You're invisible once you're 40, what's the point?

[catdrugs]

I just feel I've dedicated all my life to false premises. Looking attractive - well that falls apart once you have kids and reach a certain age, blokes and young women just see through you and it's superficial and empty anyway.
Career ha! That falls apart once you have kids unless you are dedicated enough to override any guilt about long hours in child care. Guilt, guilt and more guilt is a woman's lot anyway whatever you do.
Motherhood - yes it is a great thing in many ways but it's thankless and your kids only like you for a decade then they hate you in their teenage years and don't need you after that.
Religion - don't have it, don't believe in after life.
So what's the fucking point?
If you're all buzzing with happiness fill me in with your secret.

I turned 40 this year btw.

Oh and I'm getting alot of male attention but happy married so using it as a boost and nothing more.

I totally get your OP. I feel exactly the same.

I do understand the invisible thing. I was never a raging beauty but I still used to draw admiring glances now and then. Not now. I used to have no problem being served in a busy bar. Now I actually try and avoid being the one to go and get drinks because guaranteed I will be waiting a long time to be served. I just usually give a friend the money for them now and ask her to go. I hate being invisible, so I definitely get that aspect of your post. I had been trying to make the effort to keep up my appearance in my 40s but now at nearly 50 i’m giving up. It’s true that no one sees me anyway so what’s the point? Maintaining your appearance is expensive and time consuming. And I never got this “doing it for yourself” thing. I don’t spend all day looking in the mirror so if no one else is going to see me then no, i’m not fussed about doing it for “me”.

I'm 42. I get my hair done regularly, wear makeup and like to dress in a way that makes me feel attractive. I've got no interest in attracting male attention, but looking good makes me feel more confident.

My kids are in my teens. They don't hate me. Sure it's difficult sometimes, but on the whole I'm enjoying watching them grow up and go through all the rites of passage - learning to drive, first festival, first girlfriends, off to Uni, etc.

As for career. Well for me, 40 has been the decade when my career has really taken off as I no longer have to worry about school pick ups/ drop offs, etc.

I'm a single Mum so it's not like my life is particularly easy, but can honestly say I'm happy.

I'm 42. I get my hair done regularly, wear makeup and like to dress in a way that makes me feel attractive. I've got no interest in attracting male attention, but looking good makes me feel more confident.

My kids are in my teens. They don't hate me. Sure it's difficult sometimes, but on the whole I'm enjoying watching them grow up and go through all the rites of passage - learning to drive, first festival, first girlfriends, off to Uni, etc.

As for career. Well for me, 40 has been the decade when my career has really taken off as I no longer have to worry about school pick ups/ drop offs, etc.

I'm a single Mum so it's not like my life is particularly easy, but can honestly say I'm happy.

babba what a bizarre post!
For what it’s worth, most of us who don’t hold stock in a make-believe sky resort as some sort of eternal reward, manage to get through the day by making the most of what we actually have.

Well I like babba s post. It’s what she believes and this strengthens her. Why do people feel the need to bring others down about their beliefs I just don’t understand.

I would say my sharp decline came at 45. So it may still hit those of you in your early 40s!