Baby screams in the car

[Astrid2]

Sorry to post here. Just hoping for more replies!

My 4 month old has always been good in the car. We used to go out for drives when she was tiny and fussy to calm her down. We travel a lot as our famillies are far away.

The last month, baby has been absolutely screaming her head off in the car. We have bought a new car seat today. Didn't help. I've sat in the back with her. Didn't help. I just don't know what to do. It's so stressful.

It's not every time but if she's not tired enough to fall asleep, she screams. Nothing distracts her!

Anyone had this and found a solution? Please tell me it's just a phase!!

Only that works for us is giving DS constant snacks, but I know yours won't be old enough for that yet. Best thing for long journeys is to dress them in their pyjamas and set off at bedtime so they sleep the whole way and you can transfer them into cot at destination.

DD screamed all the way home from the hospital when she was born and it didn't stop in the car seat until she was probably about 9mo. What stopped it was a horror 10 hour journey when the M25 was shut and we had to drive through central London. I think the 10 hours basically cured her as we just had to drive and only stopped for feeds and nappy changes. She was fine after that (probably thought she was neglected so didn't bother crying but we just had to get home.

DS was a bit similar and we just rode it out after checking he was fed, dry and not obviously uncomfortable. He's fine now and with long distances to relatives we just had to turn the music up and crack on.

It may be the backwards movement. Unfortunately she is too little to face forwards :( If you crashed she'd be at serious risk. Apparently I used to get travel sick and hated the car as a baby as well until I went forward facing.

I think you can get one which lies flat and goes sideways on the seat - by Jané? But this would be yet another car seat, which may not even work - and she'll outgrow it by about 6 months anyway as these seats are only designed for little babies.

Unfortunately those lambskin inserts are not safe to be used in car seats. You can use them in a pushchair but not in the car. This is because they render the harness looser than it would be otherwise which is a risk for the child to be ejected from the seat in a collision. I didn't know this with my first and I had one too - but I wouldn't use one now.

DS used to be better if we sang to him - some songs worked better than others. One Man Went To Mow was very good :) I think he liked the "One man and his dog - woof!" part.

I tried absolutely everything - she developed travel sickness and projectile vomiting and I sold my car. Coming out the other side now age 10.

Ah, you have my sympathies. My youngest two were like this and nothing seemed to work. They just grew out of it in the end, thank bloomin god. I genuinely beleieve that they just hated being strapped down for no logical explanation in their minds, and not allowed to move about and have physical contact with us! Unfortunately it just meant we avoided long journeys for both their baby years and some of the early toddler years because it was too incredibly stressful and upsetting for everyone. Some relatives who lived far away wouldn't believe it was that bad and thought it was an excuse for not visiting but whatevs 😄 it was just too awful, especially if stuck in motorway traffic.

Unfortunately, this might also be the first signs of car sickness. Children don't get properly car sick (ie vomit) until the age of about 2. But DD (who now gets car sick very easily) used to always scream in the car as a baby, and I'm pretty sure it's because she felt ill.

Just to redress the balance dd1 went through a screaming in the car phase and has never complained of travel sickness (she's 9). It's a phase op, I don't think there's anything you can do really :/

Used to have this exact issue and we bought him a Tiny Love Take along mobile. It clips onto car seat handle and plays nice music and goes round and round. Used it for our second and solved the issue.

Now buy it as a baby gift for everyone in my life who has a new baby and they all say it's terrific

Could it be car sickness?

I know I can't sit backwards on any kind of transport without feeling and/or being sick. I feel sorry for children who have to be rear-facing these days because I'd have been utterly miserable sitting like that as a child!

Before I opened this I knew it would be about a 4 month old. We had the same thing - it's just a stage that lasts a few months. We sang to him and that used to help.

DS was similar but playing hungry eyes, over & over or so macho made him stop. Journey to Manchester we played them 46 times each!

DD loved pachabels canon.

My DD used to scream in the car at the same age. We found putting a muslin over the car seat (a bit like you would cover a bird cage!) worked. It was as if there was too much to see and she couldn’t focus her eyes. With a cover she relaxed and was happy on journeys. Music also helped.

