When were you last offended?

[karmical]

Inspired by another thread.

I can’t remember when I was last offended. Can you?

People on mumsnet are offended 24/7 aren’t they??

I can’t remember. I’m in the camp of being offended is a choice.

I don't consider myself important enough to be offended. Pissed off, yes, but not offended.

There's always the very real possibility that if you point out your offence the answer will be 'So?'

In my experience, people who get offended are generally up themselves.

I was annoyed in M&S cafe when a man pushed in the queue and got served before me because, as the woman serving told me, “men need their food” . I have been told I should be offended but I can’t see it, I was definitely annoyed though!

Posted too soon

... annoyed enough to go to Wholefoods instead where they only charged me 50p for a glass of milk for DS instead of £1.25, so win win really!

offended not sure - last hurt by a throwaway comment when an uncle called me fat and my mother got angry with me for saying I was offended. I was trying to be more resilient. I was not looking to be offended at all. Some things do hurt though.

I was hurt /offended by being excluded repeated by the same woman at work a while back but I'm dealing with it now by just focusing on individual relationships and if I'm excluded I'm excluded. So be it. At least I don't have a stain on my character.

Oh, I know. When I was looking for work a few people told me a poundshop was looking for staff. I wasn't desperate for the money in the short term. I wanted to get back to work for my long term plan. I was hurt that that's what a friend thought I was worth despite all the experience and courses and skills I had. But hey.

ps, that is over about 4 years.

I think the last thing that set me off on a rant on facebook was during that #meetoo campaign which I joined in with for personal reasons... and I specifically outlined those reasons in what I wrote and then I detailed my own experience which was obviously hard for me to do as it was quite horrific.
I got a lot of sympathetic comments which was nice but not expected, I just wanted to put my experience out there in the hopes it would help other women find the strength to talk about these things...

But then there was one female friend that in the midst of all these comments had written 'dont you think this alienates men?'
That wouldnt have offended me as much if it had come from a stranger... but just the thought that someone who calls herself my friend could read a detailed account of abuse I endured and then just write...'this alienates men' with no preamble at all....no 'imm sorry for what happened to you' etc but just straight in there with the 'what about the men?'
Yeah I was pretty offended.

dont you think this alienates men?

WTF? Did you say anything back?

My ex MIL asked if my partner split up with me due to being “lower class”

A couple of weeks ago? A friend shared a meme I was mildly offended by. I was peeved for 10mins then I got over myself.

Totallylost18 Now that was meant to offend, surely?

A card for something I am interested in doing was put through my neighbour's door. She is an awful self-entered bore so I try to avoid her but I ran into her in the street and was deflecting spending time with her till I came back from holiday. Oh doing x, are you? snigger snigger. Yes, I was offended, and she is also a rude, nosy bitch.

Ive decided not to be offended by anything
Most people speak without thinking and often they don’t mean what they say
And anyway it speaks lots about them not me

Life’s too short for it all

MIL and especially FIL used to tell me not to feed or change my baby until they said do. I wasn’t offended but I got bloody annoyed about it. When DH finally told them to stop it THEY were offended!

She didn’t say it to me so not 100% sure she knew I’d find out. It did sum up her behaviour for the last 8 year though. (And tbh wasn’t as offended as I should have been)

I did try and calmly explain why I was hurt but she kept going on about how I shouldnt say anything unless I can accept that people may have a different opinion.... which would be fair enough if it wasnt a friend and it wasnt under a description of me getting beaten and raped. I dont think anyone with any decency and/or who considered themselves a friend would think that that was an apporopriate place to 'disagree' with someone.

In the end I just blocked her. Lifes too short. I thought about pointing out that I clearly love and respect men. Im married to a man, I have a son and an amazing father... but why on earth should I have to point that out??

haha this was actually ages ago now and as you can see im still well offended!!

toothtruth I’m not surprised

@toothtruth, wow, some people are OFFENSIVE whether you're offended or not, that was a ludicrous comment.

Blocking her was a good move.

What does being offended feel like?
I dont think I've ever been offended tbh.

I'm offended by this thread

I'm from Yorkshire. We have no comprehension of offence given or taken.

I was offended when someone told me that 'everyone is on the spectrum'.
No not everyone is autistic and don't try to diminish my or my ds1 's struggle.

I’m not sure I’ve ever really been offended. I don’t take anything personally and certainly don’t listen to people I think are idiots.

I imagine this attitude of "oh no, I never get offended, I'm far too serene" is a lot easier to maintain when (like myself) you belong to a group that is not constantly subject to racial or sexual or disablist slurs. I mean, it would be nice to think the reason I rarely get offended because I have thought through life maturely and come to the conclusion that it is not worth it, but the actual fact of the matter is that I live in a world where very few people ever do say anything seriously offensive to me and where I don't think I am being held back by the colour of my skin or by my sexuality or my religion. Other people are not so lucky. Quite likely I would get offended if I were them. I might even consider it my duty to get offended, to make it clear that the behaviour in question was not acceptable.

The tenor of this thread seems to be that there is something wrong with being offended. The flip side of this is that it seems to provide a carte blanche to some bloody offensive people. Putting all the burden on the people who feel hurt: why you're not offended, are you, by being called a black bitch, how silly of you.

when i was asked if i was my best mates mum! twice in the same fucking night tho!!
wouldnt mind but im only 5 years older ffs