel abnormal.
I was out drinking from 14/15 so know it's a teen thing but I've told him that if he chooses not to drink then own his decision and don't make excuses. It is what it is.

I'm under no illusion that this may change but if it doesn't then so be it.
He's seen me with many a hangover and I think it's out him off

Not all students are raging alcoholics. DD2 has just finished university and barely drinks. We came away on holiday yesterday and she had a whole 3 mouthfuls of the wine with dinner on the plane. Don’t worry, he’ll cope.

Jeez, are you going to introduce him to weed too? Just because a lot of teenagers do it? He doesn't HAVE to drink alcohol for goodness sake, what a strange attitude to have!

Nobody will give a flying fuck whether or not he drinks alcohol. You can go out, socialise, and have a great time without drinking. I did it. I still do it. I have never missed out.

I absolute despise fizzy drinks. I didn't drink much atall when I used to go out simply because everything was fizzy! Orange juice/Cramberry juice is nice with vodka but if he doesn't tolerate fruit maybe not the best! Baileys is my poison 😄 although my drink lasts about 3 minutes!

Smirnoff ice/WKD aren't fizzy but I personally don't like them.

Gin & water is ok!

I managed three years at uni tee total. I've actually recommended my students don't get (too) drunk in freshers as there's just so much going on they won't want to miss out because of a hangover. Also, I never liked the idea of being planned in a completely unknown city and getting too drunk to be safe - before you find your friendship group no one is going to be looking for you in freshers week if you get lost/separated from the group.

Are you sure you are old enough to have a child off to uni op? You sound very immature.

Why do you feel it necessary to find an alcoholic drink that you ds likes? Drinking alcohol is not a requirement, leave him be.

Thank you to the helpful posters. I guess both DS and myself have visions of Freshers week being an alcohol induced binge fest and he was worried about looking silly with his glass of water!

I suppose I didn't fully appreciate that there would be plenty of others who weren't drinking. He's certainly the type that would want to be out having fun and not shut away in his room or whatever.

I also said in my post that I've told him to just be himself and just say he doesn't drink.
He's managed so far but he's just naturally a bit anxious about fitting in and making friends when he doesn't know anybody and is hours away from home.