DS was like this. He'd scream so much he was sweating, shuddering, puce etc. Nothing worked until he moved forward facing. He had severe separation anxiety and the car seemed to trigger it.

Try playing classical music in the car...my lo was the same and this is the only thing that settled lo in the car. It was magic like a reset button has been pressed.

Yeah we had this problem. We used to find rousing choruses of "what shall we do with the drunken sailor ?" Would sometimes help, I think he was stunned into silence. They are also very hot so don't bother with a coat etc. Things I prove with Front facing seats where they can see out.

My daughter was like this from about a month old. We tried absolutely everything including borrowing and trying out different car seats, and ended up having to resort to earplugs to take the edge off a bit and stop us crashing the car (which we nearly did on many an occasion from the distraction). When she got to about 8 months we found out the reason why - carsickness. Every trip, even very short ones, she ended up covering everything exorcist-style in vomit. It was absolutely horrific. We live where there is no public transport and ended up never leaving the house if we could avoid it.

The day we turned her forward facing, all screaming and vomiting stopped instantly. We used to wonder if she had grown out of it and turn her RF again to try it out and without exception, every single time it resulted in a car covered in vomit. We gave up trying when she was about 2. To this day I'm still riddled with guilt as I always intended to ERF, but it just wasn't to be and we were in far more danger of having an accident when distracted by screaming and stressing about the impending vomit. She's a brilliant traveller now, chats away happily in the back seat, spots her favourite cars on the motorway (she's partial to a Volkswagen or Vauxhall), might nod off on very long trips but no screaming and no vomit these days, thank the lord.

Hopefully this won't be the case for you, OP, and it's just a phase.

DVD player attached to seat back (Halfords £50) saved. My. Sanity.
(and maybe our lives as I can't concentrate at all when she is screaming!

Thank you so much for the all replies.

Definitely some tricks to try on our next journey. Very reassuring to know we aren't the only ones! As with everything in parenting!! Fingers crossed this is a short lived phase 🤞🏻

I have a very non Mumsnet solution which will definitely get me flamed but it worked.
My 8 months DS screamed his head of in car trips. None of the suggested above solutions worked except one. Lavender, Frankincesnce, mobile, stopping tio check the nappy, pieces of car seat removed and added, bottles, juice, food, toys didn't work as he would throw them at me hitting the windscreen. I was desperate.
A friend suggested offering everything else first and once they had all been rejected , ignoring him and turn the music in the car up gradually .
After a week or so, no screaming.

NB - it caused no hearing damage, he passed hearing tests with flying colours.

Happened with us as well. DD grew out of it eventually. In the meantime, an annoying CD of nursery rhymes helped!

My lovely friend, with DC similar age to mine, had one who did this. It was a phase and utterly horrible whilst it lasted . Utterly intractable, unfortunately, but the DC grow out if it. She minimised the amount she used the car for the duration.

It led to some rows about the rareity of family visits. Which ceased rapidly when they gave a lift to one of the complaining family and sat the person next to DC.

Sit next to baby and show him baby sensory videos from YouTube? Or baby shark? Calms mine down for five minutes or so.

As already mentioned, it could be car sickness. I remember our DD had already started being sick by 10 months old. It made it worse if she'd had milk in the last hour or two, but that's so hard to avoid.

Joining the thread on solidarity. If one of us is in the back making eye contact we can maybe stave off a meltdown for a short journey. Sometimes if DS goes in happy he will drop off to sleep, and I'm experimenting with leaving half an hour after a feed. Mostly though I ditch the car. Agree with pp about long journeys-the one we have done, we set off half an hour before bedtime. He did scream but fell asleep after 15 minutes or so. It's hard because under no other circumstances would I let him be that distressed for that long but I was desperate for a change of scene and to visit my parents. Only done it once though he's nearly 5 months old...

Are any of you using the baby seat on the front passenger side with the airbag disabled? I don't know if that's kosher but did wonder it it would help.

I can't turn the air bag off in our car
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