What does the Queen keep in her handbag??

[DavetheCat2001]

So..the queen always has a handbag with her.

I was just wondering (aloud to OH who was no use at all), what do you think she carries in there?

Mobile phone? - does the Queen have one?? OH thinks she must have, but...really?

Make up/comb etc? - surely she has 'people' to do that for her.

A diary maybe?

What else? I'm thinking about my own bag which has:

purse - does the Queen need to actually pay for anything?
keys - to Windsor castle??
Phone - hmmm..?
Make up - has anyone ever seen her touching up her MU? Or would she really pop to the ladies room to rouge-up?

What else??

Stealth are the tights in case she doesn't get the she wee out in time?

One ring to rule them all

Brilliant!

Tena pads n
A packet of fags

Nando's black card
Pink lipstick
Gin
Gloves

A stick on smile - hasn't been used for years.
Sunglasses - in case Camilla smiles
Condom - in case Andrew fancies a quick bum session with one of the butlers.
Chaz's pension book
A spare personality for Edward
A spare battery for Ann's fanny balls

An unwrapped boiled sweet covered in fluff, and the secret code to switch off Prince Philip, when he goes haywire, near strong magnets.

Morning, maybe an extra pair of gloves or nothing at all:)

Havana haha banana whaaaat

This is off topic but I was thinking about royal people yesterday. OH and I are lucky in that during the night he can go to one toilet where the seat remains up and I can go to another toilet where the seat remains down. I wondered whether royal people always have this luxury or whether they argue over the seat.

Contributors to: WHAT DOES THE QUEEN KEEP IN HER HANDBAG? Gave me ideas for this poem:

Maybe a photo of her favourite corgis
Or, a foil-wrapped dog biscuit?
Surely, a collapsible crown.
A fold-up tiara would be
more practical - I guess.
Her Majesty loves horses, so a
carrot or two is de rigueur.
Spare undies would not go amiss.
Emergency use false teeth? Possibly.
As much as one can surmise,
pearls would not surprise.
Predictably, a ready made speech
on neatly folded vellum beginning
with the words: "My husband and I."

If I could be so bold – Ma'am -
I suggest a personal alarm.
A spare pair of gloves too;
all those sweaty handshakes.
But so as not to make you huffy,
in case The Poet Laureate may know
What's in The Royal Handbag?
I’m going to ask Carol Ann Duffy.

Tobias

What's in The Queen's Handbag? Contributors inspired this poem:

Maybe a photo of her favourite corgis
Or, a foil-wrapped dog biscuit?
Surely, a collapsible crown.
A fold-up tiara would be
more practical - I guess.
Her Majesty loves horses, so a
carrot or two is de rigueur.
Spare undies would not go amiss.
Emergency use false teeth? Possibly.
As much as one can surmise,
pearls would not surprise.
Predictably, a ready made speech
on neatly folded vellum beginning
with the words:"My husband and I"
under NUKE A DUKE fridge magnet.

If I could be so bold – Ma'am -
I suggest a personal alarm.
A spare pair of gloves too;
all those sweaty handshakes.
But so as not to make you huffy,
in case The Poet Laureate knows
What's in The Royal Handbag?

Tobias
I’m going to ask Carol Ann Duffy.

I'm surprised this thread still going - who cares what the old trout has got in her bag. The sooner we as a nation wake up and tell these parasites to fcuk off the better off we will be.

Strong ribbed condoms for when Philip wants to take her up the arse!