I’ve just nipped to Tesco and bought the dodgiest combination of things ever!...

[FuckyDuzz]

I didn’t even realise till I’ve just gone to put it away

I bought -
A ready meal for one
Bottle of wine
Bag of maltesers
&
A cucumber 🤦🏻‍♀️

The cashier asked me if I had anything exciting planned for the weekend and I said ‘no this is about as exciting as it gets for me these days’
🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

I can never go in there again can I?!

You could have had cat food too

Well at least you didn’t also buy a tube of lube and a copy of 50 shades.

Lol, when my twins & I were (TMI) simultaneously menstruating, my DH would go to 24-hour Tesco & buy 3 x 40 Tampax, 3 x big Cadbury’s bar of chocolate & a pork pie for himself ...😂

I’ve done that. I’ve also purchased a lone cucumber as a teen when dm sent me to the shops and I couldn’t work out why the cashier was sniggering.

@amusedbush were there 3 types of crisps though?! Love Peepshow!

@shakeyourcaboose

I love it too! I try not to be but I’m such a Mark

I made Greek salad yesterday and the cucumber I used was much longer than usual, which did make me laugh.

Which is also about as interesting as my life is these days.

You’re doing quite well, because at least you had your ready meal .

I remember being out with colleagues on a Friday night. We stopped at the supermarket and one picked up a DVD she wanted as well as a six-pack of Diet Coke. We did laugh.

I remember being visibly pregnant and purchasing gin (for a gift) and coathangers (found in the bargain bin). I didn't realise until DH pointed out how it could heave been misconstrued.

I got some interesting looks once for buying a pregnancy test, tampons and wine.

I raise you a trip to Tescos mid big house clean up the day before eldest ds’ birthday. I was stopped at self service buying a packry of rubber gloves, an entirely unrelated pack of condoms (we had a baby and I wasn’t back on the pill yet) and a Spiderman birthday cake. Must have looked like quite the party.

Wicked

I once bought wine, AA batteries and KY jelly. Draw your own conclusions.

I once stood in line behind a woman with nothing but a tube of KY Jelly and a packet of frozen sausages in her shopping basket...

When I was pregnant ( 8 months gone and massive ) I bought a pregnancy test for a young colleague who wouldn’t buy it for herself as she knew the chemist ( who also knew her family)
I bet the chemist thought when he served me
‘ surely she knows she’s up the duff ‘
Still makes me laugh years later

Once had a Tesco delivery that was a £39.99 bottle of champagne and a bottle of washing up liquid to take it over the £40 minimum!

I was quite ashamed today of my basket.

2 bottles of wine (was on special) a pack of nappies (again on special), Kettle Chips (special offer) and some bleach.

I'd gone in specifically for the cheap stuff - I love a deal - the bleach was an impulse buy

Reminds me of an episode of the Simpsons where Homer went into a shop to buy fireworks and came home with a load of bizzare stuff. Marge says, Geez Homer, whatever you've got planned for tonight, count me out.

When I was a student, my housemate asked if there was anything I needed while he was at the supermarket shopping for a party he was having. He cursed me later after the funny looks he got buying a conveyor belt full of booze and a pair of rubber gloves

60 cream cakes, Grazia magazine and a box of tampons at 8am on a monday morning.

It was my birthday and the cakes were for work.

I once accidentally left a banana in a plane toilet. I had it as someone told me that potassium was good for jet lag. I went to the loo and put the banana on the side as I rummaged in my bag for my hair brush. I left the loo and was making my way back to my seat at the back when someone shouted after me “Excuse me, you left your banana in the toilet!’

I once went in and bought two huge packs of sanitary towels, a box of paracetamol and a family size bar of dairy milk. I got a very sympathetic look from the lady on the checkout!

A couple of years ago I was in the queue behind a young guy (maybe 18) who had 2 ready meal curries, flowers, prosecco, and condoms. He was obviously hoping for a good night!

The woman in front of me at the supermarket yesterday had 10 lots of garlic (three bulbs in each net) in her trolley, along with 3 packs of toilet rolls